Эпизод, где Рэйчел возвращается на работу

00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:06,171

Good morning, tiger.

00:00:06,339 --> 00:00:10,467

I'm making you a big breakfast, so you

can keep up your strength for tonight.

00:00:10,635 --> 00:00:13,345

You're gonna get me

good and pregnant.

00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:17,391

I've got nowhere to go this morning.

I'm unemployed.

00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:19,643

I don't know what

I'm gonna do with my life.

00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:22,646

Well, I just lost my erection.

00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:25,858

No, I mean, what am I supposed

to do with myself?

00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,277

You're supposed to find

your passion in life.

00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:31,405

You can be whatever you want

to be now. It's exciting.

00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:34,658

Yeah, but it's all so overwhelming.

I don't know where to start.

00:00:34,826 --> 00:00:37,703

Hey, wait a second.

I can help you with this.

00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:41,915

You just need to be organized. We can

make a list of your qualifications...

00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:48,005

...and categorize jobs by industry.

There could be folders and files...

00:00:48,173 --> 00:00:52,885

Hey, this is where your hyper-organized

pain-in-the-ass stuff pays off.

00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:54,762

I know!

00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:57,723

My erection is back!

00:01:37,555 --> 00:01:38,639

Thank you.

00:01:38,807 --> 00:01:42,017

Ooh, Joey, could I have a sip

of your coffee and a bite of your muffin?

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- Okay.

- Thank you.

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Thank you.

00:01:54,405 --> 00:01:58,450

Uh, Pheebs, have you ever been bitten

by a hungry Italian?

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I'm sorry.

It's just, I'm a little short on cash.

00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:04,706

Oh, if you want,

I could loan you some money.

00:02:04,874 --> 00:02:07,751

Oh, no, no, no. I learned never to

borrow money from friends.

00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:11,839

No. That's why Richard Dreyfuss

and I don't speak anymore.

00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:16,385

Ooh, hey, how about this?

Wanna be an extra on my show?

00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:18,011

- You could do that?

- Yeah, yeah.

00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:21,431

The pay's pretty good, and you

could do it for as long as you need.

00:02:21,599 --> 00:02:24,935

- Oh, my God. I'm gonna be on TV!

- Okay, now...

00:02:25,103 --> 00:02:28,981

I gotta tell you, being on TV isn't

as glamorous and exciting as you think.

00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:32,651

- Oh, really?

- No, it is awesome.

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Hey, guys.

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JOEY: Hey.

- Hi.

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Oh, wow.

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Hey, why are you all dressed up?

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We're bringing Emma to Ralph Lauren

today to introduce her to everyone.

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- Doesn't she look cute?

- She sure does.

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Why does she have a pink bow

taped to her head?

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If one more person says,

"What a cute little boy"...

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...I'm gonna whip them

with a car antenna.

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I think she's gonna be

the hit of the office, huh?

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Yeah, she's gonna be hotter than,

uh, peasant blouses and A-line skirts.

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Can I get a blue bow?

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Okay. I have looked through

a bunch of career guides...

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...photocopied and highlighted

key passages...

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...and put them into alphabetical folders,

so you can make an informed decision.

00:03:19,407 --> 00:03:21,617

How long was I in there?

00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:25,537

Okay, let's start with the A's.

Advertising.

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Wait. Advertising, that's a great idea.

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Well, don't you wanna

look through the rest?

00:03:34,380 --> 00:03:38,008

I don't think I have to hear the rest.

Advertising makes perfect sense.

00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:40,344

I'm sorry you had to waste all this time.

00:03:40,511 --> 00:03:43,138

You call eight hours alone

with my label maker wasted time?

00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:44,389

[CHUCKLES]

00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,934

Ooh, now I'll get to use my shredder!

00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:51,438

I mean, I could write slogans.

I mean, how hard could it be, right?

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"Cheese.

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It's milk that you chew."

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"Crackers. Because your cheese

needs a buddy."

00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:09,331

"A grape. Because who can get

a watermelon in your mouth?"

00:04:10,458 --> 00:04:11,708

Oh, I got one.

00:04:11,876 --> 00:04:16,088

"Socks. Because your family's feet

deserve the best."

00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:17,798

Honey, leave it to the pros.

00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:21,301

I actually know someone

in advertising.

00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:24,388

I grew up with a guy who is

a vice president at a big agency.

00:04:24,555 --> 00:04:27,140

Maybe I can get him to meet you.

Give me the phone.

00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:32,646

"The phone. Bringing you closer

to people who have phones."

00:04:33,815 --> 00:04:36,441

"Marriage. It's not for everybody."

00:04:40,655 --> 00:04:44,324

That went well. Almost everybody

knew that she was a girl.

00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:47,995

Yeah, after you punched that one guy

who got it wrong, word spread.

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I'm just gonna go in my office

and pick up some stuff.

00:04:55,503 --> 00:04:58,088

- Who the hell are you?

- Who the hell are you?

00:04:58,256 --> 00:05:01,300

I'm the hell person

whose office this is.

00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:03,635

Good one, Rach.

00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:07,639

I'm Gavin Mitchell,

the person who's taking over your job.

00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,057

Excuse me?

00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:11,935

Oh, your baby's so cute.

00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:13,145

[LAUGHS]

00:05:13,354 --> 00:05:16,356

But why would you put

a pink bow on a boy?

00:05:21,195 --> 00:05:23,613

Hey, Joey. Look at me.

00:05:23,781 --> 00:05:25,157

I'm a nurse.

00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,658

- Yes, you are.

- Ha, ha.

00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,994

I think it might be time

for my sponge bath.

00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:33,081

Sorry, I'm just so used

to hitting on the extras.

00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:36,793

- So are you excited about your scene?

- Yeah, but I'm a little nervous.

00:05:36,961 --> 00:05:40,714

Oh, relax. Don't be. They'll probably

just make you stand in the background.

00:05:40,882 --> 00:05:43,508

- Good.

- You. Here, come here. Here.

00:05:44,302 --> 00:05:47,804

Take this tray, stand on this yellow

mark. You're gonna move on "action."

00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:51,725

Walk over to the operating table, stop on

the blue mark and put the tray down.

00:05:51,893 --> 00:05:53,518

Don't walk too fast.

00:05:54,103 --> 00:05:56,104

But don't dawdle.

00:05:56,981 --> 00:05:59,024

Okay. Now, what?

00:05:59,817 --> 00:06:03,362

And, action!

00:06:03,821 --> 00:06:05,906

[INSTRUMENTS RATTLING]

00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,160

DIRECTOR: Cut! Cut.

- I'm sorry.

00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:13,580

- I'm sorry. I'm just a little nervous.

- Yeah, well, don't be.

00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:16,291

Okay, that helps.

00:06:17,293 --> 00:06:20,045

And, action!

00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:23,632

[RATTLING]

00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,217

DIRECTOR:

Cut!

00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,053

Don't worry about it.

It usually takes me three takes too.

00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,639

Ha-ha-ha. All right, eight.

00:06:31,974 --> 00:06:35,185

DIRECTOR:

And...

00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:36,937

...action!

00:06:37,772 --> 00:06:39,856

[RATTLING]

00:06:54,872 --> 00:06:57,374

So do you have any other

questions about advertising?

00:06:57,542 --> 00:07:01,002

No. No. But let me show you

what I can do.

00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:04,297

"Bagels and doughnuts.

00:07:04,465 --> 00:07:08,343

Round food for every mood."

00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:12,305

Monica warned me you might do that.

00:07:14,183 --> 00:07:16,768

I think we might have something

for you at the agency.

00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:19,896

- Really? That's great.

- It's an unpaid internship.

00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:26,736

That's funny. When you said "unpaid,"

it sounded like you said "unpaid."

00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:29,322

Come on, now. Monica has a good job.

00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:31,491

It's not like you have

a family to support.

00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:35,579

Actually, we're trying. I don't think

Monica is gonna want to postpone it.

00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:37,414

We're supposed to have sex tonight.

00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:41,877

Actually, she's probably at home,

naked right now.

00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:47,382

I tend to keep talking

till somebody stops me.

00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,219

- I can picture her on the bed.

- Stop!

00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:52,888

Okay.

00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:57,184

Wait. What do you mean,

you're taking over my job?

00:07:57,351 --> 00:08:00,437

Well, while you were on your

baby vacation, I was doing your job.

00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:03,773

A vacation? My idea

of a vacation does not involve...

00:08:03,941 --> 00:08:08,028

...something sucking on my nipples

until they are raw.

00:08:08,946 --> 00:08:12,073

Clearly, you've never been

to Sandals Paradise Island.

00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:19,372

All right. Don't get too comfortable

there, because I'm back in two weeks.

00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:21,374

I want everything back the way it was.

00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:25,045

I can't say I care too much for the way

you've rearranged my office.

00:08:25,213 --> 00:08:28,048

I can't say I care too much

for that smell you've brought in.

00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:29,341

Excuse me?

00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:33,595

Uh, Rach, uh,

we have a code brown situation.

00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:37,224

Honey, could you please

take care of it for me?

00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:41,061

All right, but you're gonna

have to do one sometime.

00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,273

Let me just get this straight.

00:08:45,441 --> 00:08:48,777

So I go have a baby, and they send

some guy in to do my job?

00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:52,113

Well, there was talk of shutting down

Ralph Lauren altogether.

00:08:52,281 --> 00:08:54,908

Okay. Right.

You're very cheeky for a temp.

00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:58,453

I'm not a temp. I was transferred here

from another department.

00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:02,249

Oh, and what department was that?

The, uh, jerk department?

00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:04,292

They didn't tell me

about your quick wit.

00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:07,128

Well, did they mention that

I'm rubber and you're glue?

00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:12,133

- Gavin, Ralph loved your ideas.

- Oh, hi, Mr. Zelner.

00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:14,761

Ah, Rachel. I see you've met Gavin.

00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:17,931

When you left us, we weren't sure

what we were gonna do.

00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:22,018

But then, Gavin to the rescue.

Super Gavin. Ha-ha-ha.

00:09:23,145 --> 00:09:24,604

Well, that's great.

00:09:24,772 --> 00:09:27,649

So now, uh, Super Gavin,

when I come back...

00:09:27,817 --> 00:09:31,319

...uh, where do you plan

on flying off to?

00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:34,698

That's up to Mr. Zelner.

I'm sure he'll make the right decision.

00:09:34,865 --> 00:09:38,201

Oh, wow. Super ass-kissing power.

00:09:39,203 --> 00:09:41,580

Incidentally,

when, uh, are you coming back?

00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:44,165

Uh, today.

00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:48,420

- You said two weeks.

- No, I said today.

00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,673

See, for a superhero,

not so much with the listening.

00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:56,803

- Hey.

PHOEBE: Hey.

00:09:56,971 --> 00:09:58,013

So, what'd he say?

00:09:58,180 --> 00:09:59,347

Uh...

00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:01,683

He can be a little rough

around the edges...

00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:06,855

...so I'm gonna replace a word

he used a lot with the word "puppy."

00:10:08,232 --> 00:10:13,403

Okay? So he said, "If your puppy friend

doesn't get her puppy act together...

00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:16,698

...I am gonna fire

her mother-puppy ass."

00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:20,577

I'm sorry. I can't do this.

I'm just not an actor.

00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:23,163

That's right. You're not. You're a nurse.

00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:25,832

- You're Nurse With Tray.

- Joey...

00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:29,002

Nurse With Tray doesn't know Joey.

She has no time for friends.

00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:32,714

She gets in that operating room

and she carries that tray to the doctor...

00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:35,050

...because if she doesn't, people die.

00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:36,843

Who dies?

00:10:37,011 --> 00:10:38,928

Man With Eye Patch!

00:10:39,096 --> 00:10:41,556

Now, you get in there,

and you do your job.

00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:42,849

- Yes, doctor.

- Okay.

00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:44,559

[ALARM BUZZES]

00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:47,646

Okay, let's try this one more time.

00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:51,650

Hang in there, Man With Eye Patch.

Your tray is coming.

00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:56,905

And, action.

00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:04,204

Yes, I did it! I nailed it!

00:11:04,372 --> 00:11:05,413

Whoo!

00:11:05,581 --> 00:11:06,665

What's next?

00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:09,250

The rest of the scene.

00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:12,879

Okay, from the top, people.

00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:23,139

Listen, sudden change of plans.

Um, my maternity leave just ended.

00:11:23,307 --> 00:11:26,059

They said if I didn't

come back today, they'd fire me.

00:11:26,268 --> 00:11:28,186

What? No, that's illegal.

00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,980

I'll have the Labor Department

here so fast, they won't...

00:11:31,190 --> 00:11:36,903

All right, calm down, Norma Rae.

They didn't actually say that.

00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:41,157

I'm just afraid if I don't come back now,

this guy will try and squeeze me out.

00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:44,703

But what about Emma?

I mean, we don't have a nanny.

00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,914

I know. We're just gonna have

to figure out a plan tonight.

00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:50,542

Can you please just take care

of her for today?

00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:54,546

Absolutely. Just give me your breasts,

and we'll be on our way.

00:11:56,048 --> 00:11:58,591

Come on.

I don't know what else to do.

00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:02,178

- Fine. Fine.

- Okay.

00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:06,599

We'll have fun, won't we?

Yes, we will. Yes, we...

00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:08,685

[EMMA GIGGLES]

00:12:11,313 --> 00:12:13,523

- Ross.

- Huh?

00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:16,568

You're pretty.

00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:26,578

Whatever I decide to do, I'm gonna be

starting a new career from scratch.

00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,706

It's gonna be a while

before I make a living at it.

00:12:29,874 --> 00:12:34,419

Maybe now's not the right time

to be starting a family.

00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:38,673

So you have to tell Monica you don't

want to have a baby right now?

00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,383

Yeah.

00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:43,678

Goodbye.

00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:51,227

Okay, it's baby time. Pants off, Bing.

00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:55,064

Didn't see you there, Geller.

00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:59,027

Yeah, Ross is here, so...

00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:01,780

Uh, yeah, uh-huh. Yeah.

00:13:01,947 --> 00:13:05,283

Uh, and I was really hoping

that maybe I could hang out.

00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:09,537

- Mm.

- What do you, uh, feel like doing?

00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:13,041

Well, uh, we're gonna have sex.

00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:16,294

I don't feel like having sex.

00:13:19,048 --> 00:13:20,381

Uh, maybe, uh... I don't know.

00:13:20,549 --> 00:13:23,092

Maybe we can

watch a movie or something.

00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:24,594

Uh, let me put it this way:

00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:27,472

We're having sex

whether you're here or not.

00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:30,016

Pants off, Bing.

00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:38,942

Now that I'm back, why don't you just

fill me in on what you've been up to?

00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:43,071

Well, I've changed your screen saver

from that picture of *NSYNC.

00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:45,031

Hey, they were popular when I left.

00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:48,785

I'm working on this

big presentation for tomorrow.

00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:51,579

I should be involved in that,

so get me up to speed.

00:13:51,747 --> 00:13:54,624

That'll take weeks.

Let me take care of the presentation.

00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:56,960

Oh, no. I see what you're

doing here, all right?

00:13:57,127 --> 00:14:01,673

This is my job, buddy. I've had it for

five years, and I know how it works.

00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:05,051

- So why don't you just catch me up?

- Fine.

00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:09,639

Oh, God. You've totally messed

with the back support on my chair.

00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:12,141

- How do you fix this?

- You've been here five years.

00:14:12,309 --> 00:14:15,311

- You figure it out.

- Fine, I will.

00:14:22,403 --> 00:14:23,987

All right, fill me in.

00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:30,952

- Hey.

- Hey.

00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:34,789

Do you have a blue tie that would go

with this? Emma spit up on mine.

00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,667

Oh, yeah, but you have to give it back

if I get a job.

00:14:37,835 --> 00:14:40,253

Of course, by that time,

ties will be obsolete...

00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:42,714

...and we'll all be wearing

silver jumpsuits.

00:14:45,175 --> 00:14:47,010

- Hey, good morning, lover.

- Hey.

00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:50,805

I gotta say, after last night,

I'm a little weak in the knees.

00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:58,646

Here's an idea. You walk into a room,

take a quick scan.

00:15:01,108 --> 00:15:02,317

Sorry.

00:15:02,484 --> 00:15:06,154

But I kind of have this feeling that

we may have made a baby last night.

00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:11,034

Oh, God, I have to tell you something.

00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:13,453

You're not pregnant.

00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,204

What are you talking about?

00:15:15,372 --> 00:15:18,666

Well, that thing that I have to do

to make a baby?

00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,251

I faked it.

00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:23,379

What? You faked it?

00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:26,341

You know what?

00:15:28,093 --> 00:15:30,303

I don't need a tie.

00:15:31,639 --> 00:15:35,308

I mean, it's...

It's better open collar, you know?

00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:39,687

It's, uh, ahem, it's more casual.

00:15:45,527 --> 00:15:48,613

Joey. Listen, I can't do this.

It doesn't make any sense.

00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:52,700

Yesterday I was a nurse,

and today I'm a waitress at a café?

00:15:52,868 --> 00:15:56,371

Oh, sometimes we use the same extras

for different parts. It's okay.

00:15:56,538 --> 00:16:01,167

Well, it's not okay, because I gave a very

memorable performance as the nurse.

00:16:01,335 --> 00:16:05,922

And now, suddenly, I'm the waitress?

That's gonna confuse my fans.

00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,132

Um, um...

00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:11,678

Well, maybe you are a nurse...

00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:15,473

...but you moonlight as a waitress.

00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:18,101

Oh.

00:16:18,268 --> 00:16:19,811

Uh-huh.

00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:23,398

Because I'm a single mother

supporting my two children.

00:16:23,857 --> 00:16:25,733

- Nice. Yeah.

- Yeah.

00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,319

Okay. Wait a minute.

00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:33,074

Dr. Drake Ramoray and I work at the

same hospital. Wouldn't I come say hi?

00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:37,328

No. No, see, uh,

you and Drake are having a fight.

00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:38,955

About what?

00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:42,291

He slept with you

and then never called you.

00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:46,212

And I just wanted a new daddy

for Davey and Becky.

00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:47,422

Okay.

00:16:47,589 --> 00:16:49,048

[ALARM BUZZES]

00:16:49,216 --> 00:16:51,342

Okay. Okay, from the top.

00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:54,679

And, action.

00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:58,141

So I'm surprised you agreed

to have lunch with me.

00:16:58,308 --> 00:17:00,768

I'm surprised too. But yet, here I am.

00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,022

DIRECTOR:

Cut! Cut!

00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:06,315

What...? What are you doing?

00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:10,695

I'm very angry at him because he slept

with me and never called me back.

00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:12,905

- Me too.

- Me too!

00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:16,284

Oh, calm down.

She means on the show.

00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:19,245

We need some new extras

around here.

00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:25,168

Wow. You're here already.

00:17:25,335 --> 00:17:29,130

Yes. Emma and I came in a little early

to do research on the presentation.

00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:32,633

Actually, I made a few changes.

I think I'm caught up on everything.

00:17:32,801 --> 00:17:34,844

So ask me anything.

00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:38,139

- How do you fix the chair?

- Ugh, except that!

00:17:39,141 --> 00:17:43,644

Oh, hello, Mr. Zelner. We are all ready

for our presentation this afternoon.

00:17:43,812 --> 00:17:48,566

- Good, because it's in 10 minutes.

- What? I can't do that. I have the baby.

00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:50,985

Ross is not gonna pick her up

for an hour.

00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:53,988

Then Gavin can give the presentation.

We have to do it now.

00:17:54,156 --> 00:17:58,826

Ralph needs to leave early today.

He's going helicopter shopping. Heh.

00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:03,081

Well, there you go, you win. You win.

00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:06,042

You get to do the presentation.

You'll knock them dead.

00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:10,213

No one will remember that I worked here,

and then Ralph will buy his helicopter...

00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:14,092

...and Super Gavin will just fly

right alongside of him.

00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:22,183

- You can do the presentation.

- No, I can't. I have a baby.

00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:24,477

I'll watch her.

00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:27,814

Why would you do that?

00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:32,151

Because you worked really hard, and

it's your job. And you're a little crazy.

00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:35,780

[VOICE BREAKING]

That's really nice.

00:18:36,406 --> 00:18:39,909

I should tell you that crying women

make me very uncomfortable.

00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:42,620

Well, you're not gonna like

what's coming.

00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,872

[SOBBING]

00:18:45,999 --> 00:18:48,751

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:50,545

God.

00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,131

Thank you. Thank you.

00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:55,883

Um.

00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:57,718

[WHISPERS]

Okay.

00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:02,515

I'm really fine. Don't worry.

I'm great with children.

00:19:04,059 --> 00:19:05,852

Okay.

00:19:09,398 --> 00:19:11,190

[SIGHS]

00:19:11,358 --> 00:19:13,192

[EMMA GIGGLES]

00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:16,112

Gavin Mitchell. Pleased to meet you.

00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,658

Please don't fire my friend.

Just let me talk to her.

00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:23,619

- Okay, but this is her last chance.

- Thank you.

00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:25,413

How about I do something for you?

00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:28,875

Tomorrow, uh, I'll bring you a hat,

cover up the bald.

00:19:33,797 --> 00:19:36,883

Hey, uh, listen, Pheebs.

I was just talking to the director...

00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:39,886

...and he was thinking maybe

this time you don't hit Drake.

00:19:40,053 --> 00:19:41,679

You just wait on the tables.

00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:44,891

I can't do that. I'm an actor.

I have a process.

00:19:45,058 --> 00:19:47,768

You're a masseuse.

You have a table with a hole in it.

00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:52,565

Wait, I see what's happening here.

You're threatened.

00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:53,900

What?

00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:57,361

I'm so good in the scene

that I'm stealing focus from you.

00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:00,823

Well, rise to the challenge, Tribbiani,

because I just raised the bar.

00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:04,535

- Come join me up here.

- Ha-ha-ha.

00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:10,750

Yeah, you can fire her, but I would

call security. She won't go easy.

00:20:13,503 --> 00:20:16,589

You faked it?

You couldn't have faked it.

00:20:16,757 --> 00:20:20,801

Yes, you can. You just make

the faces and the noises.

00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,013

Guys can fake it?

00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:27,600

Ugh, unbelievable.

The one thing that's ours.

00:20:30,270 --> 00:20:33,064

Why would you fake it

when we're trying to have a baby?

00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,942

Well, that's actually why.

00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:37,151

[CHANDLER SIGHS]

00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,111

Look, I'm starting

a whole new career now.

00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:40,947

I'm not saying I don't want a baby.

00:20:41,114 --> 00:20:43,950

I'm just saying maybe

we could wait a little while.

00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:46,494

Like...? Like a month?

00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:50,665

- Or a year?

- Really? You wanna wait a year?

00:20:50,832 --> 00:20:53,834

It could be less than a year.

I mean, you've heard my stuff.

00:20:54,002 --> 00:20:58,965

"Pants. Like shorts but longer."

00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,428

It'll probably be more than a year.

00:21:06,014 --> 00:21:07,473

Wow. I...

00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:11,811

- I really wanna have a baby.

- Well, yeah, me too.

00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:17,942

Look, I'll just get my old job back.

00:21:18,151 --> 00:21:20,653

No, I want you to have

a job that you love...

00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:24,365

...not statistical analysis

and data reconfiguration.

00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:27,285

I quit, and you learn what I do?

00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:34,041

I think there's never gonna be

a right time to have a baby.

00:21:34,209 --> 00:21:36,460

Now you're unemployed,

and in a little while...

00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:39,755

...you'll find a new job

that'll keep you really busy.

00:21:39,923 --> 00:21:42,550

There's always gonna be

a reason not to do this...

00:21:42,718 --> 00:21:46,887

...but I think once the baby comes,

we'll forget about all those reasons.

00:21:48,390 --> 00:21:50,099

I guess.

00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:53,185

I mean, it's always gonna be scary

when we have a baby.

00:21:53,353 --> 00:21:55,813

It's gonna be really scary.

00:21:55,981 --> 00:21:58,691

I mean, God, when we have a baby...

00:21:58,859 --> 00:22:02,653

...there's gonna be so much

that we're not able to control.

00:22:03,196 --> 00:22:07,199

I mean, the apartment's

gonna be a mess.

00:22:07,367 --> 00:22:09,660

I won't have time to clean it.

00:22:10,704 --> 00:22:13,331

What if the baby gets

into the ribbon drawer...

00:22:13,498 --> 00:22:16,167

...and messes up all the ribbons?

00:22:16,460 --> 00:22:18,627

What if there's no room

for a ribbon drawer...

00:22:18,795 --> 00:22:21,255

...because the baby's stuff

takes up all the space?

00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:23,591

Where will all the ribbons go?

00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,261

Should we go make a baby

before you change your mind?

00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:29,221

- Yes, please!

- Okay.

00:22:29,389 --> 00:22:32,350

Oh, and I promise I will not

fake it this time.

00:22:32,517 --> 00:22:35,770

Well, I wish I could say the same.

I'm a little shook up.

00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:43,694

I know you botched

that operation on purpose.

00:22:43,862 --> 00:22:48,074

I can't prove it yet, but when I do,

you'll be going to jail for murder.

00:22:48,241 --> 00:22:49,909

I don't care if you are my brother.

00:22:50,786 --> 00:22:52,912

I'm not your brother.

00:22:53,121 --> 00:22:55,164

What about my children, Drake? Huh?

00:22:55,332 --> 00:22:58,292

No! No! No!

00:22:59,294 --> 00:23:00,753

No! No!

00:23:01,963 --> 00:23:03,756

God!

00:23:08,595 --> 00:23:10,596

[English - US - SDH]