Эпизод с печеньем Фиби
Описание
Фиби предлагает Монике в качестве подарка на помолвку секретный рецепт печенья своей бабушки, но рецепт сгорел во время пожара. Моника одержимо пытается его воссоздать, но позже узнает, что рецепт принадлежит компании Nestle Toll House. Рейчел предлагает научить Джои управлять парусной лодкой, но вскоре начинает словесно оскорблять его за его небрежное отношение. Ее грубый стиль преподавания заставляет ее понять, что она ведет себя точно так же, как ее противный отец, когда он учил ее парусному спорту. Новые очки Чендлера запотевают в парной спортзала, поэтому он снимает их, и это приводит к тому, что он случайно садится на голые колени своего будущего тестя.
Субтитры
eng__.srt
eng__.srt
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:09,800
So, what do you think?
00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:12,261
- About what?
- What?
00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:16,890
Are you kidding? Okay,
I'll give you a hint. I'll give you a hint.
00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:22,771
Eyes. No, no. Your eyes! No.
00:00:22,939 --> 00:00:24,523
Chandler's eyes!
00:00:25,734 --> 00:00:27,443
I got glasses.
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:30,070
You always had glasses.
00:00:32,907 --> 00:00:34,450
No, I didn't.
00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,244
Are you sure?
00:00:38,788 --> 00:00:40,330
Didn't you used to have a pair?
00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:44,668
They were really round and burgundy,
and they made you look kind of, um...
00:00:44,836 --> 00:00:46,879
- Feminine.
- Yes!
00:00:47,255 --> 00:00:48,297
No.
00:00:48,506 --> 00:00:51,341
I think the glasses look great.
They make you look sexy.
00:00:51,509 --> 00:00:53,010
- Really?
- Yeah.
00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:55,387
You didn't think
I used to wear glasses, right?
00:00:55,555 --> 00:00:56,597
- Of course.
- Pfft.
00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:58,265
[MOUTHS]
I had no idea.
00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:55,948
What do you want for
an engagement present?
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,242
Oh, that's okay, we're not having a party...
00:01:58,409 --> 00:02:01,203
...so you don't have to get us...
- Ah, buh-buh-buh! Heh.
00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:05,457
If someone wants to give us a present,
we don't want to deprive them of that joy.
00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:08,961
Oh, you should get them
one of those little CD players.
00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:10,504
Oh, I already have one.
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:13,882
Unless someone borrowed it
and left it at the gynecologist.
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:20,556
Yeah, and by "someone"
she means Joey.
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:23,350
Hey, I know what I want!
00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,311
- What we want, honey.
- No, you don't want this.
00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:29,982
I want to have your grandmother's
cookie recipe.
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:32,609
You mean the chocolate chip
cookie recipe?
00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:34,611
- Uh-huh, yeah.
- The one my grandmother...
00:02:34,779 --> 00:02:36,446
...made me swear on her deathbed...
00:02:36,614 --> 00:02:39,074
...that I would never
let out of our family?
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:42,870
Dying people say the craziest things.
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:47,833
I've wanted it for years. I was gonna
make cookies for my children.
00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:51,503
Break my heart. Oh, all right.
00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:55,215
I'll be the mom who makes the
world's best chocolate chip cookies.
00:02:55,466 --> 00:02:58,719
Our kids are gonna be fat,
aren't they?
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,264
- Ahoy!
CHANDLER: Hey.
00:03:02,473 --> 00:03:05,184
- How's the boat?
- I'm getting into this sailing stuff.
00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:07,186
You finally took it out of the marina?
00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:09,271
Why would I do that?
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:12,858
It took three guys
to get the thing in there.
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:15,777
If you don't sail it,
what do you do on it?
00:03:15,987 --> 00:03:17,863
It's a great place
to just kind of sit...
00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:21,491
...hang around, drink a few beers,
eat some chips.
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:26,288
It's good that you finally
have a place to do that.
00:03:27,081 --> 00:03:29,374
Joey, I could teach you
to sail if you want.
00:03:29,584 --> 00:03:32,002
- You could?
- Yeah, I've been sailing my whole life.
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:35,214
When I was 15,
my dad bought me my own boat.
00:03:36,674 --> 00:03:38,800
- Your own boat?
- He was trying to cheer me up.
00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:40,886
My pony was sick.
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,399
- You know what I was thinking?
- What?
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:56,944
Nothing, I just like to go like this.
00:03:58,154 --> 00:04:01,323
- Chandler, what are you doing tonight?
- Why, do you have a lecture?
00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:04,785
- No, why?
- Then, free as a bird. What's up?
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:07,746
Uh, my dad wants to know if you want
to play racquetball.
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,623
Wow, that's great! Dad must like you.
00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:12,876
- He doesn't ask just anyone to play.
- He didn't really ask for you.
00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:16,546
He asked for "Chauncey."
I assumed he meant you.
00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:18,632
Did you correct him?
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,426
No, I thought it would be
more fun this way.
00:04:22,887 --> 00:04:25,347
Maybe this is something
you could do this every week.
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:27,015
Or you could sit on the porch...
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:29,643
...and make sure no one
steals the trashcans.
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,937
He does that every week too.
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:36,566
Just so you know, you have to let
him win. He hates to lose.
00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:39,736
Oh, no problem.
Maybe I'll play with my left hand.
00:04:40,905 --> 00:04:42,197
You're not a lefty?
00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,367
Does anybody know me?
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:50,289
[PHOEBE GASPS]
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:51,498
What's wrong, Phoebe?
00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:55,085
I just went to my old apartment
to get you the cookie recipe...
00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:57,796
...and that stupid fire burned it up!
00:04:57,964 --> 00:05:01,883
No! Why didn't you make a copy
and keep it in a fireproof box...
00:05:02,051 --> 00:05:05,012
...and keep it at least 100 yards
away from the original?
00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:13,312
Because I'm normal.
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,691
That was the one legacy
my grandmother left me.
00:05:17,942 --> 00:05:20,777
And I know you wanted it
as an engagement present.
00:05:20,945 --> 00:05:23,113
We have to get you
an engagement present?
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,324
Don't worry about it.
00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:28,076
No one got me an engagement present.
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:32,247
Okay, here.
I don't have the recipe, but here.
00:05:32,498 --> 00:05:34,916
I wish you health
and happiness.
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,961
An old cookie?
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:41,590
See, this is what happens
when you don't register for gifts.
00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:47,429
I made a batch and I froze it.
And this is the only one left.
00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:50,098
- We can't accept this.
- Why not?
00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,101
Because it's gross.
00:05:53,811 --> 00:05:57,064
No, wait. I think I can figure out
the recipe from this cookie.
00:05:57,273 --> 00:05:58,732
I do this at work all the time.
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,442
- Really?
- Yeah, I think I can.
00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:01,985
Oh, yay!
00:06:05,406 --> 00:06:07,282
Okay, Ross, we owe you a present.
00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:09,785
Two! I've been engaged twice.
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,295
Look at this clown.
00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:23,799
Because he's got a bigger boat
he thinks he can take up the whole river.
00:06:23,966 --> 00:06:26,676
Get out of the way, jackass!
00:06:28,429 --> 00:06:31,056
Who names their boat
Coast Guard, anyway?
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,812
- That is the Coast Guard.
- What are they doing out here?
00:06:36,979 --> 00:06:39,231
The coast is all the way over there.
00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:41,608
Joey, just ignore the boats.
00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:44,069
- We're not finished with our lesson.
- All right.
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,488
I'm gonna go over the basic
points one more time.
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:49,825
Come on, Rach. Not again. I got it, okay?
Let's start sailing!
00:06:49,992 --> 00:06:53,620
I want to go over there
where that boatload of girls is. Yeah, oh!
00:06:54,872 --> 00:06:56,248
Oh, is that what you wanna do?
00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:59,167
You want to give a shout out
to the old hot chicas?
00:06:59,335 --> 00:07:01,670
Okay, let's do that, Sailor Joe.
00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:05,006
Quick question, though:
What's this called?
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:09,469
- Uh, boat rope?
- Wrong.
00:07:09,637 --> 00:07:12,347
- How do you get the mainsail up?
- Uh...
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:14,599
Rub it?
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:21,148
No. What do you do if I say
we're coming about?
00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:23,733
I'd say, "Come again?" Ha, ha.
00:07:23,901 --> 00:07:26,445
No, no, I know this one.
I know this one. Uh, um...
00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:28,572
[BLARING]
00:07:28,739 --> 00:07:30,532
Time's up. Now you're dead.
00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:31,825
And deaf!
00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:34,161
Okay, you go on
and make your little jokes.
00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:36,371
If you don't know
what you're doing at sea...
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:39,958
...you will die at sea.
Am I getting through to you, sailor?
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,461
- Yes.
- Don't just say yes.
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:45,172
This isn't a game.
You could get hurt out here!
00:07:45,339 --> 00:07:48,133
So do you want to pay attention,
or do you want to die?
00:07:51,512 --> 00:07:54,264
I want to make a
ship-to-shore call to Chandler.
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:06,526
- All right, I definitely taste nutmeg.
- You do?
00:08:06,694 --> 00:08:09,529
You don't? Heh.
Well, that's the difference...
00:08:09,697 --> 00:08:11,531
...between a professional and a layman.
00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:14,951
That and arrogance.
00:08:17,121 --> 00:08:18,163
Hey.
00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:19,915
Hey. How was sailing?
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,626
I don't want to talk about it.
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:25,253
- You could've saved me a whole cookie.
- No!
00:08:25,421 --> 00:08:26,838
[PHOEBE & MONICA YELLING]
00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,593
Women are mean!
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,557
I can't believe that.
00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:41,061
Now the only thing left
of my grandmother's legacy is...
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:42,896
...this crumb.
00:08:44,815 --> 00:08:47,692
I wish you a long and happy marriage.
00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:52,572
- Hey.
- How was it?
00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:54,449
Well, I had a great time.
00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:57,953
Um, Chauncey on the other hand...
00:08:58,162 --> 00:09:00,163
I will tell the story.
00:09:00,414 --> 00:09:03,500
It was going great.
I let him win, we were bonding...
00:09:03,751 --> 00:09:05,585
...he even said I could call him Dad.
00:09:05,753 --> 00:09:07,587
And what did he ask you
not to call him?
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,006
"Daddy."
00:09:11,175 --> 00:09:13,134
Look, here's the story.
00:09:14,011 --> 00:09:16,429
CHANDLER:
We had just finished playing racquetball...
00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:18,223
...and we were gonna take a steam.
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,975
I walk into the steam room...
00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:22,060
...and it's really steamy.
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:27,816
So I take off my glasses,
and that's when it happened.
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,025
Guys?
00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:32,195
ROSS: Over here.
JACK: Have a seat, son.
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,369
Hey!
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:52,382
- Oh, my God, Chandler! I can't believe it.
- I know.
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:54,968
You gave my father a lap dance.
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,974
Why do they put
so much steam in there?
00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:07,272
Because otherwise they'd
have to call it the "room" room.
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:12,861
Why, okay? Why?
Why did that have to happen?
00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:15,280
Come on, it's not that big a deal.
00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:17,866
Not that big a deal? There...
00:10:18,117 --> 00:10:20,493
There was touching of things.
00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:22,871
I know you wanted
to bond with my dad...
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:26,249
...but did you have to bond
to that part?
00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:33,089
Listen, I'm sure Dad doesn't care.
He probably thought this was funny.
00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:35,050
He'll be telling this story for years.
00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:38,011
I don't want him to tell
this story for years.
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:40,597
Oh, but he will.
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:45,518
He still tells the story about how
Monica tried to escape from fat camp.
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:48,480
I wasn't escaping.
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,940
Then how'd you get caught
in the barbed wire?
00:10:52,109 --> 00:10:53,818
I was trying to help out a squirrel.
00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,820
You were trying to eat it.
00:10:58,240 --> 00:10:59,282
[PHONE RINGS]
00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,993
If that is your father calling
to tell this story...
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:03,953
...then the marriage is off!
00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:06,539
Come on. Hello.
00:11:07,249 --> 00:11:09,584
I'm sorry, you have the wrong number.
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:11,753
Okay, I'll call you later, Dad. I love you.
00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:20,637
- All right, I'm off to see your dad.
- Oh, whoa.
00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:23,014
Aren't you a little overdressed?
00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:27,727
Yeah, and you better make sure
he tips you this time.
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:32,107
I figured I would try to convince
him not to tell the story anymore...
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:35,235
...and I figured the best way
to do that was face to face.
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:37,987
And by "face," I don't mean his lap.
00:11:38,239 --> 00:11:41,074
And by "face," I don't mean my ass.
00:11:43,869 --> 00:11:46,663
Are you getting Monica
and Chandler an engagement present?
00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:49,249
I don't know. You know,
they didn't get us anything.
00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:51,084
Thank you!
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,212
- Hey.
- Hey.
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:55,964
Well, hello.
00:11:56,173 --> 00:11:59,050
So when are we getting
back out on the water, matey?
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:03,471
Oh, uh, I don't know the boat way
to say this, but, never.
00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:09,060
- Why not?
- Because you're mean on the boat.
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:11,521
Wha...? I was just trying to teach you.
00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:14,107
Well, lesson learned.
Rachel is mean.
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:18,194
Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,573
I remember when she took me out
on her dad's boat.
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,575
She wouldn't let me help out at all.
00:12:23,784 --> 00:12:27,162
Excuse me, I wanted you to help.
But you couldn't move your arms...
00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:30,373
...because you were wearing
three life jackets.
00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:34,461
You have to respect the sea.
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,798
Look, Joey, I'm sorry if you thought
that was mean.
00:12:38,966 --> 00:12:41,134
But I tell you something,
that was not mean.
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:45,096
My father is mean. He used to yell at me
all the time on the boat.
00:12:45,347 --> 00:12:48,433
It was horrible.
I was being a really good teacher.
00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:51,519
Does a good teacher say,
"Put down the beer, pinhead!"
00:12:52,271 --> 00:12:55,774
Does a good student drink 7 beers
during his first lesson?
00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:57,525
Six and a half.
00:12:58,068 --> 00:13:00,028
You knocked that last one
out of my hand.
00:13:00,237 --> 00:13:02,155
I didn't want you to get hit
by the boom.
00:13:02,364 --> 00:13:03,698
Well, it hit me anyway.
00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:07,118
It would have hurt a lot less
if I had finished that last beer.
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:13,249
I'm sorry. I will try to tone it down
and, uh, stop yelling.
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,544
- You won't boss me around?
- I won't boss you around.
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:18,338
- And you'll be nice?
- I'll be nice.
00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:21,216
- And you'll be topless?
- And I... Joey!
00:13:21,383 --> 00:13:22,801
You want me to learn?
00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:30,266
Okay, here's batch 22.
00:13:30,434 --> 00:13:32,477
Maybe these'll taste
like your grandmother's.
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:35,396
This has a bit of orange peel,
but no nutmeg.
00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:37,482
- Mm. Let's give it a shot.
MONICA: Ugh.
00:13:37,691 --> 00:13:40,193
I have not made so many cookies
since 9th grade.
00:13:40,402 --> 00:13:44,113
- What was that for, a bake sale?
- No, just a Friday night.
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:50,578
Mm. These are pretty good.
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:53,206
- Yeah, but not as good as batch 17.
- Mm-mm.
00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:54,457
Which one was that?
00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,793
The ones we had
after you almost threw up.
00:13:57,837 --> 00:14:00,421
Oh, yeah, batch 17 was good.
00:14:00,589 --> 00:14:03,299
I did not like batch 16.
00:14:04,802 --> 00:14:06,427
I'm okay.
00:14:07,596 --> 00:14:10,682
Are there any more from the good batch?
We could work off those.
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:14,561
Well, yeah, I think there's one
from batch 17 left. Uh...
00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:22,485
Batch 16.
Sixteen, people, get out of the way!
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:33,746
Okay, Joey.
Honey, you're doing really good.
00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,083
I just need you
to step to the portside.
00:14:41,463 --> 00:14:43,965
Remember how we
talked about the portside?
00:14:44,174 --> 00:14:45,717
- Oh, yeah.
- Right?
00:14:45,926 --> 00:14:47,093
No.
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:52,473
It's left, sweetie, but that's okay.
That's a tough one.
00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:54,100
Why not just say left?
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,060
Okay, go to the left.
00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:02,233
Ahem, the left.
00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,651
- Huh?
- Just sit over there!
00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:06,070
Okay! Okay!
You're yelling again. See that?
00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:10,199
Oh, no, no. Very quiet.
Said with love, no yelling.
00:15:12,494 --> 00:15:13,745
You know what?
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,332
Since I'm here, I'm gonna have
a beer on the portside.
00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:20,335
See what I did there? Ha, ha.
00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:27,133
We're luffing a little.
Will you tighten up the Cunningham?
00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:31,471
Whoa, you just said a bunch
of stuff I don't know.
00:15:31,639 --> 00:15:34,390
Joey, come on!
We just went over this.
00:15:34,558 --> 00:15:38,770
Oh, when we did that was when that bird
was overhead with the fish in his mouth.
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:42,023
- Did you see it? It was gross.
- No! I did not see the bird.
00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:46,319
I did not see the fish! I did not see the
piece of Styrofoam shaped like Mike Tyson!
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:51,908
I did not, because I was trying
to teach you how to sail a boat.
00:15:52,076 --> 00:15:54,869
Which obviously is
an impossible thing to do.
00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:58,164
That's it! You're yelling,
and I don't see you taking your top off.
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,166
I quit!
00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:03,336
- What do you mean? You can't quit.
- Why not?
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:07,048
Because you're not finished!
I won't have it. Greens do not quit.
00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:09,634
Greens?
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:12,971
I'm a Tribbiani. Tribbianis quit.
00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:17,392
Oh, my God. Wait.
00:16:17,559 --> 00:16:20,687
Did I...? I just said,
"Greens don't quit," didn't I?
00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:25,525
- Did I say, "Greens don't quit"?
- Yes! And you're still yelling at me.
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:28,611
No, I'm not yelling at you.
I'm just yelling near you.
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,697
Oh, God, Joey. Oh, I'm my father.
00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:33,616
Oh, my God. This is horrible.
00:16:34,743 --> 00:16:38,621
I've been trying so hard not to be
my mother, I did not see this coming.
00:16:40,249 --> 00:16:41,833
Ugh, Joey.
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:46,879
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
I just wanted you to learn.
00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:50,925
- Ugh.
- Hey, I...
00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:52,677
I did learn.
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,971
- Really?
- Yeah, come on.
00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:58,016
- No.
- Yeah. It's okay.
00:16:58,225 --> 00:17:00,643
I know what a mainsail is. Huh?
00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:04,731
I know to duck when
the boom comes across.
00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:08,026
- I know port is right.
- Left.
00:17:08,235 --> 00:17:09,736
Damn it!
00:17:12,781 --> 00:17:15,241
You know, I bet it would
make my grandma happy...
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:18,369
...to know that we're trying
to figure out her recipe.
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:23,082
I bet she's looking up at us
and smiling right now.
00:17:24,668 --> 00:17:26,502
Looking up?
00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:31,299
Oh, yeah, no, she was really nice to me
but she's in hell for sure.
00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:35,136
Well, I've tried everything. I give up.
00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:38,181
I'm not gonna be the mom
who makes the world's best cookies.
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:43,603
I do make the best
duck confit with broccoli raab.
00:17:43,854 --> 00:17:45,021
Kids love that, right?
00:17:46,982 --> 00:17:50,568
Aw, Pheeb, isn't there any relative
that would have the recipe?
00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:52,403
What about your sister?
00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:55,448
Oh, no. I made a promise
to myself that the next time...
00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:58,785
...I would talk to Ursula
is over my dead body.
00:18:00,204 --> 00:18:04,791
And that's not happening
until October 15, 2032.
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:07,168
That's the day you're gonna die? See.
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:10,338
Darn it, I've got shuffleboard that day.
Heh.
00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:13,216
That's what you think.
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:19,847
What about friends of your grandmother?
Would they have the recipe?
00:18:20,015 --> 00:18:23,601
You know, I may have relatives in France
who would know.
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,603
My grandmother said
she got the recipe...
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:29,357
...from her grandmother,
"Nestley Toulouse."
00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:32,276
What was her name?
00:18:33,028 --> 00:18:36,280
Nestley Toulouse.
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:39,867
Nestlé Toll House?
00:18:43,247 --> 00:18:44,914
Ugh.
00:18:45,207 --> 00:18:47,792
You Americans always butcher
the French language.
00:18:49,753 --> 00:18:52,255
Phoebe, is this the recipe?
00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:56,134
Yes!
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:00,429
Oh.
00:19:01,014 --> 00:19:04,934
I cannot believe that I spent the last two
days trying to figure out that recipe.
00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,811
It was in my cupboard the whole time!
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:10,940
I know! You see, it is stuff like this...
00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:13,651
...which is why you're burning in hell!
00:19:17,781 --> 00:19:19,031
CHANDLER:
So you understand.
00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:21,909
I'd feel more comfortable
if you didn't tell people.
00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:24,745
You know,
I'm a little embarrassed about it.
00:19:24,913 --> 00:19:28,291
I understand completely.
There's nothing more horrifying...
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:30,960
...than embarrassing yourself
in front of your in-laws.
00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:35,506
As a matter of fact, when I started
dating Judy, I was unemployed.
00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,717
Her father asked me
what I did for a living.
00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:40,094
- I told him I was a lawyer.
- Heh.
00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:42,680
- What'd you do when they found out?
- They never did.
00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:46,559
So if you ever see me giving them
legal advice, just nod along.
00:19:48,061 --> 00:19:49,312
Shall we?
00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:07,371
So, I guess we wear swimsuits in here.
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,845
Well, Joey, I hate to admit it...
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:25,681
...your way of sailing
is a lot more fun.
00:20:26,725 --> 00:20:28,142
Yep, yep.
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:31,479
Hey, why don't you give a pull
on that rope?
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:32,855
We're not sailing.
00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:36,275
- Just pull on it.
- All right.
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:40,905
- Hey!
- Eh?
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:42,865
Sandwiches!
00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:45,284
- What else?
- Ha, ha.
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:47,203
Here you go.
00:20:47,371 --> 00:20:50,623
- Thank you.
- Oh, wow.
00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:54,669
- What are you doing?
- Oops. Sorry.
00:20:54,836 --> 00:20:58,005
Don't hold it like that.
You're letting all the good stuff fall out.
00:20:58,173 --> 00:20:59,924
- Oh. Oops.
- Careful!
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:02,593
You're wasting good pastrami!
00:21:05,472 --> 00:21:08,349
Oh, my God. I'm my dad!
00:21:13,563 --> 00:21:15,564
[English - US - SDH]
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