Эпизод с новой девушкой Росса»
Описание
На праздновании дня рождения Рэйчел Чендлер случайно признался Россу в любви. Рэйчел едет в аэропорт, чтобы встретить Росса и сказать ему, что она его любит, не зная, что он возвращается с Джули (Лорен Том), с которой он возобновил отношения в Китае и теперь встречается. Чендлер чувствует себя виноватым за то, что посоветовал Россу забыть Рэйчел. Когда Фиби стрижёт Джоуи и Чендлера, Моника тоже хочет подстричься. Фиби сначала отказывается, зная одержимый перфекционизм Моники, но в конце концов уступает. Она неправильно понимает желания Моники и делает ей стрижку, как у Дадли Мура, а не как у Деми Мур. Джоуи отправляет Чендлера к своему портному за новым костюмом, но во время измерения длины его штанин мужчина неподобающим образом прикасается к Чендлеру. Чендлер рассказывает об этом Джоуи, который наивно полагает, что это обычная процедура. Постоянные разговоры Росса о Джули расстраивают Рэйчел, которая проводит ночь со своим бывшим возлюбленным Паоло.
Субтитры
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00:00:58,300 --> 00:01:01,470
Oh, my God.
00:01:01,890 --> 00:01:05,390
Oh, my--Excuse me. Move, move,
move! Emergency, please!
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:07,020
Excuse me, excuse me.
00:01:08,650 --> 00:01:10,060
[YELLS]
00:01:13,860 --> 00:01:15,900
-Rach!
- Ah!
00:01:16,070 --> 00:01:17,530
There you are!
00:01:17,700 --> 00:01:19,620
ROSS: Hey!
-Hi!
00:01:19,820 --> 00:01:22,830
Oh! So, so.
00:01:22,990 --> 00:01:25,790
How was China? You!
00:01:26,410 --> 00:01:29,330
It was-- It was great.
Oh, what happened?
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:31,250
-What? I am?
-You're bleeding.
00:01:31,420 --> 00:01:33,050
-God.
-Oh, look at that! Yes, I am. Heh.
00:01:33,210 --> 00:01:36,300
Enough about me,
Mr. Back From The Orient!
00:01:36,470 --> 00:01:40,140
Come on, I wanna hear everything.
Everything!
00:01:41,470 --> 00:01:44,100
Well, uh, where do I start? Um....
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:48,440
This is Julie.
Uh, Julie, this is Rachel.
00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:51,270
Hi. Heh.
00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:53,480
Uh, oh! These are....
00:01:53,650 --> 00:01:56,280
-These are-- Aren't for you.
-Oh.
00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:59,280
Heh. Uh, these are for you.
00:01:59,450 --> 00:02:02,320
[SLOWLY]
Welcome to our country.
00:02:04,330 --> 00:02:07,700
[SLOWLY]
Thank you. I'm from New York.
00:02:08,210 --> 00:02:10,000
[LAUGHS]
00:02:10,170 --> 00:02:13,710
Well, not a problem.
We'll use them to stop the bleeding.
00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:16,840
Okay. Uh, baggage claim?
00:02:17,010 --> 00:02:18,510
-Okay.
-Okay.
00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:26,470
-No way.
-I'm telling you, she went to the airport.
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:28,430
And she's gonna go for it with Ross.
00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:32,650
Oh, my God. This is huge. This....
00:02:32,810 --> 00:02:35,070
This is bigger than huge.
This is....
00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:37,320
All right, what's bigger than huge?
00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:40,860
-Um, this?
-Yes.
00:02:41,820 --> 00:02:43,450
Guys, you got new haircuts!
00:02:43,620 --> 00:02:45,780
Yes, yes, we did.
Thanks to Vidal Buffay.
00:02:45,950 --> 00:02:47,540
[CHUCKLES]
00:02:47,700 --> 00:02:48,750
Because, you know:
00:02:48,910 --> 00:02:51,250
[lN LOW VOICE] "lf you don't
look good, we don't look good."
00:02:51,420 --> 00:02:53,500
[lN NORMAL VOICE]
I love that voice! Ha, ha.
00:02:54,380 --> 00:02:56,500
-You guys!
-Oh, oh.
00:02:56,670 --> 00:02:59,090
Airport. Airport. Ross.
00:02:59,260 --> 00:03:00,760
Not-- Not alone.
00:03:00,930 --> 00:03:04,050
Julie. Arm around her!
00:03:04,220 --> 00:03:07,890
Unh! Cramp! Cramp! Cramp!
00:03:08,060 --> 00:03:10,680
Okay, I think she's trying
to tell us something.
00:03:10,850 --> 00:03:13,020
Quick, get the verbs.
00:03:13,190 --> 00:03:15,440
-Ow.
-You! You!
00:03:15,610 --> 00:03:17,110
You said he liked me!
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:18,820
You! You--!
00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:21,450
You slowpokes!
00:03:21,610 --> 00:03:24,490
That's all right, Rach.
We got the bags. Uh....
00:03:24,660 --> 00:03:26,580
Hi. Hello.
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,790
Julie, this is my sister, Monica.
This is Chandler.
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,870
-Hey.
-Phoebe, hi. Mwah.
00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:34,960
-Joey, what up?
-Hey.
00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:38,710
-Everyone, this is Julie.
-Julie.
00:03:39,090 --> 00:03:41,170
ALL:
Oh.
00:03:42,930 --> 00:03:44,930
ALL:
Hi!
00:03:45,090 --> 00:03:47,180
Hi! But I'm not here,
you haven't met me.
00:03:47,350 --> 00:03:50,890
I'll make a better impression when
I don't have 20 hours of plane on me.
00:03:51,060 --> 00:03:53,060
- And bus.
-Oh, my God!
00:03:53,230 --> 00:03:55,440
-With the screaming guy--
-And the spitting.
00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:57,730
ROSS:
You gotta hear this story.
00:03:57,900 --> 00:04:00,030
We're on this bus
that's 200 years old.
00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:01,860
Two hundred, at least.
00:04:02,030 --> 00:04:05,490
-And this guy--
-And the chicken poops in her lap! Ha!
00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:12,830
Oh, I'm so sorry.
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,210
I just gave away the ending, didn't I?
00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,670
Ugh, I just heard this story in the cab...
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:21,670
...and it is all I can think about.
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,800
This is amazing. I mean, how--?
00:04:26,970 --> 00:04:30,060
-How did this happen?
-Ross and I were in grad school together.
00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:33,480
We haven't seen each other since then.
I land in China...
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:36,940
-...guess who's in charge of the dig?
-Julie!
00:04:38,610 --> 00:04:39,980
Julie. lsn't that great?
00:04:40,570 --> 00:04:45,200
Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch,
spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:49,320
It's an expression.
00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:52,200
We just wanted to say a quick hi.
00:04:52,370 --> 00:04:54,960
-Then we're gonna go see the baby.
-Then get some sleep.
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:57,540
Yeah, it's 6:00 tomorrow night, our time.
00:04:57,710 --> 00:04:59,840
Well don't tell us
what's gonna happen, though
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,800
Because I like to be surprised.
00:05:05,970 --> 00:05:07,720
RACHEL: Bye!
ROSS: Bye.
00:05:18,310 --> 00:05:20,480
-Rach. Can I get some coffee? Thank you.
-Sure.
00:05:20,650 --> 00:05:22,360
-Hey, Rach--
-Did you talk to him yet?
00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:24,440
-No.
-Then, no.
00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:39,330
So, what the hell happened
to you in China?
00:05:39,500 --> 00:05:42,670
I mean, when last we left you,
you were in love with, you know.
00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:45,090
I know. I know I was.
00:05:45,260 --> 00:05:47,920
But there was always this voice
inside that kept saying:
00:05:48,090 --> 00:05:52,180
"lt's never gonna happen. Move on."
You know whose voice that was?
00:05:52,930 --> 00:05:54,260
God?
00:05:55,220 --> 00:05:56,850
It was you, pal.
00:05:57,850 --> 00:05:59,690
Well, maybe it was God doing me.
00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:05,110
You were right. She looks at me
and sees a friend. That's all.
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:07,990
And then I met Julie, and....
00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:09,990
I don't know. We're having a great time.
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:14,450
I never would have gone for it with her,
if it hadn't been for you.
00:06:15,870 --> 00:06:18,290
Well, you owe me one, big guy.
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,420
-Here's your lemonade.
-I didn't order lemonade.
00:06:21,580 --> 00:06:24,500
Oh. Well then you better go
take that back.
00:06:24,670 --> 00:06:26,250
They're gonna charge you for that.
00:06:26,420 --> 00:06:28,920
-But--
-Go, go, go! Come on, come on!
00:06:30,470 --> 00:06:33,220
Okay, so, uh, what did you find out?
00:06:34,010 --> 00:06:37,060
He said....
00:06:40,230 --> 00:06:42,520
He said they're having a great time.
00:06:42,690 --> 00:06:45,020
-I'm sorry.
-What?
00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:47,860
But the silver lining,
if you wanna see it...
00:06:48,030 --> 00:06:51,490
...is that he made this decision
all by himself...
00:06:51,660 --> 00:06:54,660
...without any outside help whatsoever.
00:06:55,450 --> 00:06:57,830
How is that a silver lining?
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,620
You have to really wanna see it.
00:07:03,210 --> 00:07:04,790
[CHEERlNG ON TV]
00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:09,090
Ironically, these guys
were picked last in gym.
00:07:10,170 --> 00:07:11,760
Hey, Pheebs.
00:07:11,930 --> 00:07:14,800
-You know what I'm thinking?
-Oh, okay.
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:20,350
How...
00:07:20,520 --> 00:07:23,230
...it's been so long
since you've had sex...
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:25,940
...you're wondering
if they've changed it?
00:07:27,110 --> 00:07:30,740
No. Although now
that's what I'm thinking.
00:07:32,110 --> 00:07:33,860
So, what were you thinking?
00:07:34,030 --> 00:07:36,490
I was thinking
you gave the guys great haircuts.
00:07:36,660 --> 00:07:38,200
I thought you'd like to do mine.
00:07:38,370 --> 00:07:40,080
Oh! No.
00:07:41,620 --> 00:07:44,330
-Why not?
-Because I'm just....
00:07:44,500 --> 00:07:48,040
I'm incredibly anal and
an unbelievable control freak.
00:07:48,210 --> 00:07:49,750
No, you're not.
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:51,800
I know I'm not, but you are.
00:07:52,260 --> 00:07:54,090
I was trying to spare your feelings.
00:07:54,260 --> 00:07:55,720
[PHONE RINGS]
00:07:55,890 --> 00:07:58,050
Hello? Oh, hi.
00:07:58,220 --> 00:08:01,100
Yeah, hold on a second.
Ross, Julie for you.
00:08:04,730 --> 00:08:06,440
ROSS:
Hello? Hi.
00:08:07,230 --> 00:08:09,770
Hey. Anybody know a good tailor?
00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:11,990
-You need clothes altered?
-No, no.
00:08:12,150 --> 00:08:14,860
I'm just looking for a man
to draw on me with chalk.
00:08:15,780 --> 00:08:18,910
Go see Frankie. My family's
been going to him forever.
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,990
He did my first suit when I was 1 5.
00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:23,540
No, wait, 1 6.
00:08:23,710 --> 00:08:27,380
No, excuse me, heh, 1 5.
00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:30,840
All right, when was 1 990?
00:08:32,630 --> 00:08:36,010
Okay, you have to stop the Q-Tip
when there's resistance.
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,440
Okay. Okay.
Sweetheart, I'll see you later.
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:47,650
[CLEARS THROAT]
00:08:47,810 --> 00:08:49,650
Okay, bye. What?
00:08:50,570 --> 00:08:53,440
Oh, that is so sweet.
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:56,990
No-- Ha, ha.
00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:59,240
No. Okay. No, you hang up.
00:08:59,410 --> 00:09:01,120
No, you-- Okay.
00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:04,960
Okay. One, two, three.
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:07,000
Shh.
00:09:07,670 --> 00:09:10,960
Well you didn't hang up either.
She didn't hang up.
00:09:12,710 --> 00:09:14,210
[LAUGHlNG]
00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:17,680
Okay, no. No, you hang up.
00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:20,600
You. You. Yo--
00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:31,610
Sorry, I thought
you were talking to me.
00:09:33,730 --> 00:09:35,360
-Rachel. Heh.
-Sorry.
00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:37,780
-I'll just call her back.
-Okay.
00:09:38,820 --> 00:09:41,370
ROSS: Hi, sweetie. I'm sorry.
We got disconnected.
00:09:41,530 --> 00:09:42,830
No, you hang up.
00:09:42,990 --> 00:09:45,330
Okay, okay, okay.
How did this happen to me? How?
00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:48,330
A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine.
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:51,290
Ross was just Ross. Just this guy.
00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:55,010
Now all of a sudden, he's Ross...
00:09:55,630 --> 00:09:59,760
...ugh, this really great guy
that I can't have.
00:10:00,050 --> 00:10:02,260
Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.
00:10:02,430 --> 00:10:03,600
I know you did.
00:10:05,140 --> 00:10:08,140
Ugh. I'm just gonna deal with it.
I'm just gonna deal with it
00:10:08,310 --> 00:10:09,940
[ROSS KlSSES lNTO PHONE]
00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:13,570
I gotta get out of here!
00:10:16,690 --> 00:10:20,030
I don't care what you guys say.
Something's bothering her.
00:10:25,330 --> 00:10:28,120
You know, I think I was 1 6.
00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:33,040
Please, just a little bit off the back.
00:10:33,210 --> 00:10:34,540
Um, I'm still on "no."
00:10:37,010 --> 00:10:38,920
-Uh, morning.
-Hey.
00:10:39,090 --> 00:10:41,090
Could you close your eyes for a sec?
00:10:41,260 --> 00:10:44,430
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm not falling for that again.
00:10:46,850 --> 00:10:50,100
-What's going on?
-I sort of did a stupid thing last night.
00:10:50,270 --> 00:10:52,060
What stupid thing did you do?
00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:54,110
[SPEAKS lN ITALIAN]
00:10:54,270 --> 00:10:55,860
Ew!
00:11:02,530 --> 00:11:04,530
RACHEL:
Why don't you just go get dressed...
00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:08,200
...then you'll be on your way.
Bye-bye.
00:11:09,410 --> 00:11:11,040
Rachel, how did this happen?
00:11:11,210 --> 00:11:13,540
I don't know,
I kind of ran into him last night.
00:11:13,710 --> 00:11:15,090
-Where?
-At his apartment.
00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:16,800
Is this juice?
00:11:17,420 --> 00:11:21,170
Whoa. And the fact that you dumped him
because he hit on Phoebe?
00:11:21,340 --> 00:11:24,470
Oh, God, I know.
I'm pathetic, I'm a loser.
00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:27,890
Honey, you're not pathetic.
You're just sad.
00:11:28,060 --> 00:11:30,430
Yeah. People do stupid things
when they're upset.
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:33,690
My God, if I had a nickel
for every guy I wish I hadn't--
00:11:37,860 --> 00:11:40,320
But this is about your horrible mistake.
00:11:42,110 --> 00:11:43,910
-Hi.
ALL: Hey!
00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:46,240
-Hi....
ROSS: Sorry we're late.
00:11:46,410 --> 00:11:47,660
We were, uh....
00:11:47,830 --> 00:11:50,160
Well, there was touching.
00:11:53,670 --> 00:11:55,540
-Hey--!
-Oh.
00:11:55,710 --> 00:11:58,210
-Hey, Ross!
-Paolo. Ha.
00:11:58,380 --> 00:11:59,710
What a....
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:03,300
What, uh--?
What are you doing here?
00:12:03,470 --> 00:12:05,300
-I do Raquel.
- Ah.
00:12:11,680 --> 00:12:13,480
So, uh, he's back?
00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:16,230
Yeah, he's back. ls that a problem?
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:17,860
No, not a problem.
00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:20,360
Good. Glad it's not a problem.
00:12:20,530 --> 00:12:23,900
Okay, you're gonna
have to not touch my ass.
00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:31,450
Well, despite the yummy bagels
and palpable tension...
00:12:31,620 --> 00:12:33,580
...I've got pants that need to be altered.
00:12:33,750 --> 00:12:37,290
Oh, when you see Frankie,
tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello.
00:12:37,460 --> 00:12:39,130
He'll know what it means.
00:12:41,460 --> 00:12:44,220
You sure he's gonna be able
to crack that code?
00:12:45,510 --> 00:12:49,640
It's funny. The last time Paolo was here,
my hair was so much shorter and cuter.
00:12:50,310 --> 00:12:52,390
All right. Okay.
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:57,060
But-- But! You have to promise that you
will not be all controlly and bossy...
00:12:57,230 --> 00:13:00,020
...and all, you know, Monica about it.
00:13:00,650 --> 00:13:01,730
I promise.
00:13:01,900 --> 00:13:03,570
All right, let's see.
00:13:03,740 --> 00:13:07,910
Now, some of you are gonna get cut
and some of you aren't.
00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:11,280
But I promise,
none of you will feel a thing.
00:13:12,580 --> 00:13:13,950
Okay.
00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:28,380
-All right, that's it. I quit.
-What? I didn't say anything!
00:13:28,550 --> 00:13:32,310
Yeah, but this isn't the face of
a person who trusts a person.
00:13:32,470 --> 00:13:35,390
This is the face of
a person who, you know...
00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:37,690
...doesn't trust a person.
00:13:38,810 --> 00:13:40,480
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Phoebe.
00:13:40,650 --> 00:13:44,400
It's just a little shorter
than what we had discussed.
00:13:44,570 --> 00:13:48,070
Would you relax?
I know what I am doing.
00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,870
This is how he wears it.
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:55,450
-How who wears it?
-Demi Moore.
00:13:55,660 --> 00:13:58,500
Heh. Demi Moore is not a he.
00:13:58,710 --> 00:14:01,420
Well, he was a he
in Arthur and in 10.
00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:05,130
That's Dudley Moore!
00:14:05,300 --> 00:14:08,090
I said I wanted it like Demi Moore!
00:14:08,260 --> 00:14:10,970
-Oh. Oh!
-Oh, my God!
00:14:11,800 --> 00:14:14,140
-Oh, God!
-Oh, my God!
00:14:14,310 --> 00:14:16,680
Oh, my God! I'm sorry!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
00:14:16,850 --> 00:14:18,230
Which one is Demi Moore?
00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:23,270
She's the actress that was in
Disclosure, lndecent Proposal, Ghost!
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,110
Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.
00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:27,490
-I know!
-Oh, my God!
00:14:33,990 --> 00:14:35,950
How long do you want the cuffs?
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,870
At least as long as I have the pants.
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:44,460
I just got that.
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,840
Okay. Now we'll do your inseam.
00:14:50,010 --> 00:14:51,680
[CLEARS THROAT]
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,020
How is she?
00:15:05,690 --> 00:15:07,610
It's too soon to tell.
00:15:08,860 --> 00:15:11,360
She's resting, which is a good sign.
00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:15,280
-How's the hair?
-I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross.
00:15:15,450 --> 00:15:17,200
It doesn't look good.
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:22,290
I put a clip on one side, which seems
to have stopped the curling.
00:15:24,170 --> 00:15:25,290
Can we see her?
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,000
Your hair looks too good.
It would upset her.
00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:31,380
Ross, why don't you come on in.
00:15:38,470 --> 00:15:40,980
-Well, how you doing?
-I'm okay.
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:43,600
-Ooh, that bad, huh?
-What?
00:15:43,770 --> 00:15:47,270
Look, I can sense when women
are depressed and vulnerable.
00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:49,940
It's one of my gifts. Sit.
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:52,780
Ugh.
00:15:53,820 --> 00:15:57,950
Ugh, Joey, when I saw him
get off that plane with her...
00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:01,410
...I really thought I just hit rock bottom.
00:16:01,580 --> 00:16:05,120
But today, it's like there's rock bottom...
00:16:05,290 --> 00:16:07,250
...50 feet of crap...
00:16:07,420 --> 00:16:09,340
...then me.
00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:11,920
You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
00:16:12,090 --> 00:16:15,220
Oh, come on, how can I just tell him?
What about Julie?
00:16:15,390 --> 00:16:18,260
What about her? They've only
been going out for two weeks.
00:16:18,430 --> 00:16:21,720
Ross has been in love
with you for 1 0 years.
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:25,100
-I don't know. I don't know.
-Look, Rach, Rach.
00:16:25,270 --> 00:16:27,690
I've been with my share of women.
00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:31,230
I've been with a lot
of people's share of women.
00:16:32,190 --> 00:16:33,820
But the point is...
00:16:33,990 --> 00:16:38,120
...I've never felt about anyone
the way Ross felt about you.
00:16:40,410 --> 00:16:41,660
Really?
00:16:48,380 --> 00:16:50,090
Yo, paisan.
00:16:52,670 --> 00:16:54,800
Can I talk to you for a sec?
00:16:58,220 --> 00:16:59,800
Your tailor...
00:17:00,010 --> 00:17:02,390
...is a very bad man!
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:07,730
-Frankie? What are you talking about?
-Hey, what's going on?
00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:14,440
Joey's tailor...
00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:19,820
...took advantage of me.
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,040
-What?
-No way.
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,540
I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
00:17:25,710 --> 00:17:27,870
Oh, come on.
He said he was gonna do my inseam.
00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:31,710
Then he ran his hand up my leg
and then there was definite--
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:33,300
What?
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:35,470
Cupping.
00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:41,140
That's how they do pants!
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,220
First they go up one side,
they move it over.
00:17:45,390 --> 00:17:49,480
Then they go up the other side,
move it back, then they do the rear.
00:17:52,070 --> 00:17:55,360
What? Ross, tell him.
Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
00:17:55,530 --> 00:17:57,610
Yes, yes, it is. In prison!
00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,750
What's the matter with you?
00:18:06,910 --> 00:18:08,370
What?
00:18:11,630 --> 00:18:13,250
That's not?
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,970
Oh, my God.
00:18:27,890 --> 00:18:30,270
Even Mary Tyler Moore
would've been better.
00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:34,360
I like it.
00:18:34,650 --> 00:18:36,190
Yeah, I do. I think it's a 1 0!
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,990
[LAUGHS]
00:18:39,570 --> 00:18:42,570
Thank you. My hair is very amused.
00:18:42,740 --> 00:18:45,490
Oh, come on, things could be worse.
I mean, uh....
00:18:45,660 --> 00:18:48,410
You could "get caught between
the moon and New York City.
00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:49,870
[LAUGHS]
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:52,830
I know it's crazy, but it's true."
00:18:55,630 --> 00:18:57,260
Thank you.
00:18:57,420 --> 00:18:59,590
-Well, I gotta go. Bye.
-See you.
00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,050
Bye, Rach!
00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:02,890
RACHEL:
Wait, are you leaving?
00:19:03,050 --> 00:19:05,510
That's what I meant by "bye."
00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:07,850
Well, uh, can I talk to you for a sec?
00:19:08,020 --> 00:19:09,480
Okay.
00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:14,770
When the doctor does
that hernia test....
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:17,070
That's okay.
00:19:20,570 --> 00:19:22,320
-What's going on?
-Um....
00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:26,910
-Well, um, okay, first of all...
-Mm-hm.
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,000
...Paolo and I are not back together.
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:31,960
That was a stupid thing I did.
00:19:32,120 --> 00:19:35,290
If I could go back in time
and do it again...
00:19:35,460 --> 00:19:37,630
...well, I wouldn't.
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:39,760
- Ahem.
-Um....
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:41,970
-Heh.
-Second of all....
00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:44,550
What?
00:19:44,970 --> 00:19:48,220
Before I say anything...
00:19:48,390 --> 00:19:51,230
...is this one of those things
where you break up with a guy.
00:19:51,390 --> 00:19:52,850
Then I tell you what I think...
00:19:53,020 --> 00:19:55,440
...and the next day
you get back together with him...
00:19:55,610 --> 00:19:58,440
-...and I look like a complete idiot?
-No, no, no.
00:19:58,610 --> 00:20:01,990
Okay. Um, well, then,
I think the guy's scum.
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,620
I hate him. I mean, I actually--
I physically hate him.
00:20:07,870 --> 00:20:09,160
You know? I always have.
00:20:09,330 --> 00:20:13,330
And you are way too good
to be with a guy like that.
00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:15,750
-Really?
-Rach?
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:18,540
You deserve to be with someone
who appreciates you...
00:20:18,710 --> 00:20:21,010
...and who gets how funny...
00:20:21,170 --> 00:20:23,670
...and sweet and amazing...
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,970
...and adorable and sexy you are.
00:20:27,140 --> 00:20:30,770
You know? Someone who wakes up
every morning thinking:
00:20:31,020 --> 00:20:34,640
"Oh, my God. I'm with Rachel!" Heh.
00:20:34,810 --> 00:20:37,730
You know? Someone
who makes you feel good.
00:20:37,900 --> 00:20:40,070
Like the way I do with Julie.
00:20:45,820 --> 00:20:48,320
Was there a "second of all"?
00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:51,700
Um....
00:20:52,910 --> 00:20:57,120
No, um, I think that was the whole "all."
00:20:59,290 --> 00:21:00,960
I gotta go. Okay?
00:21:01,130 --> 00:21:03,630
-Okay.
-Thanks.
00:21:04,260 --> 00:21:05,840
Okay.
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,180
No, I swear to God, Dad!
00:21:13,350 --> 00:21:15,480
That's not how they measure pants!
00:21:22,900 --> 00:21:26,490
I was thinking of doing it shorter,
like Andie MacDowelI's haircut.
00:21:26,700 --> 00:21:28,530
-Oh, yeah. Oh, I could do that.
-Really?
00:21:28,700 --> 00:21:31,240
-Yeah. You wanna do it now?
-Great!
00:21:31,410 --> 00:21:33,120
-Okay.
-Okay.
00:21:33,620 --> 00:21:34,870
See you.
00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:37,580
Okay, I just wanna make
really sure this time.
00:21:37,750 --> 00:21:38,830
Uh-huh. Ahem.
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:43,340
Andie MacDowell is the girl from
Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
00:21:44,420 --> 00:21:45,460
No.
00:21:47,550 --> 00:21:51,390
No, no, no, no, no, no.
That's Roddy McDowall.
00:21:52,140 --> 00:21:55,350
Andie MacDowell is the guy
from Planet of the Apes.
00:21:56,310 --> 00:21:58,140
-Oh! Yeah, okay.
-Yeah. Okay?
00:21:58,310 --> 00:22:00,230
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
00:22:07,650 --> 00:22:09,660
[English - US - SDH]
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