Эпизод, в котором Чендлер пойман

00:00:07,424 --> 00:00:09,383

This cake is amazing. Mm.

00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:11,510

My God, get a room.

00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:14,388

Mm.

I would get a room with this cake.

00:00:14,556 --> 00:00:16,765

I think I could show

this cake a good time.

00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:21,311

If you had to, what would

you give up, food or sex?

00:00:21,479 --> 00:00:23,564

Sex.

00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,692

Seriously, answer faster.

00:00:27,485 --> 00:00:28,902

Oh, I'm sorry, honey.

00:00:29,070 --> 00:00:33,615

No, when she said "sex," I wasn't

thinking about sex with you, heh.

00:00:34,951 --> 00:00:37,244

It's like a giant hug.

00:00:38,455 --> 00:00:41,457

Ross, how about you?

Which would you give up, sex or food?

00:00:41,624 --> 00:00:44,418

- Food.

- Okay, how about, um, sex or dinosaurs?

00:00:48,339 --> 00:00:49,381

[EMMA LAUGHS]

00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:53,052

Oh, my God, it's like Sophie's Choice.

00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:54,762

Oh, God.

00:00:54,929 --> 00:00:57,681

What about you, Joe?

What would you give up, sex or food?

00:00:57,849 --> 00:01:00,392

Uh... Ooh... Uh...

00:01:01,811 --> 00:01:03,562

I don't know, it's too hard.

00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:05,981

No, you gotta pick one.

00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:07,191

[JOEY SIGHS]

00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,234

Uh, food. No, sex.

00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:13,197

Food. Sex. Food. Sex...

I don't know. Oh, God, I want both.

00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:16,075

I want... I want girls on bread.

00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:01,703

- You gotta see these pictures of Emma.

- Oh, how cute.

00:02:01,871 --> 00:02:05,290

- Oh, she looks just like a little doll.

- Oh, no, that is a doll.

00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:08,252

Oh, thank God,

because that thing's really creepy.

00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:09,503

RACHEL:

Yeah.

00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,213

[RACHEL CHUCKLES]

00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,006

PHOEBE:

Look, there's Chandler.

00:02:13,174 --> 00:02:15,175

RACHEL:

Oh, who's the blond? She's pretty.

00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:16,385

[PHOEBE GASPS]

00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:17,928

He's having an affair.

00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,097

He is not having an affair.

00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,224

I'm always right about these things.

00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:26,061

No, you're not. Last week,

you thought Ross was trying to kill you.

00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:30,149

Well, sorry, but it's hard to believe

that anyone would tell a story that dull...

00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:32,234

...just to tell it.

00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:33,569

[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

00:02:33,736 --> 00:02:35,696

There's something going on with them.

00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,865

Look. He's getting into the car with her.

00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:39,658

RACHEL:

Oh, that doesn't mean anything.

00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,451

Oh, yeah? Well, let's see.

00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:43,036

Huh?

00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:45,873

- Okay, duck down.

- Oh.

00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:48,041

[LINE DIALS]

00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,379

- Hello?

- Oh, hi. It's Phoebe.

00:02:52,547 --> 00:02:54,965

Um, I know that Monica

is working today...

00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:58,677

...so I was wondering if you wanted to

come to the movies with me and Rachel.

00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:03,932

Oh, uh, I have to work too.

Yeah, I'm stuck here at the office all day.

00:03:06,769 --> 00:03:09,605

Uh, well, it's a shame

that you'll miss the movie...

00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:15,527

...because we were gonna see,

you know, either, um, Liar Liar or, um...

00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:20,699

...Betrayal or An Affair to Remember.

00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:23,285

Those are all really old.

00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,538

Okay, then maybe it'll be, um...

00:03:26,706 --> 00:03:28,457

Dude, Where's My Car?

00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:32,044

- What?

- They're in a car.

00:03:33,421 --> 00:03:36,381

Okay. Well, talk to you later,

okay? Bye.

00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,091

Jeez.

00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:41,011

Okay, quick. We gotta find a cab

and follow them.

00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:42,221

Oh, yeah, okay.

00:03:42,388 --> 00:03:45,432

Let me just grab my night-vision goggles

and my stun gun. Heh.

00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,893

I got them.

00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:54,858

- Hey.

- Hey. Hi, sweetie.

00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:57,361

Hey, you smell like

perfume and cigarettes.

00:03:57,528 --> 00:04:00,155

- I was in the car with Nancy.

- Nancy doesn't smoke.

00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:03,492

Well, at least the perfume's not mine.

Be thankful for that.

00:04:04,869 --> 00:04:07,788

So... What did you think

of the house?

00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,915

It's everything we've been looking for.

00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:12,793

Isn't it? And what about

the amazing wainscoting...

00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:15,712

...the crown molding

and the dormer windows in the attic?

00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,215

And the wiggle woms

and the zip zorps.

00:04:19,884 --> 00:04:21,677

What were the things you said?

00:04:21,844 --> 00:04:24,805

- Don't you love the huge yard?

- The fireplace in the bedroom.

00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:26,974

And Nancy said it's really underpriced...

00:04:27,141 --> 00:04:31,103

...because the guy lost his job

and has to move in with his parents!

00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,106

This is bringing out

a lovely color in you.

00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,567

So do you think we should get it?

00:04:37,735 --> 00:04:39,278

I don't know. What do you think?

00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:40,862

- I think we should.

- I do too.

00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:42,155

- This is huge.

- I know.

00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:43,699

How bad

do you wanna smoke now?

00:04:43,866 --> 00:04:46,868

I don't know what you mean,

giant, talking cigarette.

00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:50,497

Phoebe called as I was getting

into Nancy's car.

00:04:50,665 --> 00:04:52,624

If she asks you, I was at work all day.

00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:54,626

Got you. When do we tell them?

00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:58,422

We don't. Not until it's 100 percent.

Why upset everybody over nothing?

00:04:58,589 --> 00:04:59,965

Okay. Right.

00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:05,178

- Oh, my God, that is gonna be so hard.

- I know. Good luck with it.

00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:09,975

I just can't see Chandler cheating.

00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:13,687

I'm telling you guys, we followed

them out to a house in Westchester.

00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:18,525

They went in for 45 minutes, and then

they came out looking pretty happy.

00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:21,862

- Chandler?

RACHEL: Mm-hm.

00:05:22,030 --> 00:05:23,530

Forty-five minutes?

00:05:25,616 --> 00:05:27,367

Well, something's not right.

00:05:28,911 --> 00:05:30,787

I can't believe he'd do this to Monica.

00:05:30,955 --> 00:05:32,789

I know, and with the baby coming?

00:05:32,957 --> 00:05:34,791

- So should we tell her?

ROSS: I don't know.

00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:39,629

If one of us saw Mike with another

woman, would you want us to tell you?

00:05:39,797 --> 00:05:42,090

Why? Who'd you see him with?

00:05:42,258 --> 00:05:44,801

- No one. I'm just saying if we did...

- Tell me what you know!

00:05:44,969 --> 00:05:46,428

[SCREAMS]

00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:50,140

No one. Nothing. Mike's a great guy.

It was hypothetical.

00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:53,810

All right. He is a good guy.

00:05:53,978 --> 00:05:55,812

You're right. He wouldn't cheat.

00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:58,565

If I did see him with someone,

there's no way I...

00:05:58,733 --> 00:05:59,775

Who did you see him with?

00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,818

[SCREAMS]

00:06:14,832 --> 00:06:17,667

Oh, look at her. So happy.

00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:24,508

If only there were a smaller one

to clean this one.

00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:29,221

Hey, is, uh... Is Chandler here?

00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,640

No, he's picking up dinner.

Why, what's up?

00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:34,559

Well...

00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:39,481

Look, whatever happens,

we're here for you and we love you.

00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:45,028

- All right.

- Chandler might be having an affair.

00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:47,948

- What?

- Phoebe and I saw Chandler...

00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:51,368

...with a blond woman today

outside on the street.

00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:55,038

And then we followed them

to a house in Westchester.

00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:58,708

They went in together. I'm so sorry.

00:07:01,879 --> 00:07:04,756

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, that's awful.

00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:06,842

[SIGHS]

00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:09,302

What did you think of the house?

00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:13,932

What?

00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,560

Monica, you understand

what we're saying, right?

00:07:16,727 --> 00:07:21,565

Yeah. Sure. I mean,

I'm devastated, obviously.

00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:25,402

Did you think the neighborhood

was homey?

00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:30,198

- Hey.

- You son of a bitch.

00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:34,911

Is it me, or have the greetings

gone downhill around here?

00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:38,123

Phoebe and Rachel

saw you with Nancy today.

00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:41,543

And, um,

they think you're having an affair.

00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:43,503

- Who's Nancy?

- What's going on?

00:07:43,671 --> 00:07:44,796

Uh...

00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,798

Okay, uh...

00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:48,467

All right, you better sit down.

00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:51,344

- This is... This is pretty big.

- Yeah.

00:07:54,098 --> 00:07:56,224

I'm not having an affair.

00:07:56,392 --> 00:08:00,562

Nancy is our realtor.

00:08:00,730 --> 00:08:03,732

I knew he couldn't be with a woman

for 45 minutes.

00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:05,233

[LAUGHS]

00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:09,696

Why do you have a realtor?

00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:13,074

Um, she's been showing us houses

outside of the city.

00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:17,037

- What?

- Are you serious?

00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:19,831

When we found out

that we were gonna get this baby...

00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:23,293

...Chandler and I decided

we didn't wanna raise a kid in the city.

00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:25,378

So you're... So you're gonna move?

00:08:25,755 --> 00:08:27,506

Oh, my God.

00:08:28,257 --> 00:08:30,926

Shouldn't we all vote on stuff like this?

00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:34,804

What is wrong with raising a kid

in the city?

00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:37,182

I'm doing it. Ross is doing it.

00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,352

Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it.

00:08:40,686 --> 00:08:44,272

And that's great for you guys,

but we want a lawn and a swing set.

00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:46,691

A street where our kids

can ride their bikes...

00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,944

...and maybe an ice-cream truck

can go by.

00:08:49,111 --> 00:08:52,072

So you wanna buy a house

in the '50s.

00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,534

PHOEBE: Have you thought about

what you're giving up?

00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:57,869

You can't move out of the city.

What if...?

00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,121

What if you want Chinese food

at 5 a. M?

00:09:00,289 --> 00:09:03,124

Or a fake Rolex that breaks

as soon as it rains?

00:09:03,292 --> 00:09:06,670

Or an Asian hooker

sent right to your door?

00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:11,299

You know what? If you want to look

for a house, that's okay.

00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:15,178

No. No, it's not. Don't listen to him.

I'm gonna thump you.

00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:19,683

It's okay, because they have

to get it out of their system.

00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:24,854

Okay? But you're gonna realize

this is the only place you wanna be.

00:09:27,191 --> 00:09:28,775

Actually...

00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:30,735

...we already found a house we love.

00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:35,323

- What?

- About an hour ago, we made an offer.

00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:44,374

Bet you wish I was

having an affair now, huh?

00:09:50,631 --> 00:09:54,301

- You put an offer on a house?

- It's so sweet.

00:09:54,468 --> 00:09:57,762

It really is. It has this big yard

that leads down to this stream.

00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,889

And then there's these old maple trees.

00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:02,726

Oh, again with the nature.

What are you, beavers?

00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:06,021

Look, I know this is really hard,

and we're really sorry.

00:10:06,230 --> 00:10:09,524

Is this because I come over here

without knocking and eat your food?

00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:11,860

Because I can stop doing that.

00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:14,404

I really, really think I can.

00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:16,990

You know that's not the reason, Joe.

00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:20,577

[JOEY SNIFFS]

00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:25,248

MONICA:

I think if you saw it, you'd understand.

00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:27,709

You guys were there.

It's beautiful, isn't it?

00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:30,920

[RACHEL'S FOOT THUMPS]

00:10:31,088 --> 00:10:33,006

- Yeah, it is.

- What the hell are you doing?

00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:37,010

Well, it is, all right? When we were

out there today, all I kept thinking was:

00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:39,554

"I can't believe Chandler is

screwing this woman...

00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:42,057

...but, man, this would be

a nice place to live."

00:10:42,725 --> 00:10:44,351

Yeah, but so is this.

00:10:44,518 --> 00:10:47,562

Yeah. I mean, if you move there,

you have to leave here.

00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:50,231

I mean, how can you leave this place?

00:10:53,694 --> 00:10:55,737

Come on, Daddy, listen to me!

00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:59,699

It's like all of my life, everyone's

always told me, "You're a shoe!

00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:02,410

You're a shoe! You're a shoe!

You're a shoe!"

00:11:02,578 --> 00:11:05,580

Then today I stopped and said,

"What if I don't wanna be a shoe?

00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:08,333

What if I wanna be a purse?

You know?

00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:11,169

Or a hat?"

00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:14,339

I don't want you to buy me a hat,

I am a hat.

00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,966

It's a metaphor, Daddy!

00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,512

You can see where he'd have trouble.

00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:25,266

Well, maybe I'll just stay

here with Monica.

00:11:28,312 --> 00:11:30,814

I guess we've established

she's staying with Monica.

00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,609

Your money's mine, Green.

00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,486

Your fly's open, Geller.

00:11:38,322 --> 00:11:39,823

PHOEBE:

You know what I just realized?

00:11:39,990 --> 00:11:43,243

"Joker" is "poker" with a "J."

00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:47,330

Coincidence?

00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:50,625

Hey, that's "jo-incidence" with a "C."

00:11:54,463 --> 00:11:58,842

Ooh, look. Ugly Naked Guy

lit a bunch of candles.

00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:02,721

ALL:

Ooh.

00:12:02,888 --> 00:12:04,681

Oh!

00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:07,767

Ooh. That had to hurt.

00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:09,728

[GUYS GROANING]

00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,896

Hey, it's your Thanksgiving too.

00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:14,441

You know, instead of watching football,

you could help.

00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:16,526

[IN UNISON]

We know.

00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:20,780

Rachel, you wanna put the marshmallows

in concentric circles.

00:12:20,948 --> 00:12:23,908

No, you wanna put them

in concentric circles.

00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:26,578

I want to do this.

00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,547

Every year.

00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:38,757

[JOEY GRUNTS]

00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:40,341

[PHOEBE GASPS]

00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:42,177

JOEY:

It's stuck.

00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:43,636

PHOEBE:

Well...

00:12:43,804 --> 00:12:46,639

Step. How did it get on?

00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:49,726

I put it on to scare Chandler.

00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:53,354

Oh, my God!

Monica's gonna totally freak out.

00:12:53,522 --> 00:12:55,190

Plus, it smells really bad in here.

00:12:55,357 --> 00:13:00,445

Of course it smells bad.

You have your head inside a turkey's ass.

00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,323

Ooh, ooh. Monica.

00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:04,991

Ooh.

00:13:06,702 --> 00:13:10,747

Did you get the turkey...?

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,707

Who is that?

00:13:12,875 --> 00:13:14,417

JOEY:

It's Joey.

00:13:15,294 --> 00:13:16,544

I got it.

00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:19,339

How about if we win,

they have to get rid of the rooster.

00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:22,008

Ooh, that's interesting.

00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:24,260

If you win...

00:13:24,428 --> 00:13:26,721

...we give up the bird.

- Aah!

00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:31,059

But if we win...

00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,061

...we get your apartment.

00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:36,314

Ooh!

00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,191

- Deal!

- What?

00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:41,903

"What was Monica's nickname

when she was a field-hockey goalie?"

00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,072

- Big Fat Goalie.

- Correct.

00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:47,617

"Rachel claims

this is her favorite movie."

00:13:47,785 --> 00:13:49,202

- Dangerous Liaisons.

ROSS: Correct.

00:13:49,370 --> 00:13:52,831

- "Her actual favorite is?" Correct.

- Weekend at Bernie's.

00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:58,086

"Monica categorizes her towels.

How many categories are there?"

00:13:58,254 --> 00:13:59,587

- Okay, everyday use.

- Fancy.

00:13:59,755 --> 00:14:01,214

- Guest.

- Fancy guest.

00:14:01,423 --> 00:14:03,341

- Two seconds.

- Uh, 11?

00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,551

[TIMER BEEPS]

00:14:04,718 --> 00:14:06,678

Eleven. Unbelievable.

Eleven is correct.

00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,471

- Yes!

JOEY: Ha-ha-ha.

00:14:08,764 --> 00:14:11,599

"Chandler was how old

when he first touched a girl's breast?"

00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:13,059

- Fourteen?

- No, 19.

00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:14,811

Thanks, man.

00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:17,188

"Joey had an imaginary

childhood friend.

00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:19,190

- His name was?"

- Maurice.

00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,234

- "His profession was?"

- Space cowboy!

00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:22,819

ROSS:

Correct.

00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:26,030

"What is Chandler Bing's job?"

00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:29,033

Oh.

00:14:29,785 --> 00:14:30,827

Oh, gosh.

00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:32,620

Ten seconds.

You need this or you lose.

00:14:32,788 --> 00:14:34,914

It has something to do

with transponding.

00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:38,668

Oh! Oh! He's a transponster.

00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:40,879

That's not even a word!

00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:42,797

Oh, my God.

00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,926

- Oh, my God.

- No!

00:14:49,179 --> 00:14:50,263

Whoo!

00:14:50,472 --> 00:14:51,514

[LAUGHS]

00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:55,435

You know what? You are mean boys

who are just being mean.

00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:58,980

Hey, don't get mad at us.

No one forced you to raise the stakes.

00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,691

That is not true. She did. She forced me.

00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:04,444

We'd still be here if you hadn't

got the question wrong.

00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:06,946

Well, it was a stupid, unfair question!

00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:08,781

Don't blame the questions!

00:15:08,949 --> 00:15:11,034

Would you all stop yelling

in our apartment?

00:15:11,201 --> 00:15:14,454

You are ruining moving day for us.

00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:16,205

Chandler!

00:15:19,126 --> 00:15:22,211

Chandler, I saw what you were doing

through the window.

00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:25,548

I saw what you were doing to my sister.

Now, get out here!

00:15:26,050 --> 00:15:28,885

Well, listen, we had a good run.

00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:30,970

You know? What was it?

Four, five months?

00:15:31,138 --> 00:15:33,389

That's more than most people

have in a lifetime.

00:15:33,557 --> 00:15:35,850

So goodbye, take care, bye-bye then.

00:15:37,144 --> 00:15:39,020

Hey, Ross. What's up, bro?

00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:45,234

What the hell are you doing?

00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:46,486

Hey, what's going on?

00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:50,740

Well, I think... I think Ross knows

about me and Monica.

00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:54,285

Dude, he's right there.

00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:59,248

I thought you were my best friend.

This is my sister.

00:15:59,416 --> 00:16:02,585

My best friend and my sister.

I cannot believe this.

00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:06,589

We're not just messing around.

I love her.

00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:08,549

Okay? I'm in love with her.

00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:12,971

I'm so sorry that you

had to find out this way.

00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:17,016

I'm sorry, but it's true. I love him too.

00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,775

My best friend and my sister.

00:16:28,696 --> 00:16:31,072

I cannot believe this.

00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,325

This is the last box of your clothes.

00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:37,453

I'm just gonna label it

"What were you thinking?"

00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:42,500

Funny, I was just gonna go across

the hall and write that on Chandler.

00:16:45,129 --> 00:16:47,839

Okay, you guys, I don't mean

to make things worse, but...

00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,383

...I don't wanna live

with Rachel anymore.

00:16:50,551 --> 00:16:53,136

BOTH: What?

- You're just so mean to each other.

00:16:53,303 --> 00:16:56,556

And I don't wanna end up like that

with Rachel. I still like you.

00:16:57,057 --> 00:16:59,434

Well, Phoebe, that's fine

because I'm not moving.

00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:02,729

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Phoebe, you gotta take her.

00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:05,523

I know I said some bad stuff...

00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:08,860

...but Rachel does have some qualities

that make her a good roommate.

00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,486

She gets tons of catalogs...

00:17:10,654 --> 00:17:14,198

...and, um, she'll fold down the pages

of the things she thinks I'd like.

00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:16,951

- What else?

- Uh...

00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,370

When I take a shower...

00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,664

...she leaves me little notes

on the mirror.

00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:24,083

Yeah, I do. I do do that.

00:17:24,251 --> 00:17:28,296

That's nice. I like having things

to read in the bathroom.

00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:33,009

When I fall asleep on the couch

after reading...

00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:36,220

...she covers me over with a blanket.

00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:40,349

Well, you know,

I don't want you to be cold.

00:17:43,562 --> 00:17:47,106

And when I told her I was

gonna move in with Chandler...

00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,484

...she was really supportive.

00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,946

[SOBBING]

You were so great.

00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,992

You made it so easy.

00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:02,038

And now you have to leave.

00:18:02,206 --> 00:18:04,707

And I have to live with a boy!

00:18:18,847 --> 00:18:20,556

Hey.

00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:24,685

- She really left.

- I know.

00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:30,441

- Thank you.

- No problem, roomie.

00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:40,409

- Can I ask you a question?

- Sure.

00:18:40,577 --> 00:18:43,287

What the hell is that dog doing here?

00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:46,833

- A little toast here. Ding, ding, ding.

ALL: Mm.

00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:50,044

This isn't exactly

the kind of Thanksgiving you planned...

00:18:50,212 --> 00:18:53,923

...but for me this has been really great,

you know?

00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:57,552

I think because it didn't involve divorce...

00:18:57,719 --> 00:18:59,011

...or projectile vomiting.

00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:03,933

I was just thinking,

if you'd gone to Vail...

00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:07,937

...or if you guys had been with your family,

or if you didn't have...

00:19:08,355 --> 00:19:09,772

...syphilis and stuff...

00:19:12,025 --> 00:19:13,985

...we wouldn't be all together, you know?

00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,903

So I guess what I'm trying to say...

00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:21,993

...is that I'm very thankful

that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.

00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:24,662

RACHEL & JOEY:

That's so sweet.

00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:26,497

RACHEL:

Thank you.

00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:27,707

ROSS:

Mm.

00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:30,751

And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.

00:19:30,919 --> 00:19:32,170

And a crappy New Year.

00:19:32,337 --> 00:19:34,797

ALL:

Hear, hear.

00:19:40,721 --> 00:19:42,972

You can't move. You just...

You just can't.

00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,808

Rachel's right.

This is where you guys belong.

00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:49,520

You don't wanna live in Westchester.

That's the worst of the Chesters.

00:19:50,814 --> 00:19:54,317

You know, sometimes when I'm alone

in my apartment, I look over here...

00:19:54,484 --> 00:19:57,820

...and you guys are just having dinner...

00:19:57,988 --> 00:20:00,907

...or watching TV or something...

00:20:01,575 --> 00:20:03,284

...but it makes me feel better.

00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,953

And now when I look over,

who am I gonna see?

00:20:06,121 --> 00:20:09,123

The Gottliebs? The Yangs?

00:20:09,499 --> 00:20:11,375

They don't make me feel so good.

00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:16,881

Yeah. So don't move, okay?

Just stay here...

00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:19,300

...and maybe close your blinds at night.

- Hey.

00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:22,929

[PHONE RINGS]

00:20:23,138 --> 00:20:25,264

[CHANDLER SIGHS]

00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,475

Hello?

00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:32,355

It's Nancy. They responded to our offer.

00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:33,814

And?

00:20:34,858 --> 00:20:36,442

Yeah...

00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:38,903

Okay. Thanks.

00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:41,948

They passed.

00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:46,452

They said they won't go a penny

under the asking price.

00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:49,497

- We can't afford that.

- I know.

00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:53,125

Well, there you go.

00:20:57,965 --> 00:20:59,632

JOEY:

I'm really sorry, you guys.

00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:04,011

Yeah, I'm sorry too. I'm even more sorry

that phone call didn't come...

00:21:04,179 --> 00:21:07,056

...before I told you about looking

through the window.

00:21:07,474 --> 00:21:09,600

Yeah. Well, we're gonna

let you be alone.

00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:11,727

- You gonna be okay?

- Yeah, we'll be okay.

00:21:11,895 --> 00:21:13,938

Love you guys.

00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:18,609

You know, I'm really sorry

I wasn't more supportive before.

00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:20,361

That's okay. We understand.

00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:22,363

Yeah, and about this Nancy...

00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,615

If you're not sleeping with her,

should I?

00:21:31,665 --> 00:21:34,250

I know there'll be other houses,

but I just, uh...

00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:37,586

- I loved that one so much.

- Yeah.

00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:40,131

Well, it's a good thing we got it then.

00:21:41,758 --> 00:21:43,843

- What?

- We got the house.

00:21:44,761 --> 00:21:47,596

- Oh, my God.

- I didn't wanna tell you in front of them.

00:21:47,764 --> 00:21:49,348

We got it? We got the house?

00:21:49,516 --> 00:21:51,475

- We're getting a house.

- Oh!

00:21:53,895 --> 00:21:54,937

CHANDLER:

Mm.

00:21:55,439 --> 00:21:58,190

- We're getting a house.

- And a baby.

00:21:58,358 --> 00:21:59,775

We're growing up.

00:22:01,236 --> 00:22:02,653

We sure are.

00:22:03,613 --> 00:22:04,697

Who's gonna tell them?

00:22:04,865 --> 00:22:07,116

- Not it.

- Not it. Damn it!

00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:13,539

- And, Rachel, this is yours.

- Aah!

00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:15,416

Why? What are these for?

00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:18,336

- You'll see.

- All right, everybody open them.

00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:20,713

[RACHEL & PHOEBE GASP]

00:22:20,881 --> 00:22:23,049

Oh, wow, this is so beautiful.

00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:26,052

Oh, these are the ones

I was looking at in the store.

00:22:26,219 --> 00:22:28,137

MONICA: I know.

- Oh, I love this.

00:22:28,305 --> 00:22:30,723

A meatball sub.

00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,266

Thanks.

00:22:32,434 --> 00:22:35,061

Seriously, guys, what's going on?

What are these for?

00:22:35,270 --> 00:22:38,397

Well, I didn't know

how to tell you before...

00:22:38,565 --> 00:22:40,524

...but we got the house.

- Enjoy.

00:22:45,739 --> 00:22:46,822

What did they say?

00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,161

[English - US - SDH]