Эпизод, где Эдди заселяется

00:00:08,633 --> 00:00:10,843

Casa de Joey.

00:00:11,469 --> 00:00:13,095

Huh? I decorated it myself.

00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:14,972

-Get out.

RACHEL: No.

00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:18,142

Wow, Joey, this is, uh....

00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:20,144

- Art.

- Art it is.

00:00:20,311 --> 00:00:21,770

[CHUCKLES]

00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:24,732

Well, check this out.

Is it a coffee table?

00:00:24,899 --> 00:00:28,193

Is it, uh, a panther?

There's no need to decide.

00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:32,197

Hey, nice pillow.

00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:35,242

So tell me,

is this genuine Muppet skin?

00:00:36,244 --> 00:00:39,413

Hey, excellent water-table thing.

00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:41,874

Thanks. I love this.

But you know what?

00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,209

It makes me want to pee.

00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:48,005

Yeah, me too.

I think that's the challenge. Heh.

00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:52,634

Hey, how come, uh,

Chandler didn't come?

00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:56,722

Well, uh, it's because he had

a thing with the--

00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,057

With the thing.

00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,186

Right. I got it.

00:01:03,605 --> 00:01:05,647

Why don't you show us

the rest of your casa?

00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:06,899

ALL:

Yeah.

00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:10,069

Uh, oh, oh, the best part. Come on.

00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:11,528

[PHOEBE CHUCKLES]

00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:14,823

Huh?

00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,659

Hey.

00:01:18,703 --> 00:01:20,704

Nice toilet.

00:01:21,122 --> 00:01:22,623

No, no, no. Behind it.

00:01:22,832 --> 00:01:25,542

-You have a phone in here?

-That's right.

00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,002

I have a phone.

00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:29,129

In here.

00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:32,049

-Joey, promise me something.

-Yeah.

00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:34,468

Never call me from that phone.

00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,398

[GRUNTS]

00:02:34,904 --> 00:02:36,905

Okay, here we go.

00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:42,369

Sorry, they were all out of apple pie.

Someone just got the last piece.

00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:43,954

[RACHEL CLEARS THROAT]

00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:46,415

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

You are not gonna believe this.

00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:49,459

I have just been discovered.

00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:54,548

Wait a minute. I claimed you

in the name of France four years ago.

00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:56,758

[CHUCKLlNG]

00:02:58,303 --> 00:02:59,386

Anyway.

00:02:59,554 --> 00:03:03,307

Promise you won't freak out

and say how great this is until I'm done.

00:03:03,474 --> 00:03:04,558

ALL: Okay.

-Okay.

00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:07,936

Uh, I just met this producer

of this teeny record company...

00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:11,106

...who said, ahem, that I have

a very fresh, offbeat sound...

00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:14,651

...and she wants to do

a demo of "Smelly Cat."

00:03:14,819 --> 00:03:16,195

[ALL CHEERING]

00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:18,822

Okay, I told you not to do that yet.

Ha, ha.

00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:20,365

Okay.

00:03:20,533 --> 00:03:22,951

And she wants to do a video.

00:03:23,119 --> 00:03:24,453

[ALL GASP]

00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:26,830

I'm not done yet, okay? Ha, ha.

00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:29,458

God. Okay.

00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:33,712

If that goes well,

they may even want to make an album.

00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,800

-I'm done now.

CHANDLER: Oh, that's great.

00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:41,303

MONICA:

That's unbelievable. Oh.

00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:44,890

Oh, God, Ross, if you care about me,

get the pie out of the man's hood.

00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:47,851

-Get the what?

-There's a pie in the hood. Go.

00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:59,112

-What are you doing?

-I'm sorry. My pie was in your hood.

00:04:01,866 --> 00:04:04,326

I have to get the coffee

out of that guy's pants...

00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:07,037

...and I'll be back

in the hospital by 7.

00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:15,545

Damn it, Ross.

Get your butt out of the bathroom.

00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:16,964

[BLOW DRYER BUZZlNG]

00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:19,758

ROSS:

Calm down. !'m blow-drying.

00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:23,303

Blow-drying what?

You have no hair.

00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:25,847

What's going on?

00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:28,558

Uh, your boyfriend has been

in there for an hour.

00:04:28,726 --> 00:04:30,644

It's like I'm living with him again.

00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:33,897

He's here when I go to sleep,

when I wake up, when ! wanna shower.

00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:36,650

Uh, I feel like !'m 1 6 again.

00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:39,736

Well, you're not 1 6.

You're both adults now.

00:04:40,405 --> 00:04:41,947

Get out, you doofus!

00:04:42,740 --> 00:04:44,449

[S!GHS]

00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:47,786

Or, you know,

he's rubber and you're glue.

00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,708

All yours.

00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:55,627

I hope you cleaned your hair

out of the drain.

00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:58,755

[!N MOCKlNG TONE] I hope

you cleaned your hair out of the drain.

00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:00,924

-Shut up.

-Shut up.

00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:02,509

Cut it out.

00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:04,428

[SPEAK!NG G!BBER!SH

IN HIGH-P!TCHED VOlCE]

00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:11,184

I've never wanted you more.

00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:24,656

So, what do you say, boys?

Should ! call him?

00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:29,995

[SLIPPER BARKING]

00:05:31,205 --> 00:05:32,748

You know what they say:

00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:35,083

Ask your slippers a question...

00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,670

...you're going crazy.

00:05:39,797 --> 00:05:41,923

[PHONE RING!NG]

00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,302

-Hello?

CHANDLER [OVER PHONE]: Hey.

00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:46,553

Hey.

00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:49,264

Listen, !'m sorry ! didn't make it

over there today.

00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:50,640

Oh, that's okay.

00:05:50,808 --> 00:05:53,393

You, uh-- You had a thing.

00:05:54,228 --> 00:05:55,896

Yeah, well,

I hear the place looks great.

00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:59,649

Oh, forget about it.

I'm having a ball, ha.

00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,610

How's the apartment doing?

00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:05,280

Oh, hey, it's terrific.

I mean, it's a regular space...

00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,492

...fest.

00:06:09,243 --> 00:06:11,828

Oh, well, great.

00:06:11,996 --> 00:06:13,080

Yeah, I just...

00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:15,916

...wanted to call and say hey.

00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:17,250

[CHUCKLES]

00:06:17,418 --> 00:06:18,502

Well, okay, then.

00:06:18,669 --> 00:06:19,753

[OVEN TIMER DINGS]

00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:21,421

Was that the oven timer?

00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:23,465

That's right, my friend.

00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,760

-It's time for Baywatch!

-Baywatch!

00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:30,722

Oh.

00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:33,308

Can you believe they gave

Stephanie skin cancer?

00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:36,061

I can't believe

they promoted her to lieutenant.

00:06:37,688 --> 00:06:40,399

You're saying that because

you love Yasmine Bleeth.

00:06:40,566 --> 00:06:43,610

How could anyone

not love Yasmine Bleeth?

00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:46,988

Hey. Hey, they're running.

00:06:48,324 --> 00:06:51,201

See, this is the brilliance of the show.

00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:53,328

I say always keep them running.

00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:56,623

All the time running.

00:06:57,291 --> 00:07:00,669

Run.

00:07:00,837 --> 00:07:03,463

Run, Yasmine. Run like the wind.

00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:07,384

But you wanted to live by yourself.

00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:10,303

I did. I thought it'd be great.

00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:13,682

I figured !'d have time alone

with my thoughts.

00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:17,436

But it turns out I don't have

as many thoughts as you'd think.

00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,940

Joey, why don't you talk to Chandler

about moving back?

00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,067

You really think he'd take me?

00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,236

We had a good talk last night...

00:07:26,487 --> 00:07:28,697

...but when I moved out,

I hurt him bad.

00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:31,491

I promise you,

he would definitely want you back.

00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:34,035

I'm telling you,

there's no way he's moving back.

00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:38,498

But we had one of the greatest talks

we ever had last night. Heh.

00:07:39,208 --> 00:07:40,375

I mean, it was--

00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:43,628

It was like when we first

started living together.

00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:46,840

Look, ! know you don't want

to hear this right now...

00:07:47,008 --> 00:07:51,011

...but we've seen him

in his new place. And he's happy.

00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:54,264

He's decorated.

00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:59,227

Look, Chandler, he has moved on, okay?

You have to, too.

00:07:59,395 --> 00:08:03,148

No, you're just gonna have to accept

the fact that you're just friends now.

00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,774

You're not...

00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,651

...roommates anymore.

00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:10,739

Okay, Phoebe. Ready to try one?

00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:12,741

Okay. Ahem.

00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:17,579

[S!NGlNG]

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:20,540

What are they feeding you?

00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:22,709

SINGERS [SlNGING]:

Smelly, smelly, smelly

00:08:22,877 --> 00:08:24,211

Really bad smelling smelly cat

00:08:24,378 --> 00:08:25,587

Oh, whoa! Oh, my God!

00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,884

I mean, like, who was that?

00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:36,097

They're your backup singers.

Behind you, hon.

00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:37,849

PHOEBE:

Oh.

00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:40,769

Oh, I thought

they were just watching me.

00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:44,606

-Like at an aquarium, you know?

-All right.

00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,693

-From the top.

-Okay. Ahem.

00:08:48,861 --> 00:08:52,072

[S!NGlNG]

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:08:52,281 --> 00:08:55,033

What are they feeding you?

00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,743

SINGERS:

Smelly, smelly, smelly

00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,620

Really bad smelling smelly cat

00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,247

It's not your fault

00:09:00,414 --> 00:09:01,498

Okay, sorry.

00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:03,333

I'm just not getting...

00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:05,835

...that everyone, um, gets...

00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:09,297

...how smelly this cat actually is.

00:09:09,465 --> 00:09:11,383

Maybe if we could talk about this...

00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:15,178

...because ! need to feel

that you really care about the cat.

00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:18,431

Honey, we can talk about this.

00:09:18,599 --> 00:09:21,685

It's just that it's costing

about $1 00 a minute to be in here.

00:09:21,852 --> 00:09:24,604

Oh, okay. So, um, the cat stinks,

but you love it. Let's go.

00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:30,110

No, there is no way

he was a velociraptor.

00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,237

Look at the cranial ridge, okay?

00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:35,824

If Dino was a velociraptor,

he'd have eaten the Flintstones.

00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,243

Yeah. Yeah.

00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,036

Oh, were you taking a nap?

00:09:40,204 --> 00:09:42,038

-I was.

-Oh, I--

00:09:42,206 --> 00:09:44,958

Oh, wait, Tony, can you hold on?

That's the other line.

00:09:45,126 --> 00:09:46,251

Hello?

00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,462

Yeah, she's here,

but, uh, can she call you back?

00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:51,172

Okay, thanks.

00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:52,507

Call Joanna. Hi.

00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:53,883

Did she leave a number?

00:09:54,051 --> 00:09:56,386

Did you see me write one down?

00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,931

I don't have her number, butt-munch.

00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:04,269

Well, she'll call back.

Don't be such a baby.

00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:05,812

I'm not a baby. You're the baby.

00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:08,315

-Look, you wanna get off my back?

-Get out of my face.

00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:11,192

Wait, hold on, Tony. Hold on.

00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:13,111

Hello?

00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:14,654

Hi.

00:10:14,822 --> 00:10:17,532

Yeah, no, she's right here.

Um, hold on.

00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:19,784

Hi, Tony, can I call you back?

00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:22,621

That's, uh--

That's my sister's boyfriend.

00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:24,497

Give me that.

00:10:24,665 --> 00:10:26,499

Okay.

00:10:27,543 --> 00:10:31,796

Sweetie, before I forget, did I leave

my diaphragm at your place?

00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:35,258

Hi, Mom.

00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:53,276

Hey. Yeah, ha, ha.

00:10:56,947 --> 00:10:59,282

So, uh, how's the palace?

00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:03,995

It's funny you should mention that

because ! was thinking....

00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,830

What's with the boxes?

00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:10,418

Oh, uh, actually,

I, uh, have some news.

00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:14,422

Is that Joey guy gonna pick up

his moose hat or should I toss it?

00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:19,344

Why don't you ask him yourself?

This is my new roommate, Eddie.

00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:20,679

EDD!E:

Nice to meet you.

00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:22,722

-Likewise.

EDD!E: How you doing?

00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:24,224

Uh, I'll take that.

00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:27,686

It's, uh, what I came for, heh.

00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:31,272

So this is new.

Where'd you two meet?

00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:35,193

At the, uh, supermarket

in the, uh, ethnic-food section.

00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,404

I helped him pick out a chorizo. Yeah.

Ha-ha-ha.

00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:39,864

-It's a-- ! mean....

-Wow.

00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:44,160

We got to talking. And, uh, he needed

a place, and I had a spare room.

00:11:44,328 --> 00:11:46,788

Oh, now it's a spare room?

00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:48,957

Well, yeah.

In that it's not being used...

00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,209

...and I have it to spare.

00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:52,585

Right.

00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:56,881

Well, I, uh, got what I came for.

00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,720

I'll, uh-- !'ll see you guys.

00:12:03,514 --> 00:12:05,140

Hey, Joe.

00:12:05,307 --> 00:12:06,975

When'd you start using

moose in your hair?

00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:09,644

[EDDlE LAUGHlNG]

00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:11,563

Is this guy great, or what?

00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:13,648

Yeah.

00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:15,400

Yeah, he is.

00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:25,243

I can't believe he has

a new roommate. Who is this guy?

00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:27,203

Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.

00:12:27,371 --> 00:12:31,207

It'll never last.

He's just a rebound roommate.

00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:33,918

-Hey.

ALL: Hey.

00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:36,838

Ooh, check it out. Oh, check it out.

00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:40,633

-It's "Smelly Cat," the video.

RACHEL: Oh, God.

00:12:41,218 --> 00:12:45,889

Now, okay, ! haven't seen it yet,

so if you don't like it...

00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,683

...so what?

None of you ever made a video.

00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:54,022

Okay.

00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,903

Get out of here, cat! You stink!

00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,654

[CAT MEOWS]

00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:10,955

ROSS: Oh, smoking.

-Oh, look at me.

00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:13,833

WOMAN [SING!NG AS PHOEBE]:

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:17,545

What are they feeding you?

00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:21,382

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:25,345

It's not your fault

00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:28,223

[UPBEAT RHYTHM PLAYING]

00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:29,724

[S!NGlNG]

Smelly, smelly, smelly

00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:32,852

Really bad smelling smelly cat

It's not your fault

00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:35,855

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:13:36,023 --> 00:13:38,191

-Oh, my God!

-I know.

00:13:38,359 --> 00:13:40,401

I sound amazing!

00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:46,199

WOMAN [SING!NG AS PHOEBE]:

They won't take you to the vet

00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:48,660

You're obviously not their favorite pet

00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,412

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,498

It's not your fault

00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:56,543

Oh, no

00:13:56,710 --> 00:13:59,128

I've never heard myself sing before.

00:13:59,296 --> 00:14:02,006

I mean, except in my own head. Oh.

00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:05,051

This is so cool.

Now ! can hear what you hear.

00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:08,930

Pretty, uh, different, huh?

00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:12,851

Oh, I am sorry,

but I'm incredibly talented.

00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:17,397

WOMAN [SING!NG AS PHOEBE]:

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:19,858

ALL:

It's not your fault

00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:32,537

EDD!E:

Hey, Joey. What's going on, man?

00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:34,080

Eddie.

00:14:34,248 --> 00:14:36,416

-Morning.

-Morning.

00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:39,752

I just, uh, came by to pick up my mail.

00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:43,464

-Where's the mail?

-Oh, it's, uh, over there on the table.

00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:46,217

You don't keep it

on this table anymore?

00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:48,094

No, Eddie likes it over there.

00:14:48,762 --> 00:14:49,846

[CHUCKLES]

00:14:52,141 --> 00:14:55,894

All right, here you go, my friend.

Eggs a la Eddie, huh.

00:14:57,354 --> 00:14:58,521

Ooh. Ooh.

00:14:59,773 --> 00:15:02,692

Oh, oh. That's great.

00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:04,360

JOEY:

Huh.

00:15:04,987 --> 00:15:06,070

What?

00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:08,156

I thought you liked your eggs...

00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:11,659

...with the bread with the hole

in the middle, a la me.

00:15:12,119 --> 00:15:15,830

I do, but, uh, Eddie makes them this way.

They're pretty darn good.

00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:17,290

EDD!E:

Well, you guys...

00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,626

...I'm out of here.

00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:21,419

See you, pals.

00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,087

See you.

00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:29,260

-So how are you two getting along?

-Oh, I couldn't be happier.

00:15:29,678 --> 00:15:30,970

Great, huh?

00:15:31,138 --> 00:15:33,222

I'm happy for you.

00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:37,560

All right, that's it!

00:15:38,687 --> 00:15:42,607

He just comes in here,

Mr. Johnny New Eggs...

00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:46,736

...with his moving the mail and his:

00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:48,905

[AS EDDIE]

"See you, pals."

00:15:51,533 --> 00:15:53,201

[!N NORMAL VOICE]

And now there's no juice!

00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:56,704

There's no juice for the people

who need the juice. I need the juice!

00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,249

There's another carton

right over there.

00:16:02,002 --> 00:16:04,963

Hey, this isn't about juice anymore,

all right, man?

00:16:05,255 --> 00:16:06,339

All right.

00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:07,632

So, what's it about?

00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,759

Eggs.

00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:12,637

Whose eggs do you like better,

his or mine, huh?

00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,556

-Well, I like both eggs equally.

-Oh, come on!

00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,101

Nobody likes

two kinds of eggs equally.

00:16:18,268 --> 00:16:20,436

You like one better,

and I wanna know which.

00:16:20,604 --> 00:16:23,314

What's the difference?

Your eggs aren't here anymore.

00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:27,485

You took your eggs, and you left!

00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,446

Did you really expect me

to never find new eggs?

00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,701

I wanna watch Entertainment Tonight.

00:16:34,868 --> 00:16:37,495

Tough. We're watching

Predators of the Serengeti.

00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:39,998

-Ugh.

-Would you guys stop?

00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:42,125

-It's my TV!

ROSS: What?

00:16:42,292 --> 00:16:43,543

-Quit it.

-Bite me!

00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:44,794

Oh, my God.

00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:46,963

Well, Monica keeps changing

the channel.

00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:50,591

Aw, that's great.

Why don't you tell Mommy on me?

00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:53,886

Now !'m Mommy in this little play?

00:16:54,054 --> 00:16:56,723

Look, ! refuse to get sucked into...

00:16:56,890 --> 00:16:59,642

...this weird little Geller

dimension thing, okay?

00:16:59,977 --> 00:17:02,687

So I'm gonna go take

a nice long hot bubble bath...

00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:06,024

...because you kids

are driving me crazy!

00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,027

[DOOR SLAMS]

00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,319

What do we do about this?

00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:12,530

We could tape Entertainment Tonight.

00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:13,781

Not that!

00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:15,700

This! Us!

00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:18,494

Oh, my God, Ross, it's-- You're just--

00:17:18,662 --> 00:17:21,247

-Since you've been here, you're driving--

-Ow, ow.

00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:24,667

Mon, you've gone ultrasonic

again, all right?

00:17:25,085 --> 00:17:28,087

I just can't stand you being here...

00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:29,505

...all the time!

00:17:29,673 --> 00:17:32,800

Why? Why can't you

stand me being here?

00:17:32,968 --> 00:17:34,343

We're just having fun.

00:17:34,511 --> 00:17:37,180

Fun? You think this is fun?

00:17:37,347 --> 00:17:38,431

Yeah.

00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:42,018

I thought we were fooling around,

like when, uh-- When we were kids.

00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:44,103

I hated you when we were kids.

00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:48,066

-You hated me when we were kids?

-Yes.

00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,484

I hated you.

00:17:49,651 --> 00:17:52,236

I loved you in a you're-my-brother-

so-l-have-to way...

00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:54,405

...but basically, ! hated your guts.

00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:57,200

Why did you hate me?

00:17:57,367 --> 00:18:00,244

Because you were mean to me...

00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:03,873

...and you teased me

and you always got your way.

00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:07,251

That wasn't fun for you?

00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:10,254

Uh-huh.

00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:13,466

I can't believe you hated me.

00:18:14,885 --> 00:18:17,178

But now ! love you.

00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:21,265

And not just because I have to.

00:18:21,642 --> 00:18:22,725

Really?

00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:24,393

Yeah.

00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:28,231

You're just gonna have

to stop pissing me off.

00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:32,110

[CHUCKLES]

00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:34,153

I can do that.

00:18:34,905 --> 00:18:37,156

-Then ! won't have to kill you.

-Ha, ha.

00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:43,121

So you wanna watch, uh,

Entertainment Tonight?

00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:45,164

Yeah, thanks.

00:18:45,332 --> 00:18:47,333

Tonight, America's premier

sports magazine...

00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:48,626

...moves to primetime....

00:18:48,794 --> 00:18:50,586

-You know what?

-What?

00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:53,714

If you really wanna watch

that Serengeti thing, we can.

00:18:53,882 --> 00:18:56,050

Oh, okay.

00:18:56,218 --> 00:18:58,302

[AFR!CAN FLUTE AND DRUMS

PLAYlNG ON TV]

00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:04,433

-Hey.

MONICA: Hey.

00:19:04,601 --> 00:19:07,228

Listen, you are not

going to believe this...

00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:10,857

...but, ahem, that is not me

singing on the video.

00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:13,526

[!N UNISON]

No.

00:19:14,027 --> 00:19:15,111

Yes.

00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:16,779

Well, how did you find out?

00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:21,325

The record company sent this paper

for me to sign saying it's okay...

00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:25,288

...for someone else to sing for me.

That was my first clue.

00:19:26,248 --> 00:19:27,373

So, what are you gonna do?

00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:30,084

I can't work with people

who would do this.

00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:31,460

Sure.

00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:33,171

I mean, this poor woman.

00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,339

What woman?

00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:36,716

The voice woman.

00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:39,886

She has a great voice,

but she doesn't have a video.

00:19:40,470 --> 00:19:42,805

Okay, Pheebs, but what about you?

00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,974

I have a video. Pay attention.

00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:51,022

No, this voice woman,

she's so talented.

00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:53,649

But according to the producer people...

00:19:53,817 --> 00:19:57,528

...they said, like, she doesn't have

the right look or something. You know?

00:19:57,696 --> 00:19:59,947

She's like one of those

animals at the pound...

00:20:00,115 --> 00:20:02,366

...who nobody wants

because they're not pretty.

00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:06,954

Or, you know, like some old dog

who's kind of like stinky and--

00:20:07,122 --> 00:20:09,207

Oh, my God! She's smelly cat!

00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:14,712

Oh, oh, that song has so many levels.

00:20:17,257 --> 00:20:18,549

Hey, Eddie.

00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:20,593

You, uh, wanna play some foosball?

00:20:20,761 --> 00:20:23,512

No, thanks, man.

I'm not, uh-- Not really into sports.

00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,728

Yeah, okay. All right.

00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:32,021

[OVEN TIMER DINGS]

00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,774

Doesn't matter. Time for Baywatch.

00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,776

Oh, what?

00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:38,861

You like that show?

00:20:41,448 --> 00:20:42,615

You don't?

00:20:42,783 --> 00:20:44,617

Ha, ha, what--? No.

00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:47,703

I mean, it's just pretty people

running around on the beach.

00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:50,456

Well, that's the brilliance of it.

00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,627

The pretty people.

00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,755

And the running.

00:20:59,466 --> 00:21:02,260

I'm gonna go read in my room

for a little while.

00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:05,304

Oh, oh. Okay, man.

00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:10,351

[CHUCKLES]

00:22:00,819 --> 00:22:03,738

[S!NGlNG]

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:22:03,905 --> 00:22:05,781

What are they feeding you?

00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:06,991

Everybody!

00:22:07,159 --> 00:22:09,994

ALL [SlNGING]:

Smelly cat, smelly cat

00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,496

It's not your fault

00:22:12,664 --> 00:22:14,040

Monica.

00:22:14,207 --> 00:22:15,624

They won't take you to the vet

00:22:15,792 --> 00:22:17,418

Chandler.

00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:21,839

You're obviously not their favorite pet

00:22:22,007 --> 00:22:23,090

PHOEBE:

Joey.

00:22:23,258 --> 00:22:26,010

You may not be a bed of roses

00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:28,637

And you're no friend

To those with noses

00:22:28,805 --> 00:22:30,097

[PHOEBE CHUCKLES]

00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:35,102

Ross, those are the only lines we have.

Sorry. Okay. Back to the chorus.

00:22:38,607 --> 00:22:40,608

[English - US - SDH]