Эпизод с грудью
Описание
Джои принимает у себя отца и узнает, что у того роман на стороне; он разрывается между желанием рассказать матери и нежеланием рассказывать, но вскоре понимает, что она уже в курсе и хочет, чтобы все осталось как есть. Чендлер случайно видит Рэйчел топлесс после душа, и начинается цепная реакция обнажения, когда она пытается отомстить, увидев его голым. Вместо этого она застает Джои голым, который затем видит Монику без одежды, которая случайно застает отца Джои в душе. Всем не нравится новый парень Фиби, раздражающий психиатр по имени Роджер (Фишер Стивенс), который делает неприятно точные оценки компании.
Субтитры
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00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:19,560
CHANDLER: I'm sorry.
RACHEL: Oh, my God. That's it.
00:00:19,769 --> 00:00:22,021
You just barge in here
and you don't knock?
00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:24,106
You have no respect
for anybody's privacy.
00:00:24,315 --> 00:00:25,899
- Rachel, wait.
- No, you wait.
00:00:26,109 --> 00:00:28,610
- Can I just say one thing?
- What? What?
00:00:28,778 --> 00:00:32,072
That's a relatively open weave
and I can still see your...
00:00:32,782 --> 00:00:35,242
...nippular area.
- Ugh!
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:31,507
Honey, honey, tell them the story
about your patient...
00:01:31,674 --> 00:01:33,467
...who thinks things are
other things.
00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:35,260
You know?
00:01:35,595 --> 00:01:38,514
Like when the phone rings
and she takes a shower...
00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,017
That's pretty much it.
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,813
But you tell it really well, sweetie.
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:48,190
Thanks. Okay.
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:50,984
Now go away so we can
talk about you.
00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:52,903
Okay. I'll miss you.
00:01:55,031 --> 00:01:56,115
Isn't he great?
00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:58,617
He's so cute. And he
likes you so much.
00:01:58,827 --> 00:01:59,868
I know. I know.
00:02:00,036 --> 00:02:02,996
He's so sweet.
And so complicated, you know?
00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:06,625
And for a shrink,
he's not too "shrinky." You know?
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:08,752
So you think you'll do it on his couch?
00:02:09,003 --> 00:02:11,755
Oh. I don't know. That's a little weird.
00:02:12,006 --> 00:02:13,382
It's vinyl.
00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:19,346
- Okay. You guys want anything else?
- Oh, yes.
00:02:19,597 --> 00:02:21,098
- Could I have...?
- Sorry, we're all out.
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:22,599
- Anybody else?
- Okay.
00:02:23,643 --> 00:02:25,394
Did I, uh, miss something?
00:02:25,603 --> 00:02:28,814
No, she's still upset
because I saw her boobies.
00:02:29,607 --> 00:02:32,568
What were you doing
seeing her boobies?
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:33,861
It was an accident.
00:02:34,028 --> 00:02:36,864
I wasn't across the street with
a telescope and a box of doughnuts.
00:02:37,031 --> 00:02:38,323
[ROGER LAUGHS]
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:40,492
Can we change the subject, please?
00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:44,872
Because, hello? These aren't her
"boobies." These are her breasts.
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:49,501
Pheebs, I was hoping
for more of a change.
00:02:50,461 --> 00:02:54,089
I don't know why you're embarrassed.
They were very nice boobies.
00:02:55,383 --> 00:02:56,550
"Nice"?
00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:58,051
They were "nice"?
00:02:58,303 --> 00:03:01,054
That's it?
I mean, mittens are "nice."
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:05,517
Okay. Rock, hard place...
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:07,144
...me.
00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:10,355
[ROGER LAUGHING]
00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:13,483
You're so funny.
00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:16,778
He's really funny.
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:20,908
I wouldn't want to be there when
the laughter stops.
00:03:21,659 --> 00:03:23,118
Whoa, whoa. Back up there, sparky.
00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:26,663
What did you mean by that?
00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:30,792
It seems that maybe
you have intimacy issues...
00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:34,838
...that you use your humor
to keep people at a distance.
00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:37,132
Huh.
00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:40,219
I mean, hey, I just met you.
I don't know you from Adam.
00:03:41,971 --> 00:03:43,138
Only child, right?
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,850
Parents divorced
before you hit puberty.
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,562
Uh-huh. How did you know?
00:03:51,272 --> 00:03:52,397
It's textbook.
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:56,693
Hey, you guys.
00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:58,487
You all know my dad, right?
00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:01,406
- How long are you in the city?
- A couple of days.
00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:02,699
I got a job midtown.
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:04,785
I figure I'm better off
staying with the kid...
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:07,663
...than hauling my ass back and forth
on the ferry.
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,039
I don't know this one.
00:04:09,207 --> 00:04:11,375
- Oh. This is my friend Roger.
- Hi.
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:13,210
- Good to meet you.
ROGER: You too.
00:04:13,461 --> 00:04:16,255
What happened to the, uh, puppet guy?
00:04:16,464 --> 00:04:18,715
- Dad, uh...
- Oh, oh.
00:04:18,883 --> 00:04:19,967
Excuse me.
00:04:20,176 --> 00:04:21,843
So, Ross, uh, how's the wife?
00:04:22,011 --> 00:04:23,720
[ROSS GROANS]
00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:26,431
Oh for two, huh? Heh.
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:29,142
Uh, Chandler, quick,
say something funny.
00:04:38,403 --> 00:04:41,029
Gotta go. Ha, ha.
I miss you too.
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,365
I love you,
but it's getting late now...
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:45,242
Let me say hi. Hey, Ma.
00:04:45,493 --> 00:04:49,162
Listen, I made the appointment
with Dr. Bassida and...
00:04:50,248 --> 00:04:51,456
Excuse me?
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:56,503
Did you know this isn't Ma?
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:06,722
Her name's Ronni.
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:09,891
She's a pet mortician.
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,230
Sure.
00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:18,358
So how long have you been...
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:23,363
Remember when you were a kid,
I'd take you to the Navy yard...
00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:24,990
...and show you the big ships?
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:28,994
- Since then?
- No, it's only been six years.
00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:30,871
I wanted to give you
a nice memory...
00:05:31,122 --> 00:05:34,333
...so you'd know I wasn't always
such a terrible guy.
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:39,338
Joe, have you ever been in love?
00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:42,090
I don't know.
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,217
Then you haven't.
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:47,804
- You're burning your tomatoes.
- Hmm. You're one to talk.
00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:52,351
Joe, your dad's in love, bigtime.
00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:55,354
And the worst part is,
it's with two different women.
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:58,648
Oh, man. Please tell me
one of them is Ma.
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:01,818
Of course one of them's Ma.
What's the matter with you?
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:13,121
It's like if you woke up one day
and found out...
00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:15,457
...your dad was
leading this double life.
00:06:15,666 --> 00:06:19,669
He's, like, actually some spy
working for the CIA.
00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:21,588
That'd be cool.
00:06:22,423 --> 00:06:23,840
This blows.
00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,970
I know. Why can't parents
just stay parents?
00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:31,139
Why do they
have to become people?
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,308
Why do they have...?
00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:35,811
Why...
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:40,357
...can't you stop staring
at my breasts?
00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:46,363
What?
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,950
Didn't you get a good enough
look the other day?
00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:51,576
All right, we're all adults here.
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:54,579
There's only one way
to resolve this.
00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,331
Since you saw her boobies...
00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:59,084
...I think, uh, you're gonna have to
show her your pee-pee.
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:10,971
You know,
I don't see that happening.
00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:14,516
Come on. He's right.
Tit for tat.
00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,898
Well I'm not showing you my tat.
00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:24,025
[INTERCOM BUZZES]
00:07:24,986 --> 00:07:26,027
Hello?
00:07:26,195 --> 00:07:28,488
PHOEBE: It's Phoebe.
ROGER: And Rog.
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:30,907
Come on up.
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:34,119
Oh, good. Rog is here.
00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:38,540
- What's the matter with Rog?
- Nothing. It's a little thing.
00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:40,584
I hate that guy.
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:44,880
What? So he was a little analytical.
That's what he does.
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,007
Come on, he's not that bad.
00:07:47,216 --> 00:07:50,010
That's where you're wrong.
Why would I marry her...
00:07:50,219 --> 00:07:53,054
...if I thought on any level
that she was a lesbian?
00:07:54,056 --> 00:07:55,390
I don't know.
00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:57,350
Maybe you wanted
your marriage to fail.
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:04,441
- Ha, ha.
- Why? Why would I? Why?
00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:06,485
Why? Why? Why?
00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:10,655
I don't know.
Maybe low self-esteem?
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:14,868
Maybe to compensate
for overshadowing a sibling. Maybe...
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:17,913
Wait.
Go back to that "sibling" thing.
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,832
Well, I don't know.
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:24,211
It's conceivable that
you sabotaged your marriage...
00:08:24,462 --> 00:08:28,089
...so the sibling would be less
of a failure in the parents' eyes.
00:08:28,257 --> 00:08:29,883
[CHUCKLES]
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:35,722
That's ridiculous.
I don't feel guilty for her failures.
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:41,186
- Oh, so you think I'm a failure?
- Isn't he good?
00:08:41,395 --> 00:08:44,689
Yeah. No.
That's not what I was saying.
00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:46,942
All these years,
I thought you were on my side...
00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:49,528
...but maybe you were
sucking up to Mom and Dad...
00:08:49,737 --> 00:08:50,862
...so they'd favor you.
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:53,490
Hey, I married a lesbian
to make you look good.
00:08:58,454 --> 00:08:59,621
You're right.
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:01,289
I mean, you're right.
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:05,293
It wasn't just the Weebles,
but it was the Weeble Play Palace...
00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:10,257
...and the Weeble's Cruise Ship...
00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:14,427
...which had this little lifeboat
for the Weebles to wobble in.
00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:17,472
That's tough, tough stuff.
00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:21,101
Pheebs, if we're gonna
catch that movie, we gotta go.
00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:22,978
Okay. Feel better, okay?
00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:25,063
ROGER: We're gonna be late, sweetie.
- Okay.
00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:28,108
- Listen, thanks for everything, Mon.
- No problem.
00:09:28,484 --> 00:09:30,235
It was great seeing you again.
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:31,861
[ROSS MUTTERS]
00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,824
Mon, uh, easy on those cookies, okay?
00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:38,201
Remember, they're just food...
00:09:38,452 --> 00:09:39,828
...they're not love.
00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:45,917
I hate that guy.
00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:50,880
JOEY:
Good night, you guys.
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,553
Oh, look.
It's the woman we ordered.
00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:02,976
Hey. Can, uh... Can we help you?
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:06,479
Oh. No, thanks. I'm just waiting
for, uh, Joey Tribbiani.
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,399
I'm Joey Tribbiani.
00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:13,236
Oh. Oh, no, not you. Big Joey.
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:14,487
Oh, my God.
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:17,365
You're so much cuter than
your pictures.
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,536
I'm Ronni.
00:10:24,665 --> 00:10:25,790
Cheese Nip?
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:30,337
Uh, Joey's having an embolism...
00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,213
...but I'd go for a Nip.
00:10:39,430 --> 00:10:42,015
You see, most people,
when their pets pass on...
00:10:42,183 --> 00:10:44,893
...they want them laid out
like they're sleeping.
00:10:45,102 --> 00:10:48,271
But occasionally you get a person
who wants them in a pose.
00:10:48,564 --> 00:10:51,232
Like, uh, chasing their tail.
00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:55,236
Or, uh, jumping to catch a Frisbee.
00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:58,948
Joey, if I go first, I want to be
looking for my keys.
00:10:59,116 --> 00:11:00,950
[RONNI LAUGHS]
00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:03,203
- That's a good one.
- Hey, Joe.
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:04,954
Hey, Dad. Ronni's here.
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,456
- Huh?
- Hi.
00:11:06,707 --> 00:11:07,916
- Hey.
RONNl: Hey.
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:09,626
Hello, babe.
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,796
What are...? What are you doing here?
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:15,757
Oh, uh, you left your hair
at my apartment.
00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:18,385
I figured you'd need it
for your meeting.
00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:22,263
Thank you. Uh...
00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:26,851
So who's up for a big
game of Kerplunk?
00:11:31,315 --> 00:11:32,440
Look, I, uh...
00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,317
I shouldn't have come.
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:36,986
I gotta go.
I'll miss the last train.
00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:39,280
No, I don't want you taking
that thing this late.
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:41,866
- Where am I gonna stay? Here?
- Whoa.
00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:46,913
We'll go to a hotel.
00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:50,458
- No, you won't.
- No, we won't.
00:11:50,751 --> 00:11:53,586
If you go to a hotel,
you'll be doing stuff.
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:56,756
I want you right here,
where I can keep an eye on you.
00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:58,633
You're gonna keep an eye on us?
00:11:58,843 --> 00:11:59,884
That's right, mister.
00:12:00,052 --> 00:12:02,595
I don't care how old you are,
while you're here...
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:05,265
...you're gonna live by my rules.
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:11,771
And that means no sleeping
with your girlfriend.
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:15,066
Wow, he's strict.
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:16,776
Dad, you'll be in my room.
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:20,029
Ronni, uh, you can stay in
Chandler's room.
00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:22,657
Thanks.
You're a good kid.
00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,909
Come on.
I'll show you to my room.
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:30,498
That sounds weird when it's not
followed by, "No, thanks, it's late."
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:38,131
Okay. This is just for tonight.
Starting tomorrow, you gotta change.
00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:40,884
- Six years is long enough.
- What kind of change?
00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:43,094
- Break up with Ronni...
- I can't.
00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:45,972
Then come clean with Ma.
This is not right.
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:49,225
I don't wanna hear it.
Now go to my room.
00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:04,908
Hey, kickie.
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:10,121
- What are you doing?
- Trying to get comfortable.
00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:13,249
- I can't sleep in my underwear.
- Well, you're gonna.
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:21,382
I've been thinking...
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:24,928
...about how I'm always
seeing girls on top of girls.
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:31,184
Are they end-to-end,
or tall, like pancakes?
00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:34,771
You know what I mean.
How I date all these women.
00:13:35,022 --> 00:13:37,857
I always figured, when
the right one comes along...
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:41,402
...I'll be able to be a standup guy
and go the distance, you know?
00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:44,030
Now I'm looking at my Dad thinking...
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:46,658
You're not him, you're you.
00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:51,412
When they wanted you to go into
your father's business, did you cave?
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:52,705
- No.
- No.
00:13:52,873 --> 00:13:55,250
You decided to go into
the out-of-work-actor business.
00:13:57,211 --> 00:13:59,587
That wasn't easy, but you did it.
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,216
And I believe that
when the right woman comes along...
00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:05,343
...you'll have the guts to say:
00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:06,970
"No thanks, I'm married."
00:14:13,769 --> 00:14:14,978
You really think so?
00:14:15,479 --> 00:14:17,313
Yeah. I really do.
00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:19,148
- Thanks, Chandler.
- Get off.
00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:27,949
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:33,329
- Hi.
- Hi.
00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:34,581
May I help you?
00:14:34,748 --> 00:14:38,501
Uh, Joey said I could use your shower
since, uh, Chandler's in ours.
00:14:39,336 --> 00:14:41,254
Okay. Who are you?
00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:44,799
- Oh, uh, I'm Ronni. Ronni Rapalono.
- Uh-huh.
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,968
The mistress?
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,889
- Um, come on in.
- Thanks.
00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:53,057
Hi, I'm Rachel.
Bathroom's up there.
00:14:53,267 --> 00:14:54,309
Hey, Ronni.
00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:56,686
How long has Chandler been
in the shower?
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,688
Oh. Like, uh, five minutes.
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,065
Perfect.
00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:04,861
Fasten your seat belts...
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:06,696
...it's pee-pee time.
00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:13,995
Hey, Mr. Trib.
00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:15,914
Hey. Good morning, dear.
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:21,711
Chandler Bing,
it's time to see your thing.
00:15:28,594 --> 00:15:30,219
[RACHEL SHRIEKS]
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:36,893
- What's the matter with you?
- I thought it was Chandler.
00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:40,813
You were supposed to be in there
so I could see your thing.
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:45,276
Sorry, my thing
was in there with me.
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,035
PHOEBE: Hey.
ALL: Hey, Pheebs.
00:15:54,244 --> 00:15:56,621
MONICA: How's it going?
- Good. Oh, oh.
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,540
Roger's having a dinner thing
and he wanted me to invite you guys.
00:15:59,708 --> 00:16:00,792
[CHANDLER CHUCKLES]
00:16:04,254 --> 00:16:06,547
- So, what's going on?
- Nothing.
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,424
It's just that, uh...
00:16:09,426 --> 00:16:10,510
It's Roger.
00:16:10,928 --> 00:16:13,513
Um, ahem, I don't know.
There's something about... Ahem.
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:15,974
Basically, we just feel
that he's, uh...
00:16:16,225 --> 00:16:17,266
We hate that guy.
00:16:17,559 --> 00:16:18,726
MONICA:
We hate him.
00:16:19,103 --> 00:16:20,478
We're sorry, Pheebs.
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:21,980
Uh-huh. Okay.
00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:25,566
Don't you think maybe it's just that
he's so perceptive...
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,443
...that it freaked you out?
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:29,445
- No, I hate him.
- No, we hate him.
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:30,822
I'm sorry.
00:16:37,121 --> 00:16:38,663
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:45,795
Ma. What are you doing here?
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,047
I came to give you this...
00:16:48,298 --> 00:16:49,549
...and this.
- Ow.
00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:51,259
Big ring.
00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:54,554
Why did you fill your father's head
with that garbage...
00:16:54,805 --> 00:16:57,432
...about making things right?
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,934
Things were fine the way they were.
00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:02,854
There's chicken in there.
Put it away.
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,982
For God's sake, Joey.
Really.
00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,986
Hold on. You knew?
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,572
Of course I knew.
What do you think?
00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:15,199
Your father is no James Bond.
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,285
You should have heard
his cover stories.
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:19,787
"I'm sleeping over at
my accountant's."
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:22,290
I mean, what is that?
Please.
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,375
So then, how could you...?
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:27,086
Do you remember
how your father used to be?
00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:31,549
Always yelling.
Nothing made him happy.
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:35,511
Not that wood shop, not those
stupid little ships in the bottle.
00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:37,263
Now he's happy.
00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:40,099
I mean, it's nice.
He has a hobby.
00:17:42,686 --> 00:17:46,022
Ma, I don't mean
to be disrespectful, but...
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,940
...what the hell
are you talking about?
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:52,612
- I mean, what about you?
- Me? I'm fine.
00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:54,614
Look, honey...
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:57,075
...in an ideal world...
00:17:57,367 --> 00:18:00,536
...there'd be no her and your father
would look like Sting.
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,582
And I'll tell you something else:
00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:08,169
Ever since that
poodle-stuffer came along...
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:12,715
...he's been so ashamed of himself
that he's been more attentive.
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,801
He's been more loving.
00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:17,553
It's like every day is
our anniversary.
00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:20,181
I'm happy for you?
00:18:20,390 --> 00:18:21,599
Well, don't be.
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,519
Because now everything's screwed up.
00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:30,274
I just want it the way it was.
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:33,402
JOEY:
Ma, I'm sorry.
00:18:33,654 --> 00:18:37,115
I just did what
I thought you'd want.
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:41,285
I know you did, cookie.
Oh, I know you did.
00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:45,665
So tell me...
00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:48,167
Did you see her?
00:18:49,711 --> 00:18:50,795
Yeah.
00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:54,340
You're 10 times prettier
than she is.
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:55,883
That's sweet.
00:18:57,719 --> 00:18:58,970
Could I take her?
00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:02,974
With this ring, no contest.
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,397
ROGER: What's wrong, sweetie?
PHOEBE: Nothing.
00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:12,150
No, no. What's wrong? Come on.
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:13,776
Okay.
00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:18,781
It's nothing. I'm fine.
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:20,950
It's just, um...
It's my friends.
00:19:21,201 --> 00:19:23,870
They have a liking problem with you...
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:25,329
...in that, um...
00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:26,956
...they don't.
00:19:29,376 --> 00:19:31,752
Oh. They don't?
00:19:32,796 --> 00:19:34,046
But you know...
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:37,091
...they don't see all
of the wonderfulness that I see.
00:19:37,342 --> 00:19:40,845
They don't see all the good stuff
and all the sweet stuff.
00:19:41,096 --> 00:19:42,638
They think you're a little...
00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:46,100
- What?
- Intense and creepy.
00:19:48,687 --> 00:19:49,854
Oh.
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:52,648
But I don't. Me. Phoebe.
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,111
Well, I'm not at all surprised
they feel that way.
00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,739
You're not?
See, that's why you're so great.
00:20:00,115 --> 00:20:02,241
Actually, it's
quite typical behavior...
00:20:02,492 --> 00:20:06,662
...when you have this kind
of dysfunctional group dynamic.
00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:09,498
You know, this kind of codependent...
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:11,375
...emotionally stunted...
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:16,797
...sitting in your stupid coffeehouse,
with your stupid big cups...
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:20,384
...which, I'm sorry, might as well
have nipples on them.
00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:26,307
And you're all like,
"Oh, define me. Define me.
00:20:26,516 --> 00:20:29,310
Love me. I need love."
00:20:30,812 --> 00:20:32,438
So you talked to your dad, huh?
00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:35,691
Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on Ma,
like she wanted.
00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:38,527
Ma's gonna keep pretending
she doesn't know even though she does.
00:20:38,779 --> 00:20:41,530
And my sister Tina
can't see her husband anymore...
00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:43,824
...because he got
a restraining order.
00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:48,079
Which has nothing to do with it,
except that I found out today.
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,288
Wow.
00:20:49,456 --> 00:20:52,083
Things sure have changed here
on Walton's mountain.
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:55,419
So, Joey, are you okay?
00:20:56,046 --> 00:20:57,171
Yeah, I guess.
00:20:57,422 --> 00:20:59,674
It's just...
You know, they're parents.
00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:02,885
After a certain point,
you gotta let go.
00:21:03,387 --> 00:21:04,762
Even if you know better...
00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:07,473
...you gotta let them make
their own mistakes.
00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:08,724
And just think...
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:11,060
...in a couple years,
we get to turn into them.
00:21:11,311 --> 00:21:12,687
Oh, please.
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,523
If I turn into my parents,
I'll either be an alcoholic blond...
00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:18,776
...chasing after 20-year-old boys...
00:21:19,027 --> 00:21:20,820
...or I'll end up like my mom.
00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:26,867
- Hey.
ALL: Hey, Pheebs.
00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:28,536
MONICA:
How's it going?
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:32,039
Okay, except I broke up with Roger.
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,791
ALL:
Oh.
00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:35,126
Yeah, right.
00:21:35,294 --> 00:21:37,920
ALL:
No, no, really. Aw.
00:21:39,214 --> 00:21:42,925
- What happened?
- Ugh. I don't know. I mean...
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:44,635
He's a good person...
00:21:44,886 --> 00:21:46,762
...and he can be really sweet.
00:21:47,389 --> 00:21:50,266
And in some ways,
I think he is so right for me.
00:21:50,517 --> 00:21:52,935
It's just, I hate that guy.
00:22:00,652 --> 00:22:03,112
Hey, Joey. What's going on?
00:22:03,363 --> 00:22:05,990
Clear the tracks for the boobie
payback express.
00:22:06,241 --> 00:22:08,034
Next stop, Rachel Green.
00:22:11,538 --> 00:22:12,997
[MONICA & JOEY YELL]
00:22:14,374 --> 00:22:16,751
Joey, what the hell were you doing?
00:22:17,252 --> 00:22:19,545
Sorry, wrong boobies.
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:33,893
Hello, Joey.
00:22:35,437 --> 00:22:36,645
Hello, dear.
00:22:41,860 --> 00:22:43,861
[English - US - SDH]
rus__.srt
rus__.srt
00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:21,970
Чего это ты вламываешься без стука?
00:00:22,220 --> 00:00:24,060
Ты слышал слова
"неприкосновенность жилища"?
00:00:24,310 --> 00:00:25,850
- Рэйчел, стоп!
- Не затыкай мне рот!
00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:27,350
Можно сказать одну вещь?
00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:28,520
Что?! Какую?
00:00:28,770 --> 00:00:32,740
Плетение сравнительно неплотное,
так что я до сих пор вижу твои...
00:00:32,990 --> 00:00:35,360
...сосковые области
00:00:39,870 --> 00:00:42,700
1-й сезон, 13-я серия
"Титьки"
00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:29,750
Ой, солнышко...
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:32,590
...расскажи им историю
о своей пациентке...
00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:35,340
...которая думает, что одно -
это другое. Ну?
00:01:35,590 --> 00:01:40,060
Например, звонит телефон,
а она берет душ...
00:01:40,310 --> 00:01:43,270
В общем, это и вся история
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,810
Но ты здорово ее рассказываешь,
солнышко
00:01:46,060 --> 00:01:48,110
Спасибо
00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:51,230
Теперь уходи, чтобы мы
поговорили о тебе
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:54,450
Ладно. Я буду скучать
00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:56,030
Правда, классный?
00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,570
Он симпатичный.
И тебя, похоже, обожает
00:01:58,820 --> 00:01:59,780
Ага, я знаю
00:02:00,030 --> 00:02:03,000
Он очень милый. И умный -
психолог все-таки.
00:02:03,250 --> 00:02:06,460
И одарен не только умом.
Поняли намек?
00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,670
Думаешь завалить его
на его же кушетку?
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:11,670
Ну не знаю. Неудобно
как-то будет
00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,840
На кожзаменителе холодно
00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:19,260
Так, ребята, вам что-нибудь еще?
00:02:19,510 --> 00:02:20,970
- Да. Можно мне...
- Нет, это кончилось.
00:02:21,220 --> 00:02:23,310
Еще что-нибудь?
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,270
Извините, я что-то пропустил?
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:29,270
Она расстроена, что я видел
ее титьки
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,480
А с какой стати
ты смотрел на ее титьки?
00:02:32,730 --> 00:02:33,530
Это была случайность
00:02:33,780 --> 00:02:38,160
Я не сидел в доме напротив
с телескопом и чипсами
00:02:38,410 --> 00:02:40,660
Так, давайте сменим тему, а?
00:02:40,910 --> 00:02:46,330
Кстати, да! У нее не "титьки".
Вот это - ее грудь
00:02:46,330 --> 00:02:50,130
Фибс, я надеялась сменить
тему еще больше
00:02:50,380 --> 00:02:55,050
Ну не знаю, чего ты бесишься.
Титьки были такие славные
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,630
"Славные"?
00:02:56,880 --> 00:02:57,970
Значит, они "славные"?
00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:02,510
И всё? Знаешь, это варежки
бывают "славные"
00:03:03,510 --> 00:03:05,390
Ага! Молот... наковальня...
00:03:05,640 --> 00:03:08,020
...я.
00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,570
А ты комик!
00:03:14,820 --> 00:03:16,820
Он такой юморист!
00:03:17,070 --> 00:03:21,320
Но не хотел бы я быть рядом,
когда шутки кончатся
00:03:21,570 --> 00:03:24,580
А ну поподробнее, живчик
00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:27,250
Что ты имел в виду?
00:03:27,500 --> 00:03:30,670
Похоже, у тебя проблемы
с интимной сферой...
00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:36,300
...и ты с помощью юмора
держишь людей на расстоянии
00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:41,680
Вот я только что тебя узнал.
Я не знаю твоего прошлого.
00:03:41,890 --> 00:03:44,260
Единственный ребенок, так?
00:03:44,510 --> 00:03:48,310
Родители развелись еще
до твоего полового созревания
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:50,940
Да... Откуда ты знаешь?
00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:53,860
Из учебника
00:03:55,570 --> 00:03:56,610
Привет, ребята
00:03:56,860 --> 00:03:58,860
Все знают моего папу, да?
00:03:59,110 --> 00:04:01,280
- Надолго вы в город?
- На пару дней.
00:04:01,530 --> 00:04:02,620
Нашел клиента в центре.
00:04:02,870 --> 00:04:05,080
Мне удобнее заночевать у сына...
00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:07,580
...чем носиться туда-сюда
на пароме
00:04:07,830 --> 00:04:09,080
А этого я не знаю
00:04:09,330 --> 00:04:11,250
Это мой друг Роджер
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,130
- Приятно познакомиться, Родж.
- И мне, сэр.
00:04:13,380 --> 00:04:16,130
А куда делся тот кукловод?
00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:18,760
Папа!
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:19,840
Извините
00:04:20,090 --> 00:04:23,720
Ну, Росс, как там супруга?
00:04:24,550 --> 00:04:26,680
Ноль очков с двух попыток, да?
00:04:26,930 --> 00:04:30,600
Чендлер, а ну быстро скажи шутку!
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,690
Мне пора
00:04:39,940 --> 00:04:40,950
Я тоже скучаю
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:43,280
Я тебя люблю,
но сейчас уже поздно...
00:04:43,530 --> 00:04:45,160
Дай поздороваться.
Привет, мама!
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:49,910
Слушай, я договорился
с доктором Бассидой, и...
00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,920
Прошу прощения?
00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:57,960
Ты знал, что это не мама?
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,180
Ее зовут Ронни
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:11,350
Она хоронит домашних животных
00:05:14,060 --> 00:05:16,110
Ну да
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:19,820
И как долго у вас уже...
00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:24,860
Помнишь, как в детстве я водил тебя
смотреть на большие корабли в доке?
00:05:25,110 --> 00:05:26,450
С тех пор?
00:05:26,700 --> 00:05:28,870
Нет, пока всего шесть лет
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,790
Я просто хотел, чтобы ты вспомнил...
00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:35,790
...обо мне что-нибудь хорошее
и не держал на меня зла
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:40,800
Джо, ты был когда-нибудь влюблен?
00:05:41,130 --> 00:05:42,510
Не знаю
00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:44,510
Значит, не был
00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:46,260
Следи за своими помидорами
00:05:46,510 --> 00:05:49,260
Ага, кто бы говорил
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,220
Джо, у твоего папы большая любовь
00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:55,270
И хуже всего то, что
с двумя разными женщинами
00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:58,560
Блин! Скажи мне,
что одна из них - мама!
00:05:58,810 --> 00:06:03,280
Конечно, одна из них - мама.
Не заговаривайся!
00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:13,000
Это как будто проснулся
и вдруг понял...
00:06:13,250 --> 00:06:15,330
...что твой отец живет
двойной жизнью
00:06:15,580 --> 00:06:19,960
Как будто он на самом деле
шпион из ЦРУ
00:06:20,210 --> 00:06:22,090
Было бы круто!
00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:25,300
А вот это - не круто!
00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:28,890
Да уж. Почему бы родителям
не быть всегда родителями?
00:06:29,140 --> 00:06:31,060
Зачем они становятся
просто людьми?
00:06:31,310 --> 00:06:33,560
Зачем им нужно...
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,350
Зачем...
00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:41,440
...ты все время пялишься
на мою грудь?
00:06:41,690 --> 00:06:44,280
Что?
00:06:45,110 --> 00:06:46,900
Что?
00:06:47,150 --> 00:06:49,870
Ты тогда не насмотрелся?
00:06:50,120 --> 00:06:51,450
Ладно, ладно, все мы
здесь взрослые люди
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:54,450
Есть только один способ
разрешить конфликт
00:06:54,700 --> 00:06:56,210
Раз ты видел ее титьки...
00:06:56,460 --> 00:07:00,540
...думаю, ты должен показать ей
свою пипиську
00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:11,850
Знаешь, я почему-то против
00:07:12,100 --> 00:07:15,980
Да ну. Он прав. Зуб за зуб
00:07:19,310 --> 00:07:23,360
Не покажу я тебе свой зуб!
00:07:25,990 --> 00:07:29,570
- Это Фиби.
- И Родж!
00:07:29,820 --> 00:07:30,780
Поднимайтесь
00:07:31,030 --> 00:07:35,040
Какое счастье! Родж пришел!
00:07:35,290 --> 00:07:38,460
- Чем тебе Родж не угодил?
- Ничем. Так, ничего особенного.
00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:40,920
Я его ненавижу!
00:07:41,170 --> 00:07:44,800
Чего? Ну любит человек анализировать.
Работа такая.
00:07:45,050 --> 00:07:46,880
Да ну, ничего в нем плохого нет
00:07:47,130 --> 00:07:49,880
А вот тут ты ошибаешься!
Зачем мне было на ней жениться...
00:07:50,130 --> 00:07:53,720
...если подсознательно я знал,
что она лесбиянка?
00:07:53,970 --> 00:07:55,310
Ну не знаю
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,810
Может, ты хотел,
чтобы твой брак рухнул
00:08:02,770 --> 00:08:06,230
Зачем? Зачем это мне?
Зачем, зачем, зачем?
00:08:06,650 --> 00:08:10,530
Не знаю. Может,
заниженная самооценка?
00:08:10,780 --> 00:08:15,280
Может, чувство вины за подавление
младших в семье
00:08:15,530 --> 00:08:17,830
Стоп! Поподробнее про подавление
младших
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,710
Ну я даже не знаю
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:24,130
Можно себе представить, что ты
довел свой брак до ручки...
00:08:24,380 --> 00:08:29,550
...чтобы сестра казалась меньшей
неудачницей в глазах родителей
00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:37,180
Курам на смех! Я не виноват
в том, что у нее жизнь не удалась.
00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:42,060
- Так по-твоему, у меня жизнь не удалась?
- Специалист, а?
00:08:42,310 --> 00:08:44,560
Да. Нет, я не это хотел сказать
00:08:44,810 --> 00:08:46,860
Я думала, все эти годы
ты на моей стороне...
00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:49,400
...а ты, наверное, просто
подлизывался к маме с папой...
00:08:49,650 --> 00:08:50,740
...чтобы они любили тебя больше
00:08:50,990 --> 00:08:54,950
Эй! Да я женился на лесбиянке,
чтобы ты выросла в их глазах!
00:08:58,370 --> 00:08:59,540
Ты прав
00:08:59,790 --> 00:09:01,160
Нет, серьезно, ты прав!
00:09:01,410 --> 00:09:06,750
Это был не просто ванька-встанька.
У него был свой дворец.
00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:10,170
И круизная яхта
00:09:10,420 --> 00:09:15,300
Со спасательной шлюпкой,
чтобы он там качался!
00:09:15,550 --> 00:09:17,510
Я понимаю, как это тяжело
00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:21,560
Фибс, если мы хотим
успеть на кино, нам пора
00:09:21,810 --> 00:09:22,850
А ты не расстраивайся, ладно?
00:09:23,100 --> 00:09:24,940
Фибс, мы опоздаем!
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:26,900
Спасибо за все, Мон
00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:28,150
Не за что
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:31,690
Приятно было снова увидеть вас,
ребята
00:09:32,860 --> 00:09:35,740
Мон, аккуратней с печеньем, ладно?
00:09:35,990 --> 00:09:38,120
Помни - это просто еда...
00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:41,290
...а не любовь
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:47,380
Я его ненавижу!
00:09:49,550 --> 00:09:52,340
Спокойной ночи, ребята
00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:58,010
Ой, смотри! Вот и женщина,
которую мы заказывали
00:10:01,770 --> 00:10:03,560
Привет, чем можем помочь?
00:10:03,810 --> 00:10:07,650
Ничем, спасибо.
Мне нужен Джои Триббиани
00:10:07,900 --> 00:10:10,110
Я - Джои Триббиани
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:13,110
Ой, нет, не вы. Старший Джои
00:10:13,360 --> 00:10:14,360
Боже мой!
00:10:14,610 --> 00:10:18,820
Вы гораздо симпатичнее,
чем на фотографиях
00:10:19,780 --> 00:10:23,000
Я - Ронни
00:10:24,580 --> 00:10:27,250
Сырных подушечек?
00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:30,630
Джои как раз хватил удар
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:33,670
А я, пожалуй, возьму
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:42,260
Большинство людей, которые
хоронят домашних любимцев...
00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:45,140
...просят положить их так,
как будто те спят
00:10:45,390 --> 00:10:48,600
Но бывают чудаки, которые
хотят какую-нибудь позу
00:10:48,850 --> 00:10:51,980
Например, гоняться за хвостом
00:10:52,230 --> 00:10:56,490
Или ловить летающую тарелку
00:10:56,740 --> 00:11:01,620
Джои, если я умру первым,
я хочу позу поиска ключей
00:11:01,990 --> 00:11:03,540
Хорошо сказал!
00:11:03,790 --> 00:11:06,790
Привет, папа. У нас Ронни
00:11:08,460 --> 00:11:10,540
Привет, лапочка!
00:11:10,790 --> 00:11:14,210
Как ты сюда попала?
00:11:14,460 --> 00:11:16,050
Ты оставил у меня свои волосы
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:20,220
Я подумала, они тебе пригодятся
для встречи
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:24,100
Спасибо
00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:28,690
Ну что, в домино? Как раз четверо
00:11:31,610 --> 00:11:32,860
Слушай, мне...
00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:34,610
Не надо было мне приходить
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:37,240
Мне пора.
А то пропущу последний поезд
00:11:37,490 --> 00:11:39,530
Нет, не надо тебе идти
на поезд так поздно
00:11:39,780 --> 00:11:43,120
- И где же мне остаться? Здесь?
- Ага!
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:45,830
Мы поедем в гостиницу
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:48,750
Поедем в гостиницу
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,790
- Нет, не поедете.
- Нет, не поедем.
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,840
Если вы поедете в гостиницу,
вы там... будете безобразничать
00:11:54,090 --> 00:11:57,010
А я хочу присмотреть за вами,
так что оставайтесь здесь
00:11:57,260 --> 00:11:58,880
Ты будешь за нами присматривать?
00:11:59,130 --> 00:11:59,970
Именно, уважаемый!
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:02,890
Мне плевать, сколько вам лет.
Пока вы у меня в доме...
00:12:03,140 --> 00:12:07,100
...будете жить по моим правилам
00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:12,480
То есть никаких ночных забав
с подружкой
00:12:12,730 --> 00:12:15,610
Ого, какой он строгий
00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:17,070
Папа, ты будешь спать
у меня в комнате
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:20,360
Ронни, вы можете спать
у Чендлера
00:12:20,610 --> 00:12:22,910
Спасибо. Какой хороший сын
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,740
Идем. Покажу вам свою комнату
00:12:26,870 --> 00:12:32,330
Странно не слышать после этого
"Нет, спасибо, уже поздно!"
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:38,420
Это только на сегодня.
Завтра ты должен все изменить
00:12:38,670 --> 00:12:41,180
- Шести лет уже хватит!
- Что изменить?
00:12:41,430 --> 00:12:43,390
- Или порви с Ронни...
- Я не могу!
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,640
Или разберись с мамой!
Так неправильно!
00:12:46,890 --> 00:12:51,060
Не хочу ничего слышать!
А ну пошел в мою комнату!
00:13:03,610 --> 00:13:06,740
Эй, дрыгоножка!
00:13:07,910 --> 00:13:08,790
Что ты делаешь?
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,410
Устраиваюсь поудобнее
00:13:10,660 --> 00:13:15,080
- Я не привык спать в трусах.
- А придется.
00:13:20,380 --> 00:13:21,670
Я тут подумал...
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:26,760
...обо всех этих кучах девушек,
что у меня были...
00:13:28,180 --> 00:13:31,810
Они были складированы штабелями,
или стопкой, как блины?
00:13:32,060 --> 00:13:35,060
Не притворяйся, что не понял.
Я обо всех своих подружках
00:13:35,310 --> 00:13:38,110
Я думал, что когда появится
та самая...
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:41,650
...я успокоюсь и не буду
кидаться на всех подряд
00:13:41,900 --> 00:13:44,280
А теперь смотрю на папу и думаю...
00:13:44,530 --> 00:13:47,580
Ты - не он, ты - сам по себе
00:13:47,830 --> 00:13:52,870
Когда тебя тащили в отцовскую фирму
по сантехнике, ты же не поддался?
00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:57,080
Нет. Ты выбрал жизнь
безработного актера
00:13:57,500 --> 00:14:00,300
Это было нелегко, но ты смог
00:14:00,550 --> 00:14:03,470
И я хочу верить, что когда наконец
появится та самая женщина...
00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,590
...у тебя хватит мужества сказать:
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:08,800
"Спасибо, но я женат."
00:14:14,060 --> 00:14:16,310
Ты правда так думаешь?
00:14:16,560 --> 00:14:17,610
Да, правда
00:14:17,860 --> 00:14:20,980
- Спасибо, Чендлер.
- Да иди ты!
00:14:33,490 --> 00:14:34,580
Чем могу помочь?
00:14:34,830 --> 00:14:40,210
Джои сказал, я могу помыться в вашем
душе, поскольку в нашем - Чендлер
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:42,170
Ладно. А вы кто?
00:14:42,420 --> 00:14:45,040
Ой, я Ронни. Ронни Рапалоно
00:14:45,290 --> 00:14:47,670
Любовница!
00:14:49,420 --> 00:14:51,010
- Заходите.
- Спасибо.
00:14:51,260 --> 00:14:53,180
Привет, я Рэйчел. Ванная там
00:14:53,430 --> 00:14:54,390
Скажите, Ронни...
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:57,220
А Чендлер уже давно в душе?
00:14:57,470 --> 00:14:59,810
Наверное, минут пять
00:15:00,060 --> 00:15:02,770
Отлично
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:04,980
Пристегните ремни...
00:15:05,230 --> 00:15:08,400
...заходим на пиписку!
00:15:12,860 --> 00:15:14,490
Привет, мистер Триб
00:15:14,740 --> 00:15:17,620
Привет, лапочка
00:15:17,910 --> 00:15:23,420
Ну-ка, Чендлер-дружок,
покажи свой корешок!
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:37,100
- Что ты делаешь?
- Я думала, здесь Чендлер!
00:15:37,350 --> 00:15:42,520
Ты должен был быть там,
чтобы я увидела твою штуку!
00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:46,980
Извини, моя штука
была со мной там
00:15:54,410 --> 00:15:55,240
Ну, как дела?
00:15:55,490 --> 00:15:56,570
Хорошо
00:15:56,820 --> 00:16:02,540
Роджер устраивает ужин
и хочет пригласить всех вас
00:16:04,420 --> 00:16:05,330
Что такое?
00:16:05,580 --> 00:16:07,130
Ничего
00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:09,550
Просто, понимаешь...
00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:12,220
Этот Роджер
00:16:12,340 --> 00:16:14,130
Тут, понимаешь, такое дело...
00:16:14,380 --> 00:16:16,140
Нам просто кажется, что он...
00:16:16,390 --> 00:16:17,470
Мы его ненавидим!
00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:19,010
Да, ненавидим!
00:16:19,260 --> 00:16:22,180
Извини, Фибс
00:16:22,390 --> 00:16:25,730
Та-ак. Может, он просто настолько
проницателен...
00:16:25,980 --> 00:16:27,560
...что это приводит вас в ужас?
00:16:27,810 --> 00:16:29,570
Нет, мы его именно ненавидим!
00:16:29,820 --> 00:16:32,530
Извини
00:16:44,290 --> 00:16:45,920
Мама! Как ты здесь оказалась?
00:16:46,170 --> 00:16:48,210
Я приехала дать тебе это...
00:16:48,460 --> 00:16:49,790
...и это!
00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:51,500
Блин, кольцом попала!
00:16:51,750 --> 00:16:54,720
Зачем ты забил отцу голову
этой ерундой...
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:57,590
...про то, как надо
поступать правильно?
00:16:57,840 --> 00:17:00,100
Все было хорошо так, как было!
00:17:00,350 --> 00:17:03,060
Там курица. Положи в холодильник
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:07,690
Правда, Джои, бога ради!
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,110
Стоп. Так ты знала?
00:17:10,360 --> 00:17:12,730
Конечно, я знала. А ты как думал?
00:17:12,980 --> 00:17:15,360
Твой отец не тянет
на Джеймса Бонда
00:17:15,610 --> 00:17:17,450
Ты бы слышал его россказни
00:17:17,700 --> 00:17:19,950
"Я переночую у своего бухгалтера"
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:22,450
Это нормально? Я тебя прошу!
00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:24,500
И как же ты тогда могла...?
00:17:24,750 --> 00:17:27,250
Ты помнишь, каким был твой отец?
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:31,710
Вечно орал. Вечно был недоволен.
Ничто его не радовало
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:35,670
Ни его столярная мастерская,
ни идиотские кораблики в бутылках
00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:37,430
А теперь он доволен
00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:41,800
Это же хорошо. У него есть хобби
00:17:42,850 --> 00:17:46,350
Мама, не хочу показаться грубым,
но...
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,650
...что за чушь ты несешь?
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:53,270
- Что это с тобой?
- Со мной? Ничего.
00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:54,900
Слушай, милый...
00:17:55,150 --> 00:17:57,280
...в идеальном мире...
00:17:57,530 --> 00:18:02,240
...ее бы не было, а твой отец
был бы похож на Стинга
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:04,700
И вот что я еще тебе скажу:
00:18:04,950 --> 00:18:08,330
С тех пор, как у него появилась
эта чучельных дел мастерица...
00:18:08,580 --> 00:18:12,840
...ему так стыдно за себя,
что он стал гораздо внимательнее
00:18:13,090 --> 00:18:15,210
Гораздо нежнее
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:18,090
Как будто у нас каждый день
годовщина свадьбы
00:18:18,340 --> 00:18:20,300
Ладно, поздравляю
00:18:20,550 --> 00:18:22,550
А вот не с чем!
00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:25,930
Потому что все это пошло прахом
00:18:26,180 --> 00:18:30,440
А я хочу, чтобы все было,
как раньше
00:18:30,690 --> 00:18:33,560
Мам, ну извини
00:18:33,810 --> 00:18:37,280
Я просто думал, что так
будет лучше для тебя
00:18:37,530 --> 00:18:42,990
Я знаю, солнышко. Я знаю
00:18:44,410 --> 00:18:46,950
Так скажи мне...
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,710
Ты ее видел?
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:54,300
Да ты раз в десять красивее,
чем она
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:57,430
Как мило
00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:00,520
Я бы смогла ее побить?
00:19:00,770 --> 00:19:04,520
С этим кольцом - как нечего делать!
00:19:07,150 --> 00:19:10,190
- Что такое, милая?
- Да ничего...
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:13,700
Что-то случилось! Выкладывай.
00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:18,740
Да ничего. Все в порядке
00:19:18,990 --> 00:19:20,950
Просто... Просто мои друзья
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,870
У них проблема положительного
восприятия тебя...
00:19:24,120 --> 00:19:25,330
...в том плане...
00:19:25,580 --> 00:19:28,500
...что его нет
00:19:30,590 --> 00:19:32,550
Я им не нравлюсь?
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:34,050
Но знаешь...
00:19:34,300 --> 00:19:37,090
...они же не видят все то чудесное,
что вижу я
00:19:37,340 --> 00:19:40,850
Не видят всего хорошего,
всего доброго
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:43,270
Они думают, что ты немного...
00:19:43,520 --> 00:19:44,390
Какой?
00:19:44,640 --> 00:19:47,400
Злобный и подлый
00:19:50,060 --> 00:19:54,190
Но я так не думаю. Я, Фиби
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,070
Я совсем не удивлен,
что они так думают
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,870
Ты не удивлен? Вот я и говорю -
ты такой классный!
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:02,240
Это совершенно типичное поведение...
00:20:02,490 --> 00:20:06,620
...для группы, совершенно лишенной
нормального взаимодействия
00:20:06,870 --> 00:20:09,500
Такая, знаешь,
болезненная привязанность...
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:11,420
...на грани истеричности...
00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:16,800
...все это сидение в идиотском кафе,
с идиотскими большими чашками...
00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:21,600
...на которые, извините,
хоть бери и приклеивай сосок
00:20:21,850 --> 00:20:26,270
И все вы в один голос:
"Определи меня! Реализуй меня!"
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:30,560
"Люби меня!
Мне не хватает любви!"
00:20:30,810 --> 00:20:32,400
Так ты поговорил с отцом?
00:20:32,650 --> 00:20:35,740
Он собирается и дальше
изменять маме, как она хочет
00:20:35,990 --> 00:20:38,530
А мама будет и дальше притворяться,
что не знает, хотя знает
00:20:38,780 --> 00:20:41,530
А моя сестричка Тина больше
не может видеть своего мужа...
00:20:41,780 --> 00:20:44,410
...потому что ей это запретил суд
00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:49,250
Одно к другому никак не относится,
просто я сегодня узнал
00:20:49,500 --> 00:20:53,630
Семейные ценности - страшная сила
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:55,800
Джои, ты как, нормально?
00:20:56,050 --> 00:20:57,170
Да, наверное
00:20:57,420 --> 00:20:59,680
Просто... Знаешь, они же родители
00:20:59,930 --> 00:21:03,140
В какой-то момент
надо просто их отпустить
00:21:03,390 --> 00:21:04,720
Даже если лучше знаешь жизнь...
00:21:04,970 --> 00:21:07,430
...надо позволить им делать
свои собственные ошибки
00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:08,690
И подумай сам...
00:21:08,940 --> 00:21:11,060
...через несколько лет
мы сами превратимся в них
00:21:11,310 --> 00:21:12,690
Да ну тебя!
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,980
У меня на выбор - превратиться
в блондинку-алкоголичку...
00:21:16,230 --> 00:21:18,780
...бегающую за 20-летними пацанами...
00:21:19,030 --> 00:21:22,370
...или стать таким, как моя мама!
00:21:27,250 --> 00:21:29,410
Как дела?
00:21:29,660 --> 00:21:33,580
Все нормально.
Вот, порвала с Роджером
00:21:34,250 --> 00:21:36,670
Да прямо!
00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:40,380
А что случилось?
00:21:40,630 --> 00:21:42,890
Сама не знаю. То есть...
00:21:43,140 --> 00:21:44,640
Он хороший человек...
00:21:44,890 --> 00:21:47,140
...и умеет быть таким милым
00:21:47,390 --> 00:21:50,270
В каком-то смысле он идеально
мне подходит
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:51,520
Просто...
00:21:51,770 --> 00:21:54,480
Я его ненавижу!
00:22:03,030 --> 00:22:04,030
Что тут такое?
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,910
Дайте дорогу фирменному экспрессу
"Голые титьки"
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,500
Следующая остановка - Рэйчел Грин
00:22:15,290 --> 00:22:17,920
Джои, что с тобой?
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:22,010
Извини, ошибся титьками!
00:22:33,690 --> 00:22:36,360
Привет, Джои!
00:22:36,360 --> 00:22:39,110
Привет, лапочка!
00:22:39,940 --> 00:22:41,400
Перевод В.Бродового
Скриншоты



























