Эпизод с бесплатным порно

00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:10,801

[WHIRRING NEARBY]

00:00:10,969 --> 00:00:13,554

-What is that?

-Treeger's snaking the shower drain.

00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:18,225

TREEGER:

What in the name of hell?

00:00:19,769 --> 00:00:21,937

Maybe he found your flip-flop.

00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:26,608

CHANDLER: Hey.

-Whoa.

00:00:26,776 --> 00:00:28,444

Is this porn?

00:00:29,487 --> 00:00:32,031

What did I do? I must have

hit something on the remote.

00:00:32,198 --> 00:00:33,615

Do we pay for this?

00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:37,244

No, we didn't even pay our cable bill.

00:00:37,412 --> 00:00:39,747

Maybe this is hoe they punish us.

00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:43,667

Maybe ee shouldn't pay our phone bill.

Free phone sex.

00:00:43,835 --> 00:00:47,129

Maybe ee shouldn't pay our gas bill.

00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:52,718

Whoa, hey, that lady's all kinds of naked.

00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:57,347

Yeah, Joey just pressed something

on the remote and it just came on.

00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:01,977

It happened to me once. I eas flipping

through the channels and, bam.

00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:06,148

-It was like finding money.

-Finding money with naked people on it.

00:01:06,816 --> 00:01:09,485

Then I made the mistake

of turning off the TV.

00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:11,987

I never got it back again.

00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:13,280

And I'm sad.

00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:20,913

Why eould he turn off the TV?

00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:16,552

All right, you knoe ehat? Do we really

have to eatch this while ee eat?

00:02:16,719 --> 00:02:18,512

CHANDLER & JOEY:

No, no, no.

00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:22,307

We don't know

what could make this go away.

00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:27,229

Yeah, so no one touches the remote,

and no one touches the TV.

00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:30,566

And no one touches the air

around the TV.

00:02:32,193 --> 00:02:36,572

Imagine a protective porn bubble,

if you will.

00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,534

-I'm at least going to mute it.

BOTH: No, no, no.

00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:46,748

-We still have porn.

-Yeah.

00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:50,210

-Hi.

MONICA: Hey.

00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:51,503

Honey, ehat are you doing?

00:02:51,671 --> 00:02:54,089

-That's too heavy. Give it here.

PHOEBE: Yeah.

00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,259

Oh, God.

00:02:57,468 --> 00:02:59,303

Okay.

00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:00,637

Ugh.

00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:05,309

I'm getting too pregnant for this--

Lugging around a stupid massage table.

00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:07,811

I have to find a job

where I carry a smaller table.

00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:09,938

Or a job where you don't

have to carry a table.

00:03:10,106 --> 00:03:12,024

You mean, like a doctor?

00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:15,694

Pheebs, you're blocking the porn.

Look out.

00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,196

Oh!

00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:18,947

Oh, my.

00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:22,618

Oh, that reminds me.

I have to see my ob-gyn today.

00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,958

-Hi.

-Hi.

00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:32,669

So, uh, Emily just went to the airport.

00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:34,546

Aw. Why didn't you take her?

00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:36,465

Ehh, her uncle had planned on doing it.

00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:40,302

And you knoe, we said

our goodbyes this morning, so....

00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:44,431

You must feel horrible.

Hey, the guys have free porn.

00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,560

No.

00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:51,730

Hey, cheer up.

You're gonna see her again, right?

00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:54,608

Well, that's the thing. I don't know.

00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:57,027

I mean, whenever I brought it up with her,

she said:

00:03:57,195 --> 00:04:00,614

[!N BR!TISH ACCENT] "This is so fantastic.

Why do we have to talk about the future?

00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:03,158

-Let's enjoy--"

-Don't do the accent.

00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,870

You've got to see her again.

00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:08,664

[!N NORMAL VOICE]

Why do you care?

00:04:08,831 --> 00:04:10,165

Because.

00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:12,542

You could get to live out my fantasy.

00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:15,170

You've had fantasies about Emily?

00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:19,675

No. You know, the fantasy.

00:04:19,842 --> 00:04:21,510

Meet someone from a strange land...

00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:24,304

...fall madly in love

and spend the rest of your lives together.

00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,390

Is that why, in junior high...

00:04:26,557 --> 00:04:29,601

...you were the only one who hung out

with that Ukrainian kid?

00:04:30,853 --> 00:04:35,440

Yeah, that, but plus his mom used to put

sour cream on everything.

00:04:37,026 --> 00:04:38,068

Do you love her?

00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:42,364

We said it was only gonna be

teo weeks, you knoe?

00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,200

You love her.

00:04:45,868 --> 00:04:48,370

What is love, really?

00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:50,831

I knew you loved her.

00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,333

You need to go to the airport

and tell her.

00:04:53,501 --> 00:04:56,378

You're probably gonna catch her

just as she's about to go to the gate.

00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:59,548

You're gonna call out her name

and yell, "! love you."

00:04:59,716 --> 00:05:01,967

She's gonna say, "! love you too."

00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:05,262

Then you guys are gonna have

the most amazing kiss.

00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:07,764

Everyone at the gate eill applaud.

00:05:08,808 --> 00:05:10,851

I am a good kisser.

00:05:12,186 --> 00:05:16,064

Then you teo can sneak into the cockpit.

00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,401

Things eill start to heat up.

00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:22,237

And then a stewardess comes in....

00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,907

I've been watching too much porn.

00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:30,954

[BABY'S HEART BEATING

OVER SONOGRAM]

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-Is that the heartbeat?

-That's it.

00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,167

Oh, my God.

00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:37,210

Oh, wow. This is so cool.

00:05:38,087 --> 00:05:41,548

Have ee talked about the possibility

of multiple births?

00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,384

Why don't ee just take care of this one?

00:05:44,552 --> 00:05:47,429

And should I get pregnant again,

I'll hold onto your card, okay?

00:05:48,389 --> 00:05:52,517

No, I'm getting three

separate heartbeats.

00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:56,229

Three? You guys were eorried

I wouldn't even have one.

00:05:56,397 --> 00:05:57,439

[GRUNTS]

00:05:57,607 --> 00:06:00,150

-Doctors are wrong all the time.

-Well....

00:06:01,819 --> 00:06:04,154

Well, so are you sure

that there are three?

00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:06,907

DOCTOR: Definitely.

PHOEBE: Oh, my God.

00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:11,495

-Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

DOCTOR: Ha, ha.

00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:13,789

So in a fee months...

00:06:13,956 --> 00:06:17,209

...I'm gonna have three full-groen babies

just walking around inside me?

00:06:18,836 --> 00:06:21,421

Oh, oh. And it's gonna be like

one of those log rides...

00:06:21,589 --> 00:06:24,132

...when they just come shooting out.

00:06:25,176 --> 00:06:28,595

Giving birth to three babies is not

that different than giving birth to one.

00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:30,347

What do you know?

00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:39,314

-Phoebe.

PHOEBE: Oh! Hi.

00:06:39,482 --> 00:06:40,857

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:43,235

So hoe'd it go at the doctor's?

00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:44,903

Oh, well, okay. Hey.

00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,989

You know how, ehen you're,

um, ealking down the street...

00:06:48,157 --> 00:06:50,951

...and you see three people in a row.

00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:54,162

And you say "Oh, that's nice."

00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:58,500

-Yes.

PHOEBE: Okay.

00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:03,004

Yeah, well, good news.

You're gonna have three babies. Aah!

00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:06,383

-Three babies?

PHOEBE: Uh-huh.

00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,593

Oh, oh!

00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:11,263

I've finally got my band.

00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:16,351

We're gonna have a big family!

I always wanted a big family!

00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:21,940

Oh, God. I'm so glad you guys are happy.

I was so afraid you we're gonna be freaked.

00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,693

-Oh.

-Why eould we be freaked?

00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:29,072

No, because maybe it's harder to raise them

and the added expense. Ugh!

00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:34,035

-Oh.

-Right.

00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,914

No, back to happy. Back to happy!

00:07:39,333 --> 00:07:41,918

No, no, no. It's gonna be fine...

00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:43,545

...because, um....

00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:45,547

Because I teach Home Ec.

00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:50,427

And I can have 30 kids making

baby clothes all year long.

00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:55,182

You know, it'll be like

my very own little sweatshop.

00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:58,894

You know, I've been thinking...

00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:01,229

...ever since you said

that ee're gonna have triplets.

00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:08,069

The best thing for me to do is

drop out of college and get a job.

00:08:08,237 --> 00:08:10,947

ALICE: Frank.

-No, you can't quit college. No.

00:08:11,115 --> 00:08:12,449

You're in college? Really?

00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,494

-Yeah, refrigerator college.

-Yeah.

00:08:16,954 --> 00:08:19,915

Yeah, you knoe, when ee found out

we were gonna have a baby...

00:08:20,082 --> 00:08:24,961

...I figured, you knoe,

I should have, like, a career, you know?

00:08:25,129 --> 00:08:26,963

-And I love refrigerators.

-Yeah.

00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:30,592

You can't give up on your dream. Ugh.

00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:34,721

No, it's okay.

We're gonna have three kids.

00:08:34,889 --> 00:08:38,099

And that's a different kind of dream.

00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:40,018

Three kids and no money.

00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:49,778

WOMAN [ON PA]:

This is the boarding call for Flight 009.

00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:51,780

ROSS:

Emily.

00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,615

Oh, my God. What are you doing here?

00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:57,786

I just-- I had to see you one more time

before you took off.

00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:00,956

You are so sweet.

00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,166

[LAUGHING]

00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:05,752

That's a big candy bar.

00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:10,882

I had the most amazing time with you.

00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:13,802

Me too.

00:09:14,136 --> 00:09:17,639

WOMAN: This is the final boarding call

for Flight 009.

00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:20,976

Well, that's me.

00:09:29,318 --> 00:09:30,318

Here, have this.

00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:32,487

I'm only allowed one piece

of carry-on anyway.

00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,030

[CHUCKLES]

00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:38,159

Wait, uh....

00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:41,955

Listen, I have to tell you something.

00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,040

I've been thinking.

00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:47,836

I'm just going to come out and say it, okay?

Uh....

00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:50,255

I think...

00:09:51,048 --> 00:09:52,674

...I love you.

00:09:55,511 --> 00:09:57,012

Oh.

00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,352

Thank you.

00:10:12,653 --> 00:10:14,779

It's no problem.

00:10:18,242 --> 00:10:20,035

[HUMMING PORNO MUS!C]

00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,206

What is that song

that has been in my head all day?

00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:28,043

It's the theme from Good Will Humping.

00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:33,882

You know who doesn't even like

dirty movies?

00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:37,385

-My new boyfriend Joshua.

-Yeah, right.

00:10:38,929 --> 00:10:42,932

No, he told me he prefers to leave

certain things to the imagination.

00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:46,770

Oh, oh, yeah. Did he also say that he

thought some of the dialogue was corny?

00:10:46,937 --> 00:10:49,314

And that he actually found it funny,

not sexy?

00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:50,732

Yes.

00:10:52,401 --> 00:10:54,402

Yeah, he likes porn.

00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:58,490

Where you going?

00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,951

I'm gonna find out if he really thinks

supermodels are too skinny.

00:11:02,119 --> 00:11:04,120

-Hey, Pheebs.

-Hi.

00:11:04,288 --> 00:11:06,748

BOTH: Hi. Hey.

-Hoe'd it go eith Frank and Alice?

00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,416

Frank has to quit college...

00:11:08,584 --> 00:11:12,212

...because his super-fertile sister

is having three babies. Ugh.

00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,631

I need to make a lot of money really fast.

00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:17,092

And I had an idea

that I wanted to talk to you about...

00:11:17,259 --> 00:11:19,260

...because you work for a big company.

Okay.

00:11:19,428 --> 00:11:20,595

Insider trading.

00:11:22,473 --> 00:11:24,808

What information is there

that you can give me?

00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:27,602

Well, actually, they don't really talk to us

about that stuff.

00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,771

I can get you some free White-Out,

though.

00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:35,360

Huh! Did you do what I said?

Did you tell her?

00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:37,404

-I did.

-And what did she say?

00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:39,072

"Thank you."

00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:43,660

You're totally eelcome. What'd she say?

00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,622

She said, "Thank you."

00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:50,250

I said, "l love you."

00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:53,461

And she said, "Thank you."

00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:57,757

Oh, wait. Did you say you love her?

00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:00,802

Yeah, what were you trying

to get her to do?

00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:03,805

What do I do now?

00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:06,224

You play hard-to-get.

00:12:07,101 --> 00:12:09,644

She already lives in London.

00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:13,189

So you go to Tokyo.

00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:15,984

All right, look, forget it.

00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:19,028

Okay, forget it.

You told her you love her. It's over.

00:12:19,196 --> 00:12:22,282

It is not over. You're over.

00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:24,993

What?

00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:28,663

You know.

00:12:31,041 --> 00:12:32,459

Okay.

00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:35,336

Good one.

00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:40,175

It's not over because she's gonna call you

and tell you she loves you.

00:12:40,342 --> 00:12:43,803

The reason why she couldn't is because her

feelings were so strong that it scared her.

00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:46,055

Noe, you go home

and you wait for her call.

00:12:46,223 --> 00:12:48,683

She could be calling you from the plane.

Come on, go.

00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:53,104

Okay, okay. But if she doesn't call,

it is definitely over.

00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:57,984

No, wait, wait. Unless, eventually, I call her,

you know, to see what's going on...

00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:02,530

...and she says she'll call me back,

but then she doesn't.

00:13:02,698 --> 00:13:05,617

Then it's over.

00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:07,744

Way to be strong, man.

00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:19,088

-Hi.

CHANDLER & JOEY: Hey.

00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:21,341

Listen, can we watch cartoons

on your television?

00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:24,010

We need a porn break.

00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:28,139

We spent the last two hours watching

In and Out and In Again.

00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,976

Well, so why don't you just turn it off?

00:13:32,144 --> 00:13:35,021

Because then ee'd be the guys

who turned off free porn.

00:13:36,732 --> 00:13:38,733

Oh, good, you're here.

00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:39,943

GROUP:

Hey.

00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:41,402

RACHEL:

What you got there?

00:13:41,570 --> 00:13:44,572

Oh, this? Well, I'm glad you asked.

00:13:47,576 --> 00:13:50,203

Noe, don't you hate it

when you have to cut a tin can...

00:13:50,371 --> 00:13:52,705

...with an ordinary steak knife?

00:13:54,583 --> 00:13:56,042

Ha.

00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:57,961

Noe, I know what you're thinking.

00:13:58,128 --> 00:14:00,004

Pregnant woman slays four?

00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:04,384

They didn't make you pay

for those knives, did they?

00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,094

-No.

-Are you sure?

00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:08,012

No.

00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:12,100

You're not gonna make enough money

to help Frank and Alice by selling knives.

00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:13,351

No, no. I know that.

00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:16,479

But I just need to make enough money

for the second part of my plan.

00:14:16,647 --> 00:14:20,066

-What's the second part of your plan?

-My Saturn dealership.

00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:23,069

[PHONE RINGING]

00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:30,451

Hello?

00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,328

Ross?

00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,330

Emily. Hi.

00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:38,543

Uh, hoe eas your flight?

00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,003

It was dreadful.

00:14:40,170 --> 00:14:44,632

Uh, I felt terrible about how I acted

when you said those wonderful things.

00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:48,553

No, no, that's all right. Um....

00:14:49,138 --> 00:14:51,139

I'm just glad you called.

00:14:51,307 --> 00:14:54,809

Ross, um, there's something

that I've got to tell you.

00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:59,063

There's someone else.

00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:07,655

Does that mean the same thing

in England as it does in America?

00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,243

She doesn't knoe

which one of us she wants.

00:15:12,411 --> 00:15:14,329

Me or this "Colin" guy.

00:15:14,496 --> 00:15:17,999

This isn't how it was supposed to go.

I mean, there can't be another guy.

00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,667

Well....

00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,712

Of course there's another guy.

00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,923

Heh. This is even more perfect.

00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,343

Noe you have to prove your love.

00:15:28,510 --> 00:15:32,680

I'm not proving anything, okay?

I'm done listening to you.

00:15:32,848 --> 00:15:35,892

If I hadn't let you talk me

into going to the airport in the first place...

00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:37,936

...I wouldn't have put my fist

through the wall.

00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,687

You put your fist through the wall?

00:15:39,855 --> 00:15:42,231

No, I missed and hit the door.

00:15:43,817 --> 00:15:45,526

But it opened really hard.

00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:49,530

-You have to go to London.

-What?

00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:51,366

Yep. You have to go fight for her.

00:15:51,533 --> 00:15:53,368

Oh, yeah, sure. That makes sense.

00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:56,579

Because you already told her you loved her,

and she didn't say it back.

00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:59,123

Then she called you and told you

there was another guy.

00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:01,209

So yeah. Go to London.

That eill scare her.

00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:06,464

When Rachel was with Paolo,

what did you do?

00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,591

I made fun of his accent.

00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:12,470

You sat back and let him have her.

You didn't fight at all. Am I right?

00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:14,931

You want the same thing

to happen eith Emily?

00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:16,224

-No.

MONICA: All right, then.

00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,060

Go fight for her. Go to London.

00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:21,729

I mean, that could be you and Emily.

00:16:24,733 --> 00:16:26,985

That, but nicer.

00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:28,569

Just go to London.

00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:31,280

-Really?

-Come on.

00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:35,326

Surprise her. Show up at her doorstep.

Don't let her go without a fight.

00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:39,580

-All right. All right. I'm going to do it.

MONICA: All right.

00:16:39,748 --> 00:16:43,042

I'm gonna go to London,

and I am gonna fight for her.

00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:44,961

Okay. Good luck.

00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:48,339

Ross, Ross. If you're going to the airport...

00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:51,509

...can you pick me up another one

of those Toblerone bars?

00:16:58,434 --> 00:17:02,770

Oh, oh, I did it. I did it.

I figured out a way to make money.

00:17:02,938 --> 00:17:06,065

I'm gonna open up my own massage place

and Frank's gonna help me.

00:17:06,233 --> 00:17:09,402

And we can work it around his schedule,

so he doesn't have to quit school.

00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:11,029

La-la-la.

00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:14,365

That sounds great.

But how can you afford it?

00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,034

We eere walking down the street...

00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,036

...and we sae that van

you used for catering.

00:17:18,203 --> 00:17:20,621

- And we realized--

-I'm telling it. I'm telling it.

00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,500

Okay, you knoe how people

need transportation...

00:17:24,668 --> 00:17:26,919

...but they also need massages to relax?

00:17:27,087 --> 00:17:31,716

So I just figured ee could combine the two.

Okay, I give the massages and Frank drives.

00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:35,720

I can fix up the van, bolt the table

in the back and you know what I've got?

00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,848

A place that no one

will ever get out of alive?

00:17:40,184 --> 00:17:45,313

No, think about it. It's a taxi that

people take when they need to relax.

00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,523

It's a Relaxi-Taxi.

00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:51,611

The name was my favorite part.

00:17:52,571 --> 00:17:55,281

-Well, I came up with it.

-You did not!

00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:57,075

RACHEL:

Oh!

00:17:57,701 --> 00:18:02,455

No. You came up with Relaxi-Cab.

That's not good.

00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:05,416

[PHONE RINGS]

00:18:06,210 --> 00:18:07,543

-Hello?

ROSS [OVER PHONE]: Hey.

00:18:07,711 --> 00:18:11,214

Oh, my God. Ross, are you in England?

Was Emily surprised?

00:18:11,381 --> 00:18:13,424

ROSS:

No, because she hasn't come home yet.

00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:15,635

And she hasn't been home all night.

00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:18,387

She's obviously staying

with that other guy.

00:18:18,555 --> 00:18:22,141

And I'm the stupid moron who spent

the whole night outside her apartment.

00:18:22,309 --> 00:18:24,352

All right, when is the next flight out?

00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,812

About four hours.

00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:29,690

Okay, just stay there a couple more hours.

If she doesn't show up, come home.

00:18:29,858 --> 00:18:31,901

Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi.

00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:35,404

And ask him if he thinks that is better

than Relaxi-Cab.

00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:40,701

It's not Relaxi-Cab.

It's Relaxi-Cab. Like Taxi-Cab.

00:18:41,495 --> 00:18:43,246

Ooh, that is better.

00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:47,708

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,880

Are we in London?

00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:56,008

Why are you doing here?

You can't be here.

00:18:56,426 --> 00:18:58,261

I've come to talk to Ross.

00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,182

What?

00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:07,728

Nothing. No, nothing.

00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:09,730

I was gonna call him--

00:19:09,898 --> 00:19:12,900

Oh, you came to tell him you love him.

I knew it!

00:19:13,068 --> 00:19:15,403

I was right! I'm right, right?

00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:17,989

I'd really rather talk to him.

00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:22,618

I've been to his apartment

and he's not there.

00:19:22,786 --> 00:19:24,620

And I need to talk to him.

00:19:24,788 --> 00:19:27,331

So do you have any idea ehere he is?

00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:32,712

[PHONE RINGING]

00:19:37,342 --> 00:19:39,177

EMILY [ON MACH!NE]:

Ross, are you there?

00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:46,475

Ross, I don't know if you can hear this,

but I'm gonna talk anyway.

00:19:46,768 --> 00:19:49,854

I'm in the States

with your sister and your friends.

00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:52,315

And it's all over eith Colin.

00:19:53,984 --> 00:19:57,195

l came here to tell you that

and to tell you--

00:19:57,779 --> 00:20:00,531

Yes, Joey, you can have

all the chocolate you want. Just take it.

00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:08,372

I came here to tell you that I love you.

00:20:09,499 --> 00:20:10,666

I love you too.

00:20:10,959 --> 00:20:14,420

I'm gonna call you right now

from the phone booth.

00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:16,714

You can't hear me.

00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,635

I wish I could know

if you'd heard any of that.

00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:24,222

I suppose I've either told you that I love you

or given my neighbors a good laugh.

00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:28,726

Mrs. Newman, if you're listening,

bugger off. This is none of your business.

00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:32,438

Suppose there's not much chance

you did hear that.

00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:34,815

And there's the call waiting...

00:20:34,983 --> 00:20:38,194

...so I should go.

00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:40,696

Oh, well.

00:20:42,991 --> 00:20:44,367

Hello?

00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:46,327

ROSS:

Hi.

00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:50,957

Ross, I love you.

00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:52,750

Oh.

00:20:54,711 --> 00:20:56,295

Thank you.

00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:06,430

-Hey.

JOEY: Hey.

00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:10,184

I was just at the bank and there

was this really hot teller.

00:21:10,686 --> 00:21:14,438

And she didn't ask me

to go do it with her in the vault.

00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:17,066

Same kind of thing happened to me.

00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:19,110

Woman pizza delivery guy comes over...

00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:21,821

...gives me the pizza,

takes the money and leaves.

00:21:21,989 --> 00:21:25,324

What, no "Nice apartment,

bet the bedrooms are huge"?

00:21:26,034 --> 00:21:27,451

No, nothing.

00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:31,455

You know what?

We have to turn off the porn.

00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:33,958

I think you're right.

00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,169

All right, ready?

00:21:37,337 --> 00:21:38,671

-One.

-Teo.

00:21:38,839 --> 00:21:40,256

-Three.

-Three.

00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:45,845

That's kind of nice.

00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:49,307

-Yeah, that's kind of a relief.

-Yeah.

00:21:56,064 --> 00:21:58,065

-You want to see if we still have it?

-Yeah.

00:22:00,110 --> 00:22:02,486

Free porn! We have free porn!

00:22:05,657 --> 00:22:07,658

[English - US - SDH]