Эпизод с хулиганами
Описание
Росс и Чендлер вступают в конфликт с двумя хулиганами в кофейне из-за дивана, где обычно собирается компания, один из которых крадет шляпу Чендлера. Затем хулиганы выгоняют Росса и Чендлера из кофейни за то, что те «занимают» диван. Устав от домашних «капучино», Росс и Чендлер решают дать отпор хулиганам. Четверо мужчин уже собираются драться за диван возле кофейни, когда их личные вещи крадут уличные грабители. В конце концов, они мирятся друг с другом, объединив усилия, чтобы вернуть свои вещи, хотя хулиган, который все еще носит шляпу Чендлера, отказывается ее вернуть. У Моники, у которой осталось всего 127 долларов, играя на фондовом рынке, она пытается избежать предложения о работе в безвкусной закусочной в стиле 1950-х годов под названием Moondance Diner, после того как прошла собеседование. В итоге ей все равно приходится работать в этой закусочной, потеряв все свои сбережения из-за неразумных инвестиций. Работа требует от Моники носить нелепую униформу и танцевать на прилавке под старые песни, что её очень расстраивает. Тем временем Фиби несколько раз пытается навестить своего биологического отца, одна из которых заканчивается тем, что она случайно сбивает семейную собаку. Когда она наконец набирается смелости позвонить в дверь и вернуть собаку, Фиби встречает своего сводного брата, Фрэнка Буффе-младшего (Джованни Рибизи), и узнаёт, что их отец бросил свою вторую семью четыре года назад. После этого Фиби и Фрэнк-младший впервые решают почувствовать себя братьями и сёстрами.
Субтитры
eng__.srt
eng__.srt
00:00:04,629 --> 00:00:07,131
Why are we watching
the Business Channel?
00:00:07,298 --> 00:00:11,260
Because the other day ! saw there was
a stock with my initials, MEG, on it.
00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:14,430
Sometimes it takes two or three hours
before it comes up again.
00:00:14,597 --> 00:00:17,349
But when it does, it's exciting.
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:21,061
Hmm, okay, honey,
you really need a job.
00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:22,312
[CHANDLER CHUCKLES]
00:00:22,480 --> 00:00:25,357
Dad says he knows someone
you can call for an interview.
00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:29,236
Right there! That's the third
sign today. Right there.
00:00:30,321 --> 00:00:33,699
On behalf of everyone,
I'd just like to say, "Huh?"
00:00:34,284 --> 00:00:37,661
No, you just said "dad."
And everywhere I go today...
00:00:37,829 --> 00:00:40,456
...I keep getting signs
telling me to go see my father.
00:00:40,665 --> 00:00:43,876
Like when I was walking over here
and I passed a buffet.
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,337
Which is my father's last name.
00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:49,256
ALL [lN UNISON]:
Ah.
00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:51,216
And they were serving franks...
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:53,927
...which is his first name,
minus the "s" at the end.
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:55,679
RACHEL: Yes.
ROSS: All right.
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:59,683
And there was a rotisserie
with a spinning chicken.
00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:02,478
His lndian name?
00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:07,149
No. Because I chickened out
the last time...
00:01:07,859 --> 00:01:11,361
...when I tried to meet him.
So coincidences? I don't think so.
00:01:11,571 --> 00:01:13,864
-Very freaky.
-Eerie.
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,783
Who wants the last hamburger?
00:01:15,950 --> 00:01:18,118
That's it.
Now ! have to go see him, ha, ha.
00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:19,411
Why?
00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:22,831
Hamburger? McDonald's?
00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:25,918
Old McDonald had a farm.
My dad is a pharmacist.
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:27,836
ROSS:
Ah.
00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:16,426
Man, I am so beat.
00:02:16,594 --> 00:02:18,178
Oh, yeah.
00:02:18,346 --> 00:02:20,639
You wanna forget racquetball
and hang out?
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:22,391
Yeah, all right.
00:02:25,436 --> 00:02:28,814
-Hey, you're in our seats.
-Oh, sorry, we didn't know.
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:30,649
Hey, we were sitting there.
00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:33,986
Okay. There is one more way to say it.
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,863
-Who knows it? Ha, ha.
-Ha, ha.
00:02:37,365 --> 00:02:42,077
-Is that supposed to be funny?
-Actually, I was going for colorful.
00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:43,996
-What's with this guy?
-What's with you?
00:02:44,205 --> 00:02:46,748
Uh, nothing. Nothing's with him.
00:02:46,916 --> 00:02:48,375
Enjoy your coffee.
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,009
What just happened?
00:02:58,386 --> 00:03:01,847
I just took your hat.
See, I can be funny too.
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:05,100
My joke is that I took your hat.
00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:07,644
That is funny.
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:09,646
Can ! have it back?
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:10,981
No.
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:14,151
-No?
-No.
00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:16,778
Okay. Okay.
00:03:16,946 --> 00:03:18,030
[CHUCKLES]
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,866
You know what?
I think you're very funny.
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,952
Kudos on that hat joke. Ha, ha.
00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,999
But come on, guys,
just give him back the hat.
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,460
Why should we?
00:03:31,628 --> 00:03:33,879
Because it's a special hat.
00:03:34,756 --> 00:03:37,591
He bought it because
he was feeling down one day.
00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,134
So he got the hat...
00:03:39,302 --> 00:03:41,470
...to cheer himself up, you know?
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:45,557
-Now, Chandler--
-Stop talking. Stop talking now.
00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:49,645
Let me get this straight.
You're stealing my hat?
00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:50,896
You got a problem?
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,774
I just want to make sure
we're on the same page.
00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:58,487
How'd the interview go?
00:03:58,696 --> 00:03:59,988
It bit.
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:03,325
It was a '50s theme restaurant.
00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:07,079
I'd have to cook in a costume
and dance on the counter.
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,581
I was a sous-chef
at Cafe des Artistes.
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:14,294
How can I take a job where I have
to make Laverne-and-Curly Fries?
00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,797
-Don't do it.
-How can I not do it?
00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:18,799
I have $127 in the bank.
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:22,010
Monica, relax. Go get a beer.
00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:23,512
I don't want a beer.
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,138
Who said it was for you?
00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:32,771
BOTH [IN UNlSON]:
Hi.
00:04:33,856 --> 00:04:35,148
What's the matter?
00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:38,527
Some mean guys at the coffeehouse
took my hat.
00:04:38,736 --> 00:04:40,445
-No.
-You're kidding.
00:04:40,655 --> 00:04:43,073
ROSS: lt was ridiculous.
These guys were bullies.
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,200
Actual bullies.
00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:48,203
We're grownups. This kind of stuff
isn't supposed to happen anymore.
00:04:48,371 --> 00:04:50,622
-Oh, hi.
-Hi.
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:52,249
CHANDLER:
Oh....
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:55,043
Oh, no, wait a minute. ! have no one.
00:04:58,756 --> 00:05:01,466
Let's go down there
and get your hat back.
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:05,846
Forget it. !t's probably stripped
and sold for parts by now.
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,891
-Hey. I went up!
-What?
00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:13,437
My stock, MEG, it went up two points.
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:17,858
Do you realize that if I'd invested
my $1 27 in myself yesterday...
00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:21,737
...that I'd, like, have
a lot more than that today.
00:05:23,072 --> 00:05:24,823
You know what? I'm gonna do it.
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:28,035
-Do what?
-Put all my money in me.
00:05:28,202 --> 00:05:31,079
You don't know a thing
about the stock market.
00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:34,207
What's to know?
Buy, sell. High, low. Bears, bulls.
00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:36,251
Yes, Manhattan.
00:05:36,627 --> 00:05:38,712
Telephone number to the stock...
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:41,131
...selling store.
00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:50,015
[PHOEBE SHOUTS AND TIRES SQUEAL]
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:54,436
See? Didn't I tell you these pillows
would be a good idea?
00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:56,897
Oh, God.
00:05:57,065 --> 00:05:58,899
Here we go.
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:02,986
For the first time in my life,
I'm gonna say, "Hi, birth father!"
00:06:03,654 --> 00:06:05,822
-We love you. We're here for you.
-Good luck.
00:06:05,990 --> 00:06:07,074
Thanks.
00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:12,621
Hey, Rach, you, uh,
want some sandwich?
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:15,123
Oh, what is in that?
00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:17,501
Olive loaf and ham spread. No mayo.
00:06:17,668 --> 00:06:20,587
No, because mayo,
that would make it gross.
00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:24,508
Hey, hey-- No, oh, oh, oh.
00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:27,302
-Run, Phoebe, run.
-No, no, doggy, please!
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:31,098
I do so want to love all animals.
Please, no. Back off!
00:06:31,265 --> 00:06:33,433
-You got a bone?
-Are you kidding?
00:06:33,601 --> 00:06:35,727
Look, kibbles! Bits, oh!
00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:37,020
[GROWLlNG]
00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:39,940
Get the hell off my leg,
you yippity piece of crap!
00:06:40,149 --> 00:06:42,401
[PHOEBE SHOUTlNG
AND DOG BARKING]
00:06:42,610 --> 00:06:44,236
[PHOEBE GRUNTS THEN GASPS]
00:06:44,445 --> 00:06:45,737
Ooh.
00:06:47,031 --> 00:06:49,449
Okay. All right. We have a problem.
00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:52,494
Why don't you take his trampoline?
00:06:53,162 --> 00:06:54,830
Okay, here, I know what we can do.
00:06:54,997 --> 00:06:57,374
Hey. Hey. Hey, no!
00:06:57,542 --> 00:07:00,961
Okay, doggy, get the sandwich! Aah!
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:04,631
Go get the sandwich!
Good doggy. Get the sandwich!
00:07:05,174 --> 00:07:08,927
The dog will lick himself
but he will not touch your sandwich.
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,595
What does that tell you?
00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,141
-If he's not gonna eat it, ! will.
-Are you crazy?
00:07:14,684 --> 00:07:18,103
Pheebs, he's just a little dog. Aah!
00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:19,563
[BARKING]
00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:25,902
-Hey.
-What?
00:07:26,070 --> 00:07:28,530
Do you have to be
a Century 21 real-estate agent...
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:31,741
...to get to wear those cool jackets?
00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:36,580
Do you say this stuff to girls?
00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:42,335
Hey, isn't that the guy
who used to wear your hat?
00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:44,337
And look where they're sitting.
00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:46,298
[CHANDLER SlGHS]
00:07:47,341 --> 00:07:51,720
You're joking, right?
You guys just walked through the door.
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,181
-Maybe we didn't make it clear enough.
-Yeah.
00:07:54,348 --> 00:07:57,058
This couch belongs to us.
00:07:57,226 --> 00:08:00,770
I'll tell you what, you call the couch...
00:08:00,938 --> 00:08:03,273
...and then we'll call the couch...
00:08:04,942 --> 00:08:06,526
...and we'll see who it comes to.
00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:11,865
You know what ! keep wondering?
Why you two are still sitting here.
00:08:12,074 --> 00:08:13,825
All right, that's it.
00:08:14,243 --> 00:08:16,036
I have had enough of this, all right?
00:08:16,537 --> 00:08:17,621
Gunther.
00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:20,999
These guys are trying
to take our seat.
00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:25,170
Fellas, these guys were here first.
00:08:25,379 --> 00:08:27,214
-Oh, sorry, didn't realize.
- Ahem.
00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:28,715
There you go.
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:31,176
Thank you, Gunther.
00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:35,805
We didn't want to have
to go and do that.
00:08:37,099 --> 00:08:39,518
He told on us?
00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:40,936
You told on us?
00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:44,397
Well, pal, you didn't
give me much of a choice.
00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:48,401
-Don't play with his thing.
-I know.
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:52,155
All right.
00:08:52,448 --> 00:08:54,866
Let's take this outside.
00:08:56,494 --> 00:08:59,746
"Let's take this outside"?
00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:02,040
[CHUCKLES]
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,501
Who talks like that?
00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:09,130
The guy who's about to kick your ass
talks like that.
00:09:09,298 --> 00:09:11,675
-You had to ask.
-Yeah.
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:17,055
Okay, okay, look. See...
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:21,351
...the thing is,
we're not gonna fight you guys.
00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:23,687
Here's the deal.
00:09:23,854 --> 00:09:28,858
You won't have to, so long as you
never ever show your faces here again.
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:37,158
I think you played
the Gunther card too soon.
00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:45,584
Hey, Pheebs, I think you're good to go.
00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:47,544
Yeah, ! don't know.
00:09:49,547 --> 00:09:50,630
What's the matter?
00:09:50,798 --> 00:09:53,300
I just think that this was
a really bad sign.
00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:56,970
Like the beast at the threshold.
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:03,351
It's just ! have no family left,
except for my grandmother.
00:10:03,519 --> 00:10:06,479
But let's face it, she's not
gonna be around forever.
00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,106
Despite what she says.
00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:15,864
And I have a sister who !'ve barely
spoken to since we shared a womb.
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:18,199
I don't know. This is my real father...
00:10:18,367 --> 00:10:21,202
...and I want things to be,
like, just right.
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:23,246
I completely understand.
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:24,998
Yeah, whatever you need.
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:28,293
Hey, you want to go home?
00:10:28,502 --> 00:10:30,795
Okay, thanks. Sorry again.
00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:33,465
[CAR START!NG]
00:10:36,927 --> 00:10:39,054
[THUD AND DOG YELPS]
00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:46,436
[PHOEBE SlGHS]
00:10:50,107 --> 00:10:52,067
What was that?
00:10:54,528 --> 00:10:59,240
Uh, I'm guessing
the threshold's clear now.
00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:05,497
I want to buy five shares of SGJ. Now.
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:08,208
Come on, time is money, my friend!
00:11:08,376 --> 00:11:11,169
Thank you! Whoo!
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,296
"Time is money, my friend"?
00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,173
You missed
"Takes money to make money"...
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:20,095
...and "Don't make me come down there
and kick your Wall Street butt."
00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:23,848
I made $1 7 before breakfast.
What have you done?
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:27,644
I had breakfast here,
so technically I saved $3.50.
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:30,563
How did you make $1 7?
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,066
Well, my financially
challenged friends...
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:36,653
...I split my money and I bought
some shares of CHP and ZXY.
00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:38,738
How come those?
00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:43,702
Well, CHP because I used to have
a crush on Erik Estrada.
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:48,748
And ZXY because ! think
it sounds "zexy."
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:51,084
Ahem, what happened to MEG?
00:11:51,293 --> 00:11:53,712
MEG was good for me,
but I dumped her.
00:11:53,879 --> 00:11:57,340
My motto is, "Get out before they go down."
00:11:58,426 --> 00:12:01,052
That is so not my motto.
00:12:05,808 --> 00:12:07,642
-Hey.
RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs.
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,060
-Oh, hey, how's the dog?
-Yeah.
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:12,939
Okay. I talked to the vet.
People are so nice upstate.
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:16,609
He said the little fella's gonna be okay,
and I can get him tomorrow.
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:18,403
JOEY: Good.
-Oh, thank God.
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,822
But he did have to have
a bunch of stitches.
00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:24,701
And he said that only once in a blue moon
does a dog's ear grow back.
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:29,038
So still hoping.
00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:35,628
Now are you gonna call your dad
to let him know that his dog is okay?
00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:39,591
I don't want to meet my father
over the phone.
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:42,260
What will ! say,
"Hi, I'm the daughter you abandoned.
00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:45,096
Oh, by the way, I broke your dog."
00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,725
Hey, Pheebs, if you want, I'll do it.
00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:50,018
Okay.
00:12:50,561 --> 00:12:54,189
Listen, just don't say anything
about me, okay?
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,107
Don't...
00:12:58,110 --> 00:12:59,360
...be too long with the phone.
00:13:00,529 --> 00:13:04,324
She'll be a much better friend
once the market closes.
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:07,952
[WH!SPERS]
It's a woman.
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,579
So talk to her.
00:13:12,541 --> 00:13:14,501
[!N DEEP VOICE]
Uh, hello, Mrs. Buffay.
00:13:16,253 --> 00:13:18,671
I know where your dog is.
00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:22,717
I want you to know he'll be returned
to you almost as good as new...
00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:25,386
...within 24 hours.
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:27,764
Uh, goodbye.
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,606
-Why the voice?
-Hard to say.
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:41,611
Your cappuccino, sir.
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,446
Thank you.
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:50,453
-This is better than the coffeehouse.
-Absolutely.
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:01,381
How come it's not mixing
with the water?
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:04,092
The package says to keep it moving.
00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:06,803
Stir and drink, never let it settle.
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:14,102
JOEY:
This is ridiculous.
00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:17,021
After I get back from
my niece's christening...
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:21,693
...I'll go to the coffeehouse with you
and we'll have a cup of coffee.
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,320
No problem. Joey's there, hmm?
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:27,407
-Okay.
-No.
00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:29,284
-No?
-No.
00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:34,414
I don't want to have to have Joey with me
every time ! want decent coffee.
00:14:34,623 --> 00:14:38,084
And I don't want to drink
cappuccino with a "k."
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:41,462
I say you and I go
and stand up to those guys.
00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:44,090
All right, hang on a second there, Custer.
00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:48,136
Ross, have you ever
been beaten up before?
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:49,345
Yeah, sure.
00:14:49,513 --> 00:14:52,682
-By someone besides Monica?
-No.
00:14:53,684 --> 00:14:54,767
So what?
00:14:54,935 --> 00:14:58,438
So we get beaten up. Maybe that's
something a man has to go through.
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:01,900
Like a rite of passage or something.
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:05,236
Couldn't we just lose
our virginities again?
00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:09,115
Because I think actually
mine's growing back.
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:13,202
-I need $1 00.
-What?
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:15,622
Hi. Welcome home.
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,498
-I need $1 00.
-For what?
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:20,168
-To get back in the game.
-When did you get out?
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:23,338
-I lost it all, ! lost it.
-Oh, no.
00:15:23,547 --> 00:15:25,632
I've come to terms with it,
you have to too.
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:29,510
Okay.
00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:33,097
Look, uh, Mon, I'm really sorry.
00:15:33,307 --> 00:15:34,974
Where are we on the $1 00?
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:36,392
I don't have it.
00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:38,394
But ! need it!
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,356
Otherwise, !'ll have to take that diner job.
00:15:41,523 --> 00:15:46,569
You know, with the dancing
and the costumes.
00:15:48,989 --> 00:15:52,200
I don't want to have to wear
flame-retardant boobs.
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,037
Nobody does, honey.
00:15:56,246 --> 00:15:57,830
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
00:15:58,415 --> 00:15:59,499
Hi.
00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:01,000
Noodle!
00:16:01,168 --> 00:16:05,630
Oh, my God. What the hell
happened to my dog?
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,048
It was an accident.
00:16:07,257 --> 00:16:10,468
And the woman who did this
would never hurt a dog on purpose.
00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:12,470
She's a vegetarian.
00:16:13,722 --> 00:16:15,014
Are these stitches?
00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:18,810
Yeah, eight of them.
That's 56 to him, ha, ha.
00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:22,438
If it's raining, you can't
let him look up too long...
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:24,816
...because that cone
will fill up fast.
00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:28,528
Well, uh, thanks for bringing back
what's left of him.
00:16:28,737 --> 00:16:31,823
-Is Frank home?
-How do you know Frank?
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:35,034
Just from a long time ago. !s he here?
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,371
Yeah. Frank.
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:40,623
FRANK:
Yeah.
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,333
What?
00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:45,420
Oh, okay, um, I mean Frank Senior.
00:16:45,629 --> 00:16:46,879
He went out for groceries.
00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:48,840
Will he be back soon?
00:16:49,049 --> 00:16:52,719
He left four years ago.
We're expecting him back any minute.
00:16:53,762 --> 00:16:56,055
I'm gonna go.
00:16:56,223 --> 00:16:58,725
I'm sorry about the dog. Everything.
00:16:58,934 --> 00:17:00,476
I'm sorry.
00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:01,853
Hey, lady!
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,230
Hey, wait up!
00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:12,113
-How do you know my dad?
-Um, well, I don't really.
00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:15,366
Just genetically.
00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,952
He's kind of my dad too.
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:19,454
Heavy.
00:17:19,663 --> 00:17:20,955
Yeah.
00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:25,626
So, um, did he ever
talk about me? Phoebe?
00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:28,379
No, but he didn't really talk
about anything.
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,089
Oh.
00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,216
Except stilts.
00:17:33,218 --> 00:17:35,720
-Stilts?
-Yeah, he loved stilts.
00:17:35,929 --> 00:17:39,891
One time, I was upstairs stealing
cigarettes out of my mom's purse...
00:17:40,100 --> 00:17:42,894
...and, uh, all of a sudden
I look over...
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,897
...and there's Dad's head,
bobbing past the window.
00:17:47,816 --> 00:17:50,777
He just had this big smile on his face
and he was waving...
00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:53,821
...because he was happiest
when he was on his stilts.
00:17:54,656 --> 00:17:57,950
-Wow.
-Yeah.
00:17:58,452 --> 00:18:00,453
I don't know what to do with that.
00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:02,663
-Me neither, ha, ha.
-Ha, ha.
00:18:05,459 --> 00:18:08,795
-So are you, like, my big sister?
-Yeah.
00:18:09,004 --> 00:18:11,923
This is huge.
You can buy me beer, ha, ha.
00:18:12,966 --> 00:18:15,009
-I'm not gonna.
-Oh.
00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:18,888
But you know what's cool?
If you had a friend named Pete, ! could say:
00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:21,724
"l know Pete.
He's friends with my brother."
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:25,478
-I got a friend named Mark.
-That'll work too.
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,230
Cool. All right.
00:18:27,481 --> 00:18:32,318
So maybe, you know,
I could give you a call sometime.
00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:34,195
We could talk or something.
00:18:34,404 --> 00:18:36,405
-Yeah, that'd be okay.
-All right.
00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:37,657
I'm in the book.
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:40,368
-Okay, yeah.
-Okay, all right.
00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:45,623
So, um, stilts, huh?
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:50,294
If you want, ! can show you where
he hit his head on the rain gutter.
00:18:50,504 --> 00:18:52,296
Okay.
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:59,387
We did it. We're here.
We are standing our ground.
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:03,975
-How long does coffee take?
-Would you come on? Come on!
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:07,562
Thank you.
00:19:18,615 --> 00:19:21,033
-There we go.
-I think we proved our point.
00:19:23,203 --> 00:19:25,830
-You burn your mouth?
-Cannot feel my tongue.
00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:32,170
Bullies! Big bullies!
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:35,882
Oh, look who's here. lt's the weenies.
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:40,344
Did we not make ourselves clear
the other day?
00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:41,929
That's why we're here.
00:19:42,097 --> 00:19:44,682
Yes, we're standing our ground.
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:46,851
Apparently.
00:19:47,060 --> 00:19:48,769
-Let's do this already.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa.
00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:50,062
You got a weapon?
00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:53,065
A nice watch.
I don't want to break it on your ribs.
00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:55,443
All right, let's do this.
00:19:55,652 --> 00:19:57,028
[ROSS CLEARS THROAT]
00:19:57,196 --> 00:20:01,824
Question: !f ! don't care about my watch,
can I use it as a weapon?
00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:04,243
-What do you mean?
-It's sharp, it's metal.
00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:07,246
I think I can do some
serious damage with it.
00:20:07,956 --> 00:20:09,916
No, you can't use your watch.
00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:11,292
Okay.
00:20:11,501 --> 00:20:13,878
-Or your keys.
-Okay.
00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:15,379
Here's what we'll do.
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:19,133
We'll put all keys and watches
in the hat over there.
00:20:19,343 --> 00:20:20,551
-All right?
-All right.
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:25,223
All right, come on, man. Let's do it!
00:20:25,432 --> 00:20:28,893
Before ! forget, are we hitting faces?
00:20:29,102 --> 00:20:30,978
Of course. Why wouldn't you hit faces?
00:20:31,188 --> 00:20:34,440
I have to work on Monday.
I have a big presentation.
00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:37,735
Actually, I gotta show
this apartment tomorrow...
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:41,948
...and, uh, this no-faces thing
might not be a bad idea.
00:20:42,115 --> 00:20:44,825
Okay, nothing from the neck up.
00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:46,577
All right.
00:20:46,787 --> 00:20:48,829
Or the waist down.
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:51,499
-Dana's ovulating.
-Oh, really? You guys trying again?
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,167
Yeah.
00:20:53,502 --> 00:20:56,629
Let me get this straight.
We're talking about the middle?
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:58,506
-Come on!
-Hey, hey, whoa!
00:20:58,674 --> 00:21:01,759
You want a piece of this?
I'm standing here!
00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:03,427
-Huh!
CHANDLER: Hey, hey.
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:04,971
Those guys are taking our stuff!
00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:06,389
ROSS:
Hey, hey!
00:21:06,556 --> 00:21:08,891
[CHANDLER SHOUTlNG !NDISTlNCTLY]
00:21:10,477 --> 00:21:12,812
God, that was amazing.
That was incredible.
00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:15,898
-You guys kicked butt!
-Us? What about you guys?
00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:19,026
You really, bing, gave it to
old Mr. Clean back there.
00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:21,570
-He was a big guy.
-Yeah, he was, wasn't he?
00:21:21,738 --> 00:21:24,198
I wouldn't know,
having missed everything.
00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:26,534
Oh, don't do that to yourself.
00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:29,620
Any one of us could have tripped
over that little girI's jump rope.
00:21:32,749 --> 00:21:36,294
So listen, guys, are we, uh...?
00:21:36,878 --> 00:21:38,170
Are we okay here?
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,465
-We're okay.
-Ha, ha, all right.
00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:43,884
Okay, so can I have my hat back?
00:21:45,595 --> 00:21:47,013
No.
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:49,265
Huh.
00:22:00,444 --> 00:22:01,736
RACHEL:
Oh, my God. Look at her.
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:03,362
[PHOEBE GASPS]
00:22:03,530 --> 00:22:05,114
Hi, Monica!
00:22:05,282 --> 00:22:07,033
JOEY:
Ha-ha-ha, how's it going?
00:22:07,242 --> 00:22:08,659
Hey, nice boobs.
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:11,454
Guys, guys. Check this out.
00:22:11,621 --> 00:22:13,914
[CO!N CLINKS]
00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:18,002
[V!LLAGE PEOPLE'S "YMCA"
PLAYlNG OVER SPEAKERS]
00:22:21,798 --> 00:22:23,090
Young man
00:22:23,300 --> 00:22:25,426
[ALL LAUGHING]
00:22:25,635 --> 00:22:29,138
I said, young man
Pick yourself off the ground
00:22:29,306 --> 00:22:30,765
I said, young man
00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,558
Excellent.
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:35,019
To be unhappy
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:45,529
It's fun to stay at the YMCA
00:22:52,871 --> 00:22:54,872
[English - US - SDH]
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